Burned by a vitriolic author

[KOLKORE]

Has anyone had a similar experience? How do you deal with it?
When I was responding to the story “Requital” by Longhorn_07, I have already known that Literotica allows its authors the option to block all messages or erase particular messages per author’s discretion. Yet, nothing prepared me to what came next.
My comments touched on the issue of the author reliance on detailed therapy protocols as the core of the plot. It was my opinion that in leaning so much on disciplines which most readers do not have access to ( and in my mind neither did the writer), he was making a wrong judgment. My view was that he would do better if he moved more of his plot to areas that most people can judge based on their common life experience.
Another reader asked me to be more specific. Initially I was reluctant because my point was not the particulars of couples counseling (I happen to be a professional therapist), but the reliance on detailed protocols – and even if he was accurate in his description of couple’s counseling, my reaction would have been the same, it is still a “black box” to most readers. I responded on the public board clarifying my initial comments and adding few examples to illustrate the problems with the description of the couple’s therapy.
Next thing I know, the author deletes both my messages (including retroactively, the one he kept earlier). I communicated with the author via e-mail, questioning his action but staying respectful. I received a vitriolic response referring; I will have to say, unkindly, to my mental and intellectual qualities… plus a declaration of expulsion from ever being allowed to present my opinions next to his stories. Kidding aside, I have never experienced anything like that, and even though I criticized an aspect of this author’s writing I never hated him. In all my messages, no matter how misguided I could have been, I never once, attacked him personally, used foul language, or discussed anything but the substance of the stories.
You could say: get over it, move on and don’t read him. But the truth is that my intentions WERE BENIGN, and I have not seen it coming. I don’t know how to deal with this kind of hate. It takes away some of the pleasure from free and open intellectual exchanges. (I could supply anyone who might be interested with the details of my comments or the author’s message to me.) I will appreciate your thoughts.
-A burned reader.

 

[PAPATOAD]

Understand

I shouldn't have commented. Sorry.

 

[silverwhisper]

wow, that's weird. i've heard of rudeness in commenting, but never in responses from the author. the only thing i can think of is that it's very, very hard sometimes to gauge tone in written communication. is it at all possible the author misread the context of your comments?

another possibility: perhaps the author already received negative feedback causing an overreaction not warranted by your comments?

ed

 

[Pure]

Moved-comment

Kolkore,

I have moved your posting to the Author's Hangout, since it appears interesting. It does not belong in the Story Disc Circle, where I am the moderator.

Part of what you say, sounds confusing:

Another reader asked me to be more specific. Initially I was reluctant because my point was not the particulars of couples counseling (I happen to be a professional therapist), but the reliance on detailed protocols – and even if he was accurate in his description of couple’s counseling, my reaction would have been the same, it is still a “black box” to most readers. I responded on the public board clarifying my initial comments and adding few examples to illustrate the problems with the description of the couple’s therapy.

Next thing I know, the author deletes both my messages (including retroactively, the one he kept earlier). (including retroactively, the one he kept earlier). I communicated with the author via e-mail, questioning his action but staying respectful. I received a vitriolic response referring; I will have to say, unkindly, to my mental and intellectual qualities… plus a declaration of expulsion from ever being allowed to present my opinions next to his stories
----

The public comment area attached to an author's story --[at the end, where it says, would you like to leave a comment?] is his or her domain, and s/he can delete what s/he pleases, though in some cases it's foolish (since stupid comments reflect on the maker of the comment).

The Author's Hangout AND the General Board are unmoderated and you can comment on anyone you please, any lit. author you please, within lit guidelines-- e.g., you may not give his/her home address and suggest burning the house down. He or she, equally may respond.

In these two places, postings can only be deleted by Laurel. So you are free, within the law and lit. rules to post as you wish. You can further discuss that person and/or his work with others, or, if you're not trying to win anyone over, you can insult him or his ancestry (a certain amount of flaming, though stupid, is legal, and allowed). Posting in certain other forums can be effectively deleted by the moderator, but not by a person mentioned unfavorably.

I gather you don't think mr. x described couples therapy very accurately.
What puzzles me is your emotional involvement in such a description, within a story at a porn and erotica story (fiction) site. It is not a description for therapists in training. One could equally, I suppose, pick at a story's picture of New York: Say: "How can the character walk E on First Avenue, when it runs north and south?"

