impressive
Literotica Guru
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- Sep 11, 2003
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Following Shanglan's lead 
I'm posting the first few pages of a F/F reluctance story. I'd like to know if the characters are believable, if the tension works, and anything else you might think. This will be my first submission in the NonConsent/Reluctance category, and I'm a mite apprehensive about it.
TIA,
~Imp
-------------------
BOILING POINT
Time to turn up the heat
"Rapists should be castrated," Jenna said emphatically, rising as the movie credits began to scroll up the theater screen. Carly didn't respond. She was still sitting, although all the other patrons were now making their way out of the cinema.
Jenna used her hip to nudge her friend‛s shoulder, "Hey! Let's go get some dinner. I‛m famished." She was about to say more when Carly looked up. Tears were streaming down the younger woman's cheeks. Jenna immediately sat back down. "What's wrong?"
Carly shook her head, as if to banish an unwelcome thought. "He loved her," she finally sobbed.
"No. He raped her," Jenna corrected. "Big difference. I didn't want him to die, especially in such a brutal fashion, but that's the extent of my sympathy."
Carly grabbed her purse from the adjacent seat, stood, and wiped her eyes with the back of one hand. "I guess – but have you never felt that overwhelming desire to push a relationship to the next level?"
"There's pushing, and then there's rape," Jenna said, raising an eyebrow. "C'mon! You‛ll never convince me that they were ever going to be lovers, much as I'll admit they both wanted it. She just couldn't handle it."
Carly dug a tissue from her purse and said, "I disagree. I think she was right on the verge ..."
"The verge of WHAT?"
"... of embracing her true feelings," Carly finished.
"Yeah, sure. You just go on believing that. I'm going to eat. Coming?"
Carly stared at Jenna's back as she slowly followed her from the now deserted theater. She'd always follow. Never lead. To lead was to face the possibility that no one would follow, and that was one thing Carly simply could not risk – especially not where Jenna was concerned. Although it made her feel like somewhat of a groupie at times, the alternative was just too damned painful to consider.
They walked the length of the mall in silence, each mulling over the intense movie and its unexpected climax. It had seemed like a beautiful story of star-crossed would-be lovers until the very end, when the simmering passion reached the boiling point. No one could watch the chemistry between the actors and not ache for them to be together, regardless of the seemingly insurmountable barriers they faced. Carly kept reminding herself that it was only a movie, but she couldn't shake the intense sadness. It didn't have to end that way!
"How 'bout here?" Jenna asked, stopping in front of Ruby Tuesday's. "They have good margaritas."
Carly forced a wan smile. "I certainly need one."
"That's more like it!" Putting her arm around Carly's shoulders, Jenna herded her into the restaurant. "We're not gonna let a silly ol' movie ruin our evening."
A table was available immediately in the smoking section, but both women preferred to wait for a booth in non-smoking. The waitress brought each of them a margarita and said she'd be back when the booth was available. They sipped a while in silence. Finally, Jenna said, "Look. You're right. Kind of. They did belong together. They did love one another. But that doesn't excuse what he did. She said 'no' – and 'no' means 'no.'"
Carly sighed, "Another thirty seconds and she'd've been screaming 'yes.' He KNEW that – and so did she."
"Perhaps."
"Do you honestly believe he'd hurt her? No way! No fuckin' way! She wanted him every bit as badly as he wanted her! Her reluctance was totally due to circumstance, not what she really felt."
"Why is this so damned hard on you?" Jenna asked, just as the waitress returned to escort them to their booth. Carly was spared having to answer that question. If answered – and answered honestly – she feared everything would change. Once again, Jenna led the way. Following did have its perqs, Carly mused as she admired the view.
The booths were high-backed, offering a comfortable and private atmosphere. Theirs was the last in the row, across from the hallway leading to the bathrooms. A large stained-glass lamp hung over the table, its soft light reflected on the polished surface. The waitress took their order for another round of margaritas and disappeared.
Perusing the menus occupied them for a few minutes, and when conversation resumed it was rather awkward. Neither woman could let go of the subject. Jenna stuck by her position that there was no justification for the actor's behavior, whereas Carly asserted that both he and his love interest knew that the force was necessary to overcome her fears.
"Well, if her husband hadn't barged in and slit his throat, perhaps we'd know how it all played out."
"I know anyway," Carly insisted.
Jenna sighed, "You are one stubborn bitch, you know that?"
"And you love me anyway," Carly teased, trying to lighten the mood somewhat.
