Christmas encounter and New Year's questions.

[Tara S]

Tara's Life.

Greetings forum,

This past Christmas I had my first encounter with another woman.

Though I've known her for a few years through the charity we both volunteer for, our encounter certainly wasn't preplanned or even expected. We found ourselves sitting together at a dinner and got to chatting. Things led to things and we ended up back at her place for coffee and ended up in bed (and the couch and the tub and the kitchen counter...)

She's a successful professional in her late 30's, incredibly intelligent, driven, and confident. She just exudes poise and authority.

I've never considered myself to be bisexual and I'm not attracted to women in general (though maybe I should rethink this...). My only kink has been a secret interest in power exchange/bdsm that's never really been acted on (except for a failed attempt to get a now ex-boyfriend to engage in some spanking/dominance with me).

My questions:

She left two days after our encounter for Europe and returns next week. Should I call her? I haven't spoken to her since she left. Does she expect me to call? Will she call me? (I feel like a high school girl with her first crush.)

I don't know what her expectations are, though looking back on it she definitely took the lead and I would even go as far as to say she seduced me (though I didn't resist too much when I realized where she wanted to go).

I do know that I just basked in her attention and interest in me - she's such an incredible and accomplished person. I do know that our love making was the most the most intense and powerful experience I've ever had. In many ways she gave me the experience of submission that I'd been searching for. I'm shaking just thinking about it.

So there you go. Feel free to provide advice - God knows I can't talk to my friends and family about this.....

 

[namron711]

Why not just send her a note, or email, or voicemail...
telling her what a wonderful time you had with her.

Greetings forum,

This past Christmas I had my first encounter with another woman.

Though I've known her for a few years through the charity we both volunteer for, our encounter certainly wasn't preplanned or even expected. We found ourselves sitting together at a dinner and got to chatting. Things led to things and we ended up back at her place for coffee and ended up in bed (and the couch and the tub and the kitchen counter...)

She's a successful professional in her late 30's, incredibly intelligent, driven, and confident. She just exudes poise and authority.

I've never considered myself to be bisexual and I'm not attracted to women in general (though maybe I should rethink this...). My only kink has been a secret interest in power exchange/bdsm that's never really been acted on (except for a failed attempt to get a now ex-boyfriend to engage in some spanking/dominance with me).

My questions:

She left two days after our encounter for Europe and returns next week. Should I call her? I haven't spoken to her since she left. Does she expect me to call? Will she call me? (I feel like a high school girl with her first crush.)

I don't know what her expectations are, though looking back on it she definitely took the lead and I would even go as far as to say she seduced me (though I didn't resist too much when I realized where she wanted to go).

I do know that I just basked in her attention and interest in me - she's such an incredible and accomplished person. I do know that our love making was the most the most intense and powerful experience I've ever had. In many ways she gave me the experience of submission that I'd been searching for. I'm shaking just thinking about it.

So there you go. Feel free to provide advice - God knows I can't talk to my friends and family about this.....

 

[Tara S]

Thanks namron. That's a good idea - though I still wonder if I should let her make the first contact. I don't know her email but it would be pretty easy to find out. I won't leave a voicemail though. I'm no good at those.

Why not just send her a note, or email, or voicemail...
telling her what a wonderful time you had with her.

 

[trask9]

I definitely would contact her somehow to let her know how much you enjoyed her company and that you would love to see her upon her return from Europe. Don't be shy, show your interest and if she is interested then she will let you know. Don't miss this opportunity, you may not get another.
Remember, you only go around once in this big ole world, good luck
TJ

 

[alltherage]

I absolutely believe in open communication. One of my greatest fears in relationship communication is to find myself being silent because of my shyness or fear and never realizing that the other person is doing the same for the same reason. So communicate, just don't ask to move in.

 

[Tara S]

Thanks alltherage and TJ, both excellent points.

I get butterflies thinking about her and yet I'm afraid that it will turn into something or maybe nothing...

I have a few more days until she gets back so I have some time to think about what to say, but I guess I'll drop her an email or maybe a hand written note.

Sigh... life is so complicated sometimes.

 

[alltherage]

Its the complications that make life worth living.

 

[Tara S]

Its the complications that make life worth living.

very true

 

[trask9]

Good Luck Tara, keep us posted on the outcome.
Don't be shy. Be honest, open , and caring. TJ

 

[alltherage]

I just have to say that one of the hottest women I have ever been with swore she was straight as a arrow but by god her orgasms screamed biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

 

[Tara S]

I've been thinking a lot about that label since Christmas. Some thoughts:

Though I made an incredible emotional and physical connection with one woman I still don't see making that connection with women generally. Although, I think I would be more receptive to a connection in the future than I was before Christmas.