Usually, of course, authors appreciate polite corrections regarding facts.
I have no idea what the other side in this dispute is, but be warned that just as you can 'roast' someone in this forum or the general board, he is entitled to roast you in return. Usually, however, people tire of insults, and the person who appears calmest and sanest will carry the day with 'public opinion' (if that matters).

 

[CharleyH]

Kolkore,

I have moved your posting to the Author's Hangout, since it appears interesting. It does not belong in the Story Disc Circle, where I am the moderator.

Usually, of course, authors appreciate polite corrections regarding facts.

Happy you posted, Pure, as I was confused and just about to post to how in the world an author could delete things. Hopefully, Kolkore will understand.

 

[KOLKORE]

Thank you for responding

I would like to follow up on your comments.
Regarding the confusion in my writing. I just tried to supply the chronology of the interaction with the author. I was thinking that any information may provide a key where I did not see one. Essentially my initial message was acceptable (in the sense that the message was not deleted) up to the point where I responded to another reader’s request for clarification/details. Then, when I responded - the ire of the author landed. My effort to interact with him via e-mail seems to have inflamed him further, as reflected in his vitriolic e mail to me (including my final ‘expulsion’).
Regarding my professional capacity and my emotional involvement. I have no emotional involvement with the level of accuracy of the fictitious couple’s therapy story. I am offended by the rudeness and by the intolerance as conveyed by erasing my messages and by the hateful e mail that he sent to me. Even therapists are not immuned to that kind of behavior.

 

[M-Y-Erotica]

The most important thing is that I hope that you will not give up on attempting genuine interaction with authors. You got a reaction you never expected from someone, and there is no way to understand it without getting inside the other person's head. As I have no desire to read a flame war between the two of you, I hope that doesn't occur here (though you should not have mentioned his or her name unless you wanted to start just that.) People view their message boards in so many different ways. For some, it is just a place where people post and they couldn't care less what is there. Others view it almost like blurbs on the back of their book and who would publish a book that has anything other than glowing blurbs on the back? You can never know which one you are dealing with.

And, of course, people take even constructive criticism in so many ways. For instance, when I do nothing other than praise a story, I frequently hear back. When I say I liked this aspect and didn't like something else, I never hear a peep. I am sure some of them are thinking "what a bitch; who does she think she is anyway?"

All that said, there are many who would love to get useful feedback from people they respect. I would not be happy to get it immediately, but I will almost certainly try to use it for the next story if it is legitimate.

The short version: who knows why people act the way they do, but don't give up on us.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Most authors enjoy feedback. to varrying degrees we welcome constuctive Criticism. To varrying degrees we are also the target of Snerts.

How thick a writer's skin is depends on a ton of things. Newer authors tend to be more touchy as they haven't had time to get their feet under them. Also, many new writers have produced a work with deeply personal feelings entwined. It's part of what motivates them to write and post in the first place. Conversely, some prolific or sucessful writers also get touchy. the same critique, delivered again and again tends to wear on you and if you have a bunch of H's or E's or W's, you can develop the feeling it's the same person banging you constantly. Then too, we get a lot of critique that isn't constructive, although the reader may belive it is.

A fine example from my writing is notes telling me how much better the story could have been if I had only inluded a man int he sex scens along with elaborate scenarios to get him there or long justifications of why he should have been there. While this very well might have made the story more enjoyable for that particular reader, it isn't constructive criticism, because it's trying to rewrite my story. And I get that quet a bit, in very mild form to ver vitrupritive remonstances that all women are straight and if I don't believe it I just haven;'t found the right man yet.

If I get six or eight of these hard core preachy salvos thrown my way, I might very well react to the next one less civilly than I should. It's not fair, but the real nasty ones are always annonyamous, so a writer migh have quite a bit of the "I'm sick of hearing this crap" built up when a less nasty resonce comes from someone who is trying to help and leaves a return addy. Sionce I recognize it, I don't think I've ever let it happen, but I've come to expect such responses. Some writers, due to subject matter or experience have not. You could well have been catching hob for similar and less helpful comments. Who's to say?

that's a long way to say something simple. When you respond to a work, you can't be any more sure of the response to that than the writer is to posting a work. It takes all kinds and all kinds write and respond. Take it with a grain of salt and don't let it stop you from interacting with the writers here.