"Yes, I do," Jenna replied seriously and then attempted a grin. "May the saints help me!"
The waitress reappeared with their meals, and for a time they ate in silence. However, it wasn't the kind of silence that made their friendship special – the kind that was peaceful and reflective and whole. This silence was instead divisive and full of foreboding. It fed on itself, intensifying with each passing second. Just say something, Carly told herself. Anything! Break the spell. The intermittent clink of their forks punctuated the background buzz of nearby conversation.
"This is delicious," Carly finally said, although the only thing she could really taste was fear. What's happening here? she asked herself while asking Jenna if she'd like to try some.
"Sure. Thanks." Jenna took a fork full of Carly's entree and wordlessly offered her plate to reciprocate. Both women agreed that the other's food was quite tasty. Only temporarily pushed aside, the silence again fell between them – like a heavy blood velvet stage curtain. So much for conversation. When the waitress returned, they ordered coffee.
It finally got to be too much for Carly. "Look," she said. "I'm sorry. Can we reboot? Let's forget about that damned movie."
Jenna reached across the table and took Carly's hands. "Of course we can. You're the one that was fixated on it, remember? Not me." Carly's eyes welled with tears of relief. She couldn't stand being at odds with Jenna. It caused actual physical pain deep in her chest. "Please, don't cry! It's okay," Jenna assured her. "We can agree to disagree on this one."
"I thought I could, but I'm not so sure. Not about something like this. I hate that you don't understand me." Carly's shoulders slumped. "I guess I'm just not communicating very well this evening. I'm sure that if I could just articulate it, you'd understand."
"Carly, there's absolutely nothing you could say to change my mind about this."
"I don‛t believe that," Carly mumbled.
"It doesn't matter whether or not you believe it," Jenna said. "I believe it. That's what counts."
Jenna's words caused something fundamental to shift deep inside of Carly. At that point, she knew that if she didn't take the lead – and do so right NOW – she'd spend the rest of her life regretting it. Although it was completely against her non-confrontational nature, she announced, "Okay, then. If there's nothing I can say, I'm going to have to show you." She quickly moved over to the other side of the booth.
Taking Jenna's face between both her hands such that her fingertips were nearly touching at the back of Jenna's neck, Carly kissed her – very lightly at first, just a brush of lips, then more deeply. There was no mistaking the full body shiver that passed through Jenna. For a few fleeting moments, they were one. Freeze! Carly begged the universe, but before the universe could comply, Jenna pushed her away.
"What the fuck are you DOING?" she demanded.
"Demonstrating my point," Carly replied matter-of-factly, leaning in to kiss her again. Jenna tried to say something, but it was swallowed by Carly's mouth. Once more, there was a brief surrender – a brief, but blissful surrender – before Jenna reined it in and again pushed Carly away, more forcefully this time. Carly slid backwards off the vinyl-covered bench and landed on the floor.
She grinned as she dusted off her backside and returned to her side of the booth. "You can't honestly tell me you didn't want that. It would have never happened, either, if I hadn't pushed it – and it WAS undeniably incredible – and there's nothing YOU can say to convince me otherwise – and ..."
Jenna stood, her expression stoic. "And I think it's time I was getting home," she interrupted in a voice stripped of all emotion. Without another word, she headed for the door. Carly was stunned. She'd proven her point. Jenna couldn't possibly deny that.
Jenna had nearly reached the exit when she remembered that Carly drove. She stopped, turned, and slowly walked back to their booth. Her emotions were bouncing all over the place: anger, fear, excitement, grief, love, regret, desire. Their friendship was too precious to let this derail it, yet Jenna was terrified that something essential had been damaged beyond repair.
She started to speak before looking up. "Carly, I'm ...."
Carly was gone.
"If you're lookin' for your ...um ... girlfriend," the busboy said as he cleared their table, "I think she's in the ladies' room."
Apparently, at least one person had observed that kiss. "Damn!" Jenna muttered. "That's all I need." She just stood there, trying to decide what to do next – and trying desperately not to think about how Carly's lips felt against hers. When the busboy started to give her funny looks, she overcame her inertia and headed for the ladies' room. Her heart was pounding hard enough for the pulse in her neck to be visible. Time to fix this before it goes any further, she told herself.
Jenna pushed open the door to the restroom and stuck her head inside. At first glance, it appeared to be deserted. It wasn't until she stepped all the way inside that she saw Carly leaning against the wall behind the door.
"Are you okay?" Jenna asked. Whatever she expected to find, this wasn't it. Carly was eerily calm, cool, and collected.
