Hullo_nurse
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 4, 1999
- Posts
- 572
I usually try to see the good in all things, even when there isn't any good to be had. But this story is the exception. I couldn't get past the first few paragraphs.
Tooooooooo many run on sentances and more commas than I have ever seen used before. The sentances are chopped up by improperly and overused commas.
The content may very well be excellent, but trying to get past the punctuation was too much for me.
Please!! If you want your stories read, please use the expertese of the volunteer editors here at the site. They can only make your work better.
Tooooooooo many run on sentances and more commas than I have ever seen used before. The sentances are chopped up by improperly and overused commas.
The content may very well be excellent, but trying to get past the punctuation was too much for me.
Please!! If you want your stories read, please use the expertese of the volunteer editors here at the site. They can only make your work better.