-Colly

 

[Pure]

further

Hi Kolkore,

I was responding to your apparent sense of 'this is not how things should be.'

You respond.


I was thinking that any information may provide a key where I did not see one. Essentially my initial message was acceptable (in the sense that the message was not deleted) up to the point where I responded to another reader’s request for clarification/details. Then, when I responded - the ire of the author landed. My effort to interact with him via e-mail seems to have inflamed him further, as reflected in his vitriolic e mail to me (including my final ‘expulsion’).

If you only wish to speculate in psychological terms, feel free, and if you want other's speculations, fine. It's a bit like my saying, "The cashier at the supermarket snarled at me, I wonder why."

Your above message though, still confuses the issue, in speaking of an 'acceptable' message. The point is: In the Author's comment area he may do as he pleases. He may change his mind, and delete something he previously let stand. He can 'nuke' all comments.

I'm not sure why this is a concern for you. What I tried to point out is that there are a couple a places you can 'air' and debate to your heart's content. IF mr x misunderstands therapy, and yanks your chain, you can let the world know.

IF you think he's an intemperate bastard, you may say that.

When all is said and done though, you'll do best if you stay polite and factual. That is the best way to convince others--as you seem to want to-- that mr x is mistaken about something, or mishandles his 'comment' area, or whatever.

Though I don't know the big picture, in a small way I do agree with him: The comment area is not meant as a debate forum, in which the author engages his critics (unless that's what the author wants). IF you want to discuss x's story or debate its merits, there are the venues I've spoken of, and he can join in, or ignore the debate as he sees fit, but he cannot shut it down. And the same holds if he starts a thread about your shortcomings as a person or author.

PS. I agree with Colly and M-Y-E above, regarding 'talking' with authors. There are hundreds to choose from. IF indeed, mr x is thin skinned there are others to interact with, and maybe some will like your comments and suggestions. Some may become friends, while others can't stand you.
So go towards the brighter possibilities.




-----
Kolkore said,

I would like to follow up on your comments.
Regarding the confusion in my writing. I just tried to supply the chronology of the interaction with the author. I was thinking that any information may provide a key where I did not see one.

Essentially my initial message was acceptable (in the sense that the message was not deleted) up to the point where I responded to another reader’s request for clarification/details. Then, when I responded - the ire of the author landed. My effort to interact with him via e-mail seems to have inflamed him further, as reflected in his vitriolic e mail to me (including my final ‘expulsion’).

Regarding my professional capacity and my emotional involvement. I have no emotional involvement with the level of accuracy of the fictitious couple’s therapy story. I am offended by the rudeness and by the intolerance as conveyed by erasing my messages and by the hateful e mail that he sent to me. Even therapists are not immuned to that kind of behavior.

 

[MichelleLovesTo]

My Take.

Some writers do better with criticism than others -- and in some cases the tone of the criticism is the deciding factor. I feel that, if I choose to put my work out there, others should be able to respectfully tell me what they didn't like. Others might disagree.

Someone would have to be pretty abusive for me to delete their comment.

I suppose the only aspect that bothers me here is people reading stories that are not in a genre they like, and then marking the story way down. I've never written a Loving Wife, but it seems like it's a jungle there -- with people freely attacking others and punishing them in the voting.

 

[KOLKORE]

Better perspective, more questions.

