Breaking Point

[Ciceri]

Have any of you ever reached the point where you took an extended time away from the lifestyle or quit all together?

 

[Ciceri]

I am a sub and sort of a late bloomer when it comes to the lifestyle. Nine years ago I'd been having sessions with a dominant man. I think it was my third or fourth session I did not show up to his house as planned. I didn't call or text.. something came up and I blew him off. The next day I was feeling bad and showed up at his house. No one was home so I left a note. A week went by without a word so I gave him a call. He wasn't happy and told me not to call again. I was shocked so I drove to his house and he reluctantly let me in. He demanded more than an apology. He said if I'm serious, I'd accept a harsh punishment. Of course I did. He'd punished me in the first sessions and I enjoyed it. This time was different. He had me strip naked and crawl onto a big ottoman - like four by four feet in dimension. He took out a long leather strap - the type with a wooden handle. It was an 18" strap of leather. I was getting a bit nervous. The leather was stained with oil, sweat and maybe even blood. I was in for something I'd never experienced. He fitted a leather hood over my head and attached a chain from the ceiling to the top D-ring. He adjusted it as I knelt on my hands and knees. He left the room for a half hour and the anticipation was killing me. Finally he returned and started lecturing me about respect and responsibility. He said I needed a lesson in consideration and only then would he accept my apology. He asked, "How old are you?" I told him I was 41. He said, "You'll be given 41 lashes. It's obvious you never learned respect. You'll learn tonight." With that he began. I heard his feet shuffle as he swung the strap. The pain was severe. That was the sort of punishment men got on ships or in prison. He kept count. I was too distracted by the pain. We barely got to ten and I wasn't a quarter way through. By the time he got to 20 my backside was burning numb. I wasn't going to make it. But we kept going. By 30 I was hyperventilating and we took a break. He wasn't done, however. He swung the strap and finished the remaining strikes in quick succession. I passed out. I came to as he helped lift me up to unfasten the chain. He removed my hood and flattened me out. There was no doubt my buttocks were bleeding. But he'd gone from punisher to gentle caretaker as he soothed my skin with salve and told me how well I'd done. Then he handed me my clothes and a towel to wrap around my waist. It was time for me to go. I couldn't wear underwear or anything for days. My skin actually scabbed over time. Why did I put myself through this?? That was more painful than anything I'd experienced - including shingles. Was I insane? About a month later I couldn't help myself. I called Master RG up and said I wanted to try again. He accepted.

 

[BiBunny]

Yes. My former "Master"--and I use that term very loosely--was a manipulative and abusive sociopath. After that relationship ended, I took about five years off. I needed the time to regroup, honestly.

 

[Dearelliot]

Times in my life when I was working 16 hour days 7 days a week, and had no time for sex.

 

[PleasureDaddy]

I feel like I wouldn’t enjoy pushing a woman to that point. I think I’m just more of a fun spanker who can be “mean” or “rough” if specifically requested.

 

[Servileone13]

Unless you are a masochist and had stated or claimed to be prior to this, I believe he is the one who disrespected you. To answer your question yes. I have been conned, lied too, ghosted, and had experiences where the Domme was not at all as advertised (and I'm not about talking looks) Each time I stepped away for a bit. Even tried burying or denying my submissive temperament for awhile, but it always seems to awaken eventually. Trust and honesty have to be first rule in any D/s or BDSM relationship. I am not you, and I don't know your situation, but I would simply ask, do you trust him not to do that again?