I don't feel shame about my experience but I don't want people close to me to know about it.

I don't have a lot of different sexual experiences to draw from, but that was the best experience I've had by a long long margin. I completely turned to jello more than once and looking back I'm afraid I made noises and said things that I would be completely embarrassed by if I heard them coming from someone else. lol

Regardless of the plumbing I think I would have been attracted to her if she were a man. She has a strength and forthrightness that I find attractive.

Thanks for the input everyone. It's a relief for me to talk about this.

I just have to say that one of the hottest women I have ever been with swore she was straight as a arrow but by god her orgasms screamed biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

 

[DimplesCharlie]

TaraS:

What does your heart tell you to do? Would you like to see her again? If so, I'd contact her in some way that is most comfortable to you to let her know how much you enjoyed her company and would like to see her again. Go with your heart or gut feeling. Don't worry about labels or what others may think.

Carpe Diem
~Chuck~

 

[horsie_gurl]

I saw someone else mention this as i was skimming through responses, and it is definately a good point. If you really want to spend time with her again (and i think the shaking gives it away haha) then you should contact her. I dont know what kind of person she is, but some people would think too much and both of you would wait for the other to come in contact...well if you both wait nothing is going to happen. and the worst she can say is no...you at least have this wonderful experience, and if she brought it on like you say most likely you wont be turned down. :]

Have fun with your new found lover and take care of yourself.

 

[Night_Jasmine]

I say contact her. And you lucky girl you!!!

I wouldn't mind finding someone like that!

 

[dizzylia]

As has been mentioned before, communication is key. You can be honest without letting all the marbles spill out of the bag.

If nothing more, you could tell her you had a wonderful (extraordinary) time, wish her safe travels, and wait to see if she replies. If she would like it to be more than a Christmas fling, it sounds like she's the type of person to let you know. At least this way she knows that you are not necessarily limiting it to the Christmas fling.

Also, as it sounds like you might see this woman at another point in the future regardless of romance, it's not a bad idea to leave things on a positive, receptive note.

Good luck. It's not an easy question. Hell, I still question myself from time to time, and I accepted myself as bi more than ten years ago. My own path also followed something along the lines of, "I'm not gay, but there's this girl..."

People are people. Genders are details.


-dizzy

 

[StrixVaria]

Tara - you have PM

 

[Xtinas_Girlfriend]

People are people. Genders are details.:

I LOVE that!

 

[dizzylia]

I LOVE that!

*grins* Thank you. 2:00 a.m. and cold meds sometimes have good outcomes.

 

[Tara S]

People are people. Genders are details.

Very nice dizzylia



As for me:

I wrote a dozen short notes today on beautiful artsy papers.

I settled for a simple sentiment: I enjoyed our time together and I would love to get to know you better.

Took a full minute maybe two to let it drop from my fingers into the post box.

It's done.

Thank you everyone.

 

[dizzylia]

I settled for a simple sentiment: I enjoyed our time together and I would love to get to know you better.

Took a full minute maybe two to let it drop from my fingers into the post box.

It's done.

Thank you everyone.

Best of luck, Tara.

 

[Anniejustagirl]

Good on you!

Very nice dizzylia



As for me:

I wrote a dozen short notes today on beautiful artsy papers.

I settled for a simple sentiment: I enjoyed our time together and I would love to get to know you better.

Took a full minute maybe two to let it drop from my fingers into the post box.

It's done.

Thank you everyone.

 

[DimplesCharlie]

Very nice dizzylia



As for me:

I wrote a dozen short notes today on beautiful artsy papers.

I settled for a simple sentiment: I enjoyed our time together and I would love to get to know you better.

Took a full minute maybe two to let it drop from my fingers into the post box.

It's done.

Thank you everyone.

Tara S

Nicely done I hope things turn out well for you. do you plan to let us know how the situation turns out??

~Chuck~

 

[Night_Jasmine]

Good luck, and please let us know how it went.

*giggles* I'm still waiting to find my Ms. Right and haven't yet, so stories like these make me happy. If it works out, you should write this up.

 

[Tara S]

Happy news dearest forum,

She finally called this afternoon and we're going out to dinner this weekend.

I was beginning to think that she wasn't ever going to call but happily I was wrong. What to wear? What to wear?

 

[dizzylia]

Happy news dearest forum,

She finally called this afternoon and we're going out to dinner this weekend.

I was beginning to think that she wasn't ever going to call but happily I was wrong. What to wear? What to wear?

Wheee!​

That's wonderful news!