From reading your perspectives on readers - authors’ relations, and upon reflection, I believe that I have a better understanding of the dynamics that takes place in Literotica, and its effect on me. From some I got the benefit of sharing the view ‘from the other side. In addition, I took to heart the encouragement to keep the search for meaningful, experience in reading and exchanging views. Thank you again for that. I want to expand a bit in my response to Pure which was both instructive and surprising. I was surprised by your comment that in a small way the author’s actions were right. Exactly what part of his actions do you feel was right? I don’t remember saying that I was looking for debates or literary discussions with the author. I wrote two reasoned messages (among 88 other responses of other readers), focusing on the story alone. Only when the messages were suddenly removed, did I try to contact the author (he invited readers to do so if they provide a return e-mail), only to get back fouled language hate mail.
If the idea is that because according to the rules of Literoica the feedback to the stories is the author’s domain, and therefore every thing they do is right - then I can see the logic, while obviously see it as unacceptable. People use judgment and norms to implement rules. The author promised to ban me from commenting on his stories from now on. Is that right? And what if he decided to put an attack peace on me on “his domain” it’s all within ‘his rights’ according to the rules. Would that be right too? (An example of the “I did it because I could” logic);
If one is willing to go that far, than one removes the logical ground to one’s own argument. The very use of the word ‘right’ versus wrong becomes irrelevant. If every thing is right, nothing wrong, there is no more relevance to this concept. Is that what the feedback section supposed to mean for authors and readers. I don’t think that either of us wishes it to be that way, but unless more thought is brought to the issue that’s where it might be going. I am planning on starting a new thread on the relations between readers and writers in literotica where I would
expand on the issue. Thanks for your advice and thoughts which helped me where I liked the comments and even more when I did not.

 

[thebullet]

Kolkore:
For some reason, certain people are just set off by a certain kind of criticsm, regardless of how sincerely it is presented. There was one author who used to leave scathing comments in the start of his/her stories about the criticism he/she had received from a previous story. I actually stopped reading him/her since he/she seemed so petty in his/her response to constructive criticism. (was that sexually neutral enough?)

Longhorn apparantlley has a pretty thin skin, too, I guess. His writing is terrific, though I'm novice enough to admit that any representation he made about therapy I would have to accept at face value. You, as a professional, are of course far better qualified to comment about such things.

In my own writing I try to be meticulous about writing about specialized areas that require an insider's or expert's point of view. I generally do research to augment my own knowledge of the subject.

I like Longhorn and his work and am reluctant to criticize his decisions. But again, some people just have a short fuse.

I wouldn't take it too much to heart if I were you.

 

[Pure]

Response to Kolkore

Hi Kolkore,

I will respond to your points, but first quote what I said, that youre responding to.

Previously I said,

Though I don't know the big picture, in a small way I do agree with him: The comment area is not meant as a debate forum, in which the author engages his critics (unless that's what the author wants). IF you want to discuss x's story or debate its merits, there are the venues I've spoken of, and he can join in, or ignore the debate as he sees fit, but he cannot shut it down. And the same holds if he starts a thread about your shortcomings as a person or author.

As you persist, I'm increasingly sympathetic to Mr. X. If I may use an analogy, your behavior reminds me one of those door-to-door evangelists who knocks on my door, and when i open it, wants to have a 'reasoned discusion' at 9am Sunday morning. I'm in my pyjamas and he stands there, on my front porch trying to 'discuss', so finally I say "Get off my porch. Do not come back or I'll call the cops." He says, "What can possibly be 'wrong' about my trying to discuss something with you? "

Take him away, officer!

The comment area attached to an author's story is like his 'front porch', his to do with as he pleases within the law and lit. rules.

You say,

I was surprised by your comment that in a small way the author’s actions were right. Exactly what part of his actions do you feel was right? I don’t remember saying that I was looking for debates or literary discussions with the author. I wrote two reasoned messages (among 88 other responses of other readers), focusing on the story alone. Only when the messages were suddenly removed, did I try to contact the author (he invited readers to do so if they provide a return e-mail), only to get back fouled language hate mail.

If the idea is that because according to the rules of Literoica the feedback to the stories is the author’s domain, and therefore every thing they do is right - then I can see the logic, while obviously see it as unacceptable. People use judgment and norms to implement rules. The author promised to ban me from commenting on his stories from now on. Is that right?

And what if he decided to put an attack peace on me on “his domain” it’s all within ‘his rights’ according to the rules. Would that be right too? (An example of the “I did it because I could” logic);
If one is willing to go that far, than one removes the logical ground to one’s own argument. The very use of the word ‘right’ versus wrong becomes irrelevant.

-----

The piece above is nonsense built upon putting words in my mouth. I said, in a small way, I agreed with Mr X [ending your presence]. The comment area is his to do with as he pleases; as long as he follows the law and lit rules. (Consider it to be like the dustjacket of a book of his; as you know, on dustjackets, authors and publishers *select* from responses. ) I did not bring into the discussion 'right' and 'wrong' as you are attempting to. His actions do not fall within the sphere of morality, any more than his planting petunias instead of carrots in his back yard (and you, being vegetarian, disapprove). Or his not inviting you to his next party.