Carly smiled – a genuine smile, eyes and all – and said, "Never been better. Ready to go?"
"Oh," Jenna replied, confused. "Um ... good. Then we can put that whatever-it-was behind us?"
"What makes you think that?" There was an unfamiliar edge to Carly's voice. "I have no intention of letting go of this now. We're too close."
Jenna opened her mouth to speak, but Carly placed a finger on her lips, silencing her.
"You know I want you ..." Carly began, staring at her finger where it rested against slightly parted lips. She could feel Jenna's breath against it.
"Carly, don't go there," Jenna implored through Carly's finger.
"... and I know you want me," Carly continued, now tracing her finger along the outline of Jenna's mouth.
"Carly, please ..." Jenna spoke sternly, but her eyes nearly fluttered closed with the powerful sensation.
"My touch feels nice, doesn't it?"
"You know it does," Jenna said, angrily pushing Carly's hand away. "But we can't. I won't." She turned and extended a visibly shaky hand toward the door handle. "I'll just call a cab."
Carly stiff-armed the door just as Jenna tried to open it. "No," she said as she leaned forward, pressing her body against Jenna's back. "You're coming with me," Carly whispered into the skin of Jenna's neck, just below her ear.
I'm posting the first few pages of a F/F reluctance story. I'd like to know if the characters are believable, if the tension works, and anything else you might think. This will be my first submission in the NonConsent/Reluctance category, and I'm a mite apprehensive about it.TIA,
~Imp
-------------------
BOILING POINT
Time to turn up the heat
"Rapists should be castrated," Jenna said emphatically, rising as the movie credits began to scroll up the theater screen. Carly didn't respond. She was still sitting, although all the other patrons were now making their way out of the cinema.
Jenna used her hip to nudge her friend‛s shoulder, "Hey! Let's go get some dinner. I‛m famished." She was about to say more when Carly looked up. Tears were streaming down the younger woman's cheeks. Jenna immediately sat back down. "What's wrong?"
Carly shook her head, as if to banish an unwelcome thought. "He loved her," she finally sobbed.
"No. He raped her," Jenna corrected. "Big difference. I didn't want him to die, especially in such a brutal fashion, but that's the extent of my sympathy."
Carly grabbed her purse from the adjacent seat, stood, and wiped her eyes with the back of one hand. "I guess – but have you never felt that overwhelming desire to push a relationship to the next level?"
"There's pushing, and then there's rape," Jenna said, raising an eyebrow. "C'mon! You‛ll never convince me that they were ever going to be lovers, much as I'll admit they both wanted it. She just couldn't handle it."
Carly dug a tissue from her purse and said, "I disagree. I think she was right on the verge ..."
"The verge of WHAT?"
"... of embracing her true feelings," Carly finished.
"Yeah, sure. You just go on believing that. I'm going to eat. Coming?"
Carly stared at Jenna's back as she slowly followed her from the now deserted theater. She'd always follow. Never lead. To lead was to face the possibility that no one would follow, and that was one thing Carly simply could not risk – especially not where Jenna was concerned. Although it made her feel like somewhat of a groupie at times, the alternative was just too damned painful to consider.
They walked the length of the mall in silence, each mulling over the intense movie and its unexpected climax. It had seemed like a beautiful story of star-crossed would-be lovers until the very end, when the simmering passion reached the boiling point. No one could watch the chemistry between the actors and not ache for them to be together, regardless of the seemingly insurmountable barriers they faced. Carly kept reminding herself that it was only a movie, but she couldn't shake the intense sadness. It didn't have to end that way!
"How 'bout here?" Jenna asked, stopping in front of Ruby Tuesday's. "They have good margaritas."
Carly forced a wan smile. "I certainly need one."
"That's more like it!" Putting her arm around Carly's shoulders, Jenna herded her into the restaurant. "We're not gonna let a silly ol' movie ruin our evening."
A table was available immediately in the smoking section, but both women preferred to wait for a booth in non-smoking. The waitress brought each of them a margarita and said she'd be back when the booth was available. They sipped a while in silence. Finally, Jenna said, "Look. You're right. Kind of. They did belong together. They did love one another. But that doesn't excuse what he did. She said 'no' – and 'no' means 'no.'"
Carly sighed, "Another thirty seconds and she'd've been screaming 'yes.' He KNEW that – and so did she."
"Perhaps."
"Do you honestly believe he'd hurt her? No way! No fuckin' way! She wanted him every bit as badly as he wanted her! Her reluctance was totally due to circumstance, not what she really felt."
