Casting Call: Sailing of the Crimson tide investment insurance agency

[Khadgar]

alright people. this is the call for the crinsom tide. you know, from monty pythons the meaning of life.

if anyone is interested but doesn't know ask. we'll tell you

basicly old people take controll of the crinsom tide envestment insurance agency and sail the land looking for metropolises. useing their filing cabnet cannons and grapling hooks and fan swords they take over other corporations.

 

[crysede]

I can't even imagine what this will be like as a thread, but I definitely want to be on board! I'd be happy to play either a member of the crew, or one of the metropolises. Here's a picture of Monty's original Crimson Permanent Assurance (I think our investment agency has an even better name), to inspire the crew.
http://bau2.uibk.ac.at/sg/python/Images/building1.jpg
Oh, and if anyone wants to see a few more pics of the Crimson Permanent Assurance, here's a link.
http://www.stone-dead.asn.au/movies/crimson-permanent-assurance/pictures.html

 

[Khadgar]

lol forgot it was crimson permenant insurance! what do you mean be be a metropolis? crew members are fine

thanks for the pic! had a good laugh.

 

[Trey Fitty]

sounds interesting...

I've seen The Meaning of Life twice, ages ago. Can't remember the Crimson Permenant Insurance piece though...
If I get any ideas I'll be in.

P.S. What kind of characters are involved?

 

[Khadgar]

char

well, basicly the senior citezens of the building throw all the young guys out the window and dress up like pirates. so... old guy, or young guy

 

[crysede]

what do you mean be be a metropolis?

Well, the crew will need to metropolises to vanquish, I figured you might need someone to play the workers of a metropolis under attack.

 

[Khadgar]

of course.... if you want to play them, sure lol by all means.

 

[crysede]

of course.... if you want to play them, sure lol by all means.

Cool! I might play a crew member too, if it's ok with you, since the metropolis roles will be rather short lived.

 

[Khadgar]

lol go right ahead. we are rather short on crew members right now lol

 

[Trey Fitty]

Hmmm, Ether a young guy who dies or an old geezer who lives! Descisions descisions...

 

[faust]

Count me in!

Heh, that was a great movie. Alright, I'll be one of the old guys/pirates.

 

[crysede]

Oh Khaaaaaadgar!

So are we going to wait to play this thread until after the grail, or run them both at the same time? Might be easier to just do one Monty thread at a time, but you're the boss!
For now anyway *evil chuckle* - wait, did I say that outloud?

 

[Khadgar]

i think i heard that crysede! hmm.... one, or both.... if we wait this might lose interest.... what do you think?

 

[Khadgar]

i think i heard that crysede! hmm.... one, or both.... if we wait this might lose interest.... what do you think? it might be a good idea, but this one might die if we string it out too long

 

[Khadgar]

what the.... isn't that odd....

 

[crysede]

what the.... isn't that odd....

Yes, definitely! Hmmmm, your computer isn't cursed is it?

Well I'm not going to lose interest - I'm amazingly proficient at maintaining my level of interest. We should see what Trey and Faust think though. Guys?

 

[Khadgar]

bump

 

[Zircon]

BUMP

Newflash:

The ship has just hit another Metropolis



Z

 

[chewbacca71]

what the.... isn't that odd....

Another example of Khad's master plan to catch up with Blaze. hehehe

Chewey

 

[Lauren Hynde]

YAY!!!!

The meaning of life is one of my all time favorites! I want in!!!

 

[Lauren Hynde]

And I never lose interest! I won't go away even if you shoo me!

 

[Lauren Hynde]

NARRATOR:
In the bleak days of nineteen-eighty-three, as England languished in the doldrums of a ruinous monetarist policy, the good and loyal men of the Permanent Assurance Company-- a once-proud family firm, recently fallen in hard times-- strained under the yoke of their oppressive new corporate management.

(should I go on or does Khad want the whole script for the actual thread?)

 

[Khadgar]

holy crap was this ever dug up out of the crypts of lit!


nice lauren. i don't mind you giving out the story. by all means, set us up. i'll go along with everything.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

CRIMSON PERMANENT ASSURANCE

NARRATOR:

In the bleak days of nineteen-eighty-three, as England languished in the doldrums of a ruinous monetarist policy, the good and loyal men of the Permanent Assurance Company-- a once-proud family firm, recently fallen in hard times-- strained under the yoke of their oppressive new corporate management.