The only traction of your argument is this point:
And what if he decided to put an attack peace[sic] on me on “his domain” it’s all within ‘his rights’ according to the rules. Would that be right too?

A clear wrong, BUT...Well, he didn't do it, did he? So the clearest 'wrong' you can come up with is an invention, a hypothetical: "Suppose he attacked me, in his comment area."

We have an interesting case, here, of "The pot calling the kettle black."
You have attacked him, though not in a comment area. Here, publically.

Further you have not chosen to debate the original substantive issue, anywhere, so far as I know: The alleged mis characterization of marital therapy as you know it.

To get back to my pesky evangelist. You have every right in several spots to debate the issue of representation of therapy. You can even debate Mr. X's character. But you don't. You complain about an alleged 'wrong.' ]And to make sure we think he's wrong, you have us consider acts he hasn't done.

You have named him and tried to attract support on what are apparently flimsy grounds. Why do I now say 'flimsy'? Because you have never elaborated your original point *where you can*, as far as I know. [If you have, say where.] For example, here. The appearance is that you intend, simply to complain; to keep this process going about not being able to post your 'reasoned' pieces in his 'comment area', an private area of his.

I'm led to suspect that any 'case' of yours simply amounts to your hurt feelings. I'm having my doubts about the characterizations you make and would like us to 'buy.'

{edited, 1:22 pm EST}

 

[elsol]

To answer your question, Kolk.

Yes, it happens for all the reasons Colly gave.

What would I do?

Don't read the author anymore.

Don't read this thread anymore.

But that's just me.

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[KOLKORE]

Rules vs. norms in the author’s public comment area

Let me first remind any one who reads, I did not post this thread on this particular discussion board to begin with. My intention was to discuss among readers, how they feel when they ‘make their homework’ and write a comment to the best of their ability on a story, and get "burned" by the author in one way or another. I did not want to attack the author, but seeked advice as to how to adjust my expectations. In addition, I wanted to learn from other people’s experience. Except from Pure’s take (legitimate as anyone else) the other responses were in tune with my initial purpose. What I certainly did not expect was to be further attacked.
I never intended to get into the details of my messages to the story(although I offered to e-mail them to any one who wishes to review them). The issues which I was discussing pertained to the undesirability (IMO) of including detailed technical protocols of any specialized professional discipline which most readers nay not have access to. I meant in particular, while using these protocols as the main vehicle of the plot. Not as a background to the plot. My second message gave few examples from couple’s counseling, to illustrate what I saw as such mistakes. But the reason I did not bring it up is that, in essence, it is totally IRRELEVENT. I grant any reader that any word that I wrote could have been total nonsense; totally unfounded - logically and/ or professionally. It’s irrelevant because it was still my view, it pertained to the story, and many readers did not have a chance to decide If I indeed am an idiot or not. Should I reasonably expect to be deleted at any time? Should any thing, if any, be done about it? Are there different approaches to this issue out there?
My question and request for advice were principled, and while touching on the issue of the rules in literotica, to the most part it’s about the norms and the judgment of most writers and readers. As I stated in my first sentence of my initial message - I know the rules in Literotica. Yet, in addition to the rules, life presents us with the reality (great number of people who prefer to comment on the author’s feedback board, plus the common norms and common judgment of most writers and readers in implementing the rules. Most people got me right on that.
Back to Pure’s response. I am sorry for using the word “right”. I did not quote you, but when you convey that you agree with Mr x and the reference is to what I conveyed that he did, then I don’t see the difference between ‘I agree with him’ and ‘he was right’. Your language though is unnecessarily inflammatory and insulting and does not fit IMO to your role as a moderator (or strengthen your arguments).
I am addressing the following questions to anyone who may provide their own view to these questions. If Pure wishes to address what I am saying rather than re quote himself and then insult me, I would still appreciate his comments.
I see it not as a lingering personal hurt that still needs heeling. I believe, as I said in the beginning to my previous message that I moved on. I am interested though in this case as a test case for examining the boundaries or the limits (if any) to the definition of the reader’s feedback as "the authors’ private domain"
1. Was I mistaken in not denying myself of what 88 other readers in that case have done (I could not predict ahead of time that I would be deleted). (Not theoretical).
2. Was I mistaken in responding to the author’s invitation to all readers to write to him with attached e-mail address? (Not theoretical).
3. Is it an expected or acceptable norm to get a hate mail in response to an invited message by authors? (I will send it to any one who wishes to review it). (Not theoretical).
4. Is it an acceptable use of the authors' private domain to ban reader/s future comments regardless of the content i.e. preemptively? (Not theoretical)
5. Would it be acceptable to criticize readers if he/she could not respond on the same forum? (This is NOT a hypothetical. Immediately, after I was deleted there was the author’s posting thanking the “real professionals who complimented him”…).
6. Is there any ethical limit in your minds to authors’ use of their private domain vis-a-vis readers?

 

[Pure]

I will respond to a single point, only; since it's of general relevance.
I remind you that Author's Hangout has no moderator, and I am a moderator elsewhere (SDC).

3. Is it an expected or acceptable norm to get a hate mail in response to an invited message by authors?

This is based on the common norms and common judgment of most writers and readers

Actually, you mean to ask, "Is it against the norms to send a hate email in response to a criticism?"

If you look at the general board, you will see postings like "XXXX you are stupid, cum-sucking cunt!" where XXXX has the power to remove that posting. So, as far as Lit. goes, hateful postings are accepted (and hence by inference 'acceptable'). Postings of someone's home address are not accepted or acceptable.

It's all called 'free speech', kolkore.

[The realm of email, being private, is slightly different. But at least in one respect, the 'norms', not to say the legalities, are a bit looser, *since it's not public.* So an email like the above is certainly accepted in these parts, provided there are no threats, etc.]

As to civility, Kolkore, you may be right about what happened (if your account is accurate). Many of us prefer civil exchanges and don't interact with the incivil.

See elsol, above. Indeed, in the forum I moderate, the extremes of incivility would be deleted by me, according to forum rules.

Yet that would not happen here in Author's Hangout. A grossly incivil or hateful posting is *accepted*; it stands. Hence it is 'acceptable.'

Whether people ignore or not, join in, is a different matter; but at times, people post further incivilities, pro and con, and it's a nasty, uncivilized free-for-all. That is the nature of 'free speech.'

I have no idea if such behavior is "moral", because of several things:
1) Sticks and stones.... 2) The actual effect is to discredit the flamer, more than the flamed; 3) Generally then the only effect is hurt feelings; 4) No one is forced to read insults to her or himself, flames against himself, etc. Assuming these four hold, such an incivility may well be analogous to A not inviting B to his wedding or party, or sending a note saying "Don't come, you #$%#$#!". Morals simply do not enter in.

Such behavior may be uncivil, boorish, low class, or whatever. These are arguably matters of etiquette, not morality.

 

[elsol]

1. Was I mistaken in not denying myself of what 88 other readers in that case have done (I could not predict ahead of time that I would be deleted). (Not theoretical).

Badly... worded.

Should you have posted what you did?

I can only respond for myself, I would not have.

But I would not 'offer advice' to any other writer, the ones that listen are not the worth the attitude of those who feel they are the Intelligent Design's gift to the written word.

(Not that is what occurred here... I am simply giving you another perspective.)

If I were by some miracle and lots of alcohol to offer some advice... I would ding the author to see if I could get a reaction that would tell me how he/she reacts to criticism.

Take my word for it... it's not that hard to figure out when someone is going to lite your ass on fire.

2. Was I mistaken in responding to the author’s invitation to all readers to write to him with attached e-mail address? (Not theoretical).

No.

Just don't do it again

3. Is it an expected or acceptable norm to get a hate mail in response to an invited message by authors? (I will send it to any one who wishes to review it). (Not theoretical).

It has been my experience that writers are sensitive.

They are most sensitive to the most helpful of people at that.

In this situation, you got caught because of lack of acknowledge.

If you're criticism had been about writing, it would have been easier to take... becuase it's something we have defenses againt... our ego tells us we are great, so you can go fuck yourself!



The time of criticism you offered on the details and use of crutch can be tougher to deal with... especially when we're not experts.

Usually when it happens, I incorporate the details offered into a re-write a story... after gnashing my teeth and telling you to go fuck yourself! (The last I do in my mind, of course, I'm not above using you.)