Pushed beyond the bounds of decent and reasonable victimisation, the aged retainers take their destiny in their own hands and-- Mutiny!

And so, the Crimson Permanent Assurance was launched upon the high seas of international finance.

There it lay, the prize they sought, the richest jewel in the crown of the I.M.F.: a financial district swollen with multi-nationals, conglomerates, and fat, bloated merchant banks.

Hidden behind the faceless, towering canyons of glass, the world of high finance sat smug and self-satisfied as their future, in the shape of their past, slipped silently through the streets, returning to wreak a terrible revenge.

Adopting, adapting, and improving traditional business practises, the Permanent Assurance puts into motion an audacious and totally unsuspected takeover bid.

And so, heartened by their initial success, the desperate and reasonably violent men of the Permanent Assurance battled on... until, as the sun set slowly in the west, the outstanding return on their bold business venture became apparent: the once-proud financial giants lay in ruins, their assets stripped, their policies in tatters.

PIRATE:
Full speed ahead, Mr. Cohen!

CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium. Up, up, up your premium.

PIRATE: [singing]
Scribble away!

CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.

PIRATE: [singing]
And balance the books.

CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.

PIRATE: [singing]
Scribble away!

CHORUS:
Up, up, up your premium.

PIRATE: [singing]
But manage the books.

CHORUS:
Up, up, up.

PIRATES: [singing]
It's fun to charter an accountant
And sail the wide accountancy,
To find, explore the funds offshore
And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy!
It can be manly in insurance.
We'll up your premium semi-annually.
It's all tax deductible.
We're fairly incorruptible,
We're sailing on the wide accountancy!

PIRATE: [singing]
Sail away!

CHORUS: [singing]
Up, up, up...

NARRATOR:
And so, they sailed off into the ledgers of history, one by one, the financial capitals of the world crumbling under the might of their business acumen,... or so it would have been... if certain modern theories concerning the shape of the world had not proved to be... disastrously wrong.

http://www.stone-dead.asn.au/movies/crimson-permanent-assurance/pictures/48-end.jpg

 

[Lauren Hynde]

THE MEANING OF LIFE (between Parts 5: Live Organ Transplants and 6: The Automn Years)

CHAIRMAN: ...Which brings us once again to the urgent realisation of just how much there is still left to own. Item six on the agenda: the meaning of life. Now, uh, Harry, you've had some thoughts on this.

HARRY: That's right. Yeah, I've had a team working on this over the past few weeks, and, uh, what we've come up with can be reduced to two fundamental concepts. One: people are not wearing enough hats. Two: matter is energy. In the universe, there are many energy fields which we cannot normally perceive. Some energies have a spiritual source which act upon a person's soul. However, this soul does not exist ab initio, as orthodox Christianity teaches. It has to be brought into existence by a process of guided self-observation. However, this is rarely achieved, owing to man's unique ability to be distracted from spiritual matters by everyday trivia.

[pause]

BERT: What was that about hats, again?

HARRY: Oh, uh, people aren't wearing enough.

CHAIRMAN: Is this true?

EDMUND: Certainly. Hat sales have increased, but not pari passu, as our research initially--

BERT: But when you say 'enough', enough for what purpose?

GUNTHER: Can I just ask, with reference to your second point, when you say souls don't develop because people become distracted,... [rumble] ...has anyone noticed that building there before?

RANDOM: Ohh.

RANDOM: My God!

CHAIRMAN: Good Lord!

[crash]

[exciting music]

[crash]

EVERYONE: [mumbling] [crash]

CRIMSON PERMANENT ASSURANCE PIRATE: Aaaaah!

[crash]

CHAIRMAN: Good Lord! The Crimson Permanent Assurance!

PROJECTIONIST: We interrupt this film to apologise for this unwarranted attack by the supporting feature. Luckily, we have been prepared for this eventuality, and are now taking steps to remedy it. [creak] [boom] Thank you.