4. Is it an acceptable use of the authors' private domain to ban reader/s future comments regardless of the content i.e. preemptively? (Not theoretical)

It's not against the rules so it's up to the writers discretion.

As I stated... my discretion is to use your knowledge to avoid my research ... I'm still going to tell you to go fuck yourself in my mind though.

5. Would it be acceptable to criticize readers if he/she could not respond on the same forum? (This is NOT a hypothetical. Immediately, after I was deleted there was the author’s posting thanking the “real professionals who complimented him”…).

You have responded in a different forum... haven't you?

So the question is irrelevalent as you found a way to get back at the writer.

A very effective one... I congratulate you *clap*clap*

6. Is there any ethical limit in your minds to authors’ use of their private domain vis-a-vis readers?

In my mind... you might be useful.

It has nothing to with ethics or morality... you might be useful.

Excuse me for being crass...

"Yes, she might be fat and ugly... but she could have cute friends."

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[cloudy]

I'll try to answer your questions, as best I can, but remember, I'm just me, and just one opinion. (btw - your posts are extremely hard to read written they way they are with no paragraph breaks, etc.)

1. Was I mistaken in not denying myself of what 88 other readers in that case have done (I could not predict ahead of time that I would be deleted). (Not theoretical).

No, you have the right to leave a public comment if the author has them enabled, just like everyone else.

2. Was I mistaken in responding to the author’s invitation to all readers to write to him with attached e-mail address? (Not theoretical).

No, I don't think you were mistaken here, either. Like so many before have said, how any particular author receives even constructive criticism is as much your guess as it is mine.

3. Is it an expected or acceptable norm to get a hate mail in response to an invited message by authors? (I will send it to any one who wishes to review it). (Not theoretical).

I wouldn't send "hatemail." Maybe my readers have been very kind, I don't know, but I usually get feedback that's pretty much positive, or it's the randomly funny "you suck" kind of thing, which I laugh at, then move on - they usually aren't brave enough to attach their email address.

4. Is it an acceptable use of the authors' private domain to ban reader/s future comments regardless of the content i.e. preemptively? (Not theoretical)

Yes, absolutely. You may not like having your comments removed, but as an author, it's up to me what public comments stay and which don't. As an aside, there's not many that I have deleted, but that said, it is absolutely my right to do so.

For instance: if I could care less what people thought of what I'd written, why shouldn't it be up to me to disable comments and feedback? After all, it's my story, my hard work, right? Shouldn't I be able to delete a comment that has absolutely nothing to do with the story, but instead makes weird assumptions about my character simply because of some fiction I wrote?

FYI: an author can't "ban" anyone from commenting on their stories. S/he can disable public comments, or even anonymous feedback, but there is no way to "ban" just one person from commenting.

5. Would it be acceptable to criticize readers if he/she could not respond on the same forum? (This is NOT a hypothetical. Immediately, after I was deleted there was the author’s posting thanking the “real professionals who complimented him”…).

Yes, simply because of what I said above. Were you named specifically? Even if you were, I somehow doubt that "Kolkore" is your real name.

6. Is there any ethical limit in your minds to authors’ use of their private domain vis-a-vis readers?

No, no, no. It is the AUTHOR'S, to do with as they wish.

You may not like it, but as an author, if I was unable to delete a comment that says that I have downs syndrome (which I have gotten, believe it or not), or something else equally inane, I would stop posting my stories here altogether.

Why is this bothering you so much that you've carried it as far as you have? Just out of curiosity....

 

[thebullet]

Geez, Kolkore - I think I know kinda how you feel. This morning I left a somewhat negative comment on a story posted today. My comment was mostly: Sorry, it was supposed to be funny but it wasn't. I'm pretty sure that was the extent of my comment.

The author deleted my comment and left only positive ones.

Now that pisses me off. I was moderatly distressed by your problem, Korkore, but mine really makes me see red.

I guess it's all in the eyes of the beholder.

 

[maggot420]

I can see no flaw in Pure's logic nor did I see any insult. Even to say you were criticized would be a stretch. It looked like simple observation to me.

I would answer your questions but I think Cloudy and Elsol have already done so with more lucidity and charity than I am able to muster.