"Why is this so damned hard on you?" Jenna asked, just as the waitress returned to escort them to their booth. Carly was spared having to answer that question. If answered – and answered honestly – she feared everything would change. Once again, Jenna led the way. Following did have its perqs, Carly mused as she admired the view.
The booths were high-backed, offering a comfortable and private atmosphere. Theirs was the last in the row, across from the hallway leading to the bathrooms. A large stained-glass lamp hung over the table, its soft light reflected on the polished surface. The waitress took their order for another round of margaritas and disappeared.
Perusing the menus occupied them for a few minutes, and when conversation resumed it was rather awkward. Neither woman could let go of the subject. Jenna stuck by her position that there was no justification for the actor's behavior, whereas Carly asserted that both he and his love interest knew that the force was necessary to overcome her fears.
"Well, if her husband hadn't barged in and slit his throat, perhaps we'd know how it all played out."
"I know anyway," Carly insisted.
Jenna sighed, "You are one stubborn bitch, you know that?"
"And you love me anyway," Carly teased, trying to lighten the mood somewhat.
"Yes, I do," Jenna replied seriously and then attempted a grin. "May the saints help me!"
The waitress reappeared with their meals, and for a time they ate in silence. However, it wasn't the kind of silence that made their friendship special – the kind that was peaceful and reflective and whole. This silence was instead divisive and full of foreboding. It fed on itself, intensifying with each passing second. Just say something, Carly told herself. Anything! Break the spell. The intermittent clink of their forks punctuated the background buzz of nearby conversation.
"This is delicious," Carly finally said, although the only thing she could really taste was fear. What's happening here? she asked herself while asking Jenna if she'd like to try some.
"Sure. Thanks." Jenna took a fork full of Carly's entree and wordlessly offered her plate to reciprocate. Both women agreed that the other's food was quite tasty. Only temporarily pushed aside, the silence again fell between them – like a heavy blood velvet stage curtain. So much for conversation. When the waitress returned, they ordered coffee.
It finally got to be too much for Carly. "Look," she said. "I'm sorry. Can we reboot? Let's forget about that damned movie."
Jenna reached across the table and took Carly's hands. "Of course we can. You're the one that was fixated on it, remember? Not me." Carly's eyes welled with tears of relief. She couldn't stand being at odds with Jenna. It caused actual physical pain deep in her chest. "Please, don't cry! It's okay," Jenna assured her. "We can agree to disagree on this one."
"I thought I could, but I'm not so sure. Not about something like this. I hate that you don't understand me." Carly's shoulders slumped. "I guess I'm just not communicating very well this evening. I'm sure that if I could just articulate it, you'd understand."
"Carly, there's absolutely nothing you could say to change my mind about this."
"I don‛t believe that," Carly mumbled.
"It doesn't matter whether or not you believe it," Jenna said. "I believe it. That's what counts."
Jenna's words caused something fundamental to shift deep inside of Carly. At that point, she knew that if she didn't take the lead – and do so right NOW – she'd spend the rest of her life regretting it. Although it was completely against her non-confrontational nature, she announced, "Okay, then. If there's nothing I can say, I'm going to have to show you." She quickly moved over to the other side of the booth.
Taking Jenna's face between both her hands such that her fingertips were nearly touching at the back of Jenna's neck, Carly kissed her – very lightly at first, just a brush of lips, then more deeply. There was no mistaking the full body shiver that passed through Jenna. For a few fleeting moments, they were one. Freeze! Carly begged the universe, but before the universe could comply, Jenna pushed her away.
"What the fuck are you DOING?" she demanded.
"Demonstrating my point," Carly replied matter-of-factly, leaning in to kiss her again. Jenna tried to say something, but it was swallowed by Carly's mouth. Once more, there was a brief surrender – a brief, but blissful surrender – before Jenna reined it in and again pushed Carly away, more forcefully this time. Carly slid backwards off the vinyl-covered bench and landed on the floor.
She grinned as she dusted off her backside and returned to her side of the booth. "You can't honestly tell me you didn't want that. It would have never happened, either, if I hadn't pushed it – and it WAS undeniably incredible – and there's nothing YOU can say to convince me otherwise – and ..."
Jenna stood, her expression stoic. "And I think it's time I was getting home," she interrupted in a voice stripped of all emotion. Without another word, she headed for the door. Carly was stunned. She'd proven her point. Jenna couldn't possibly deny that.
Jenna had nearly reached the exit when she remembered that Carly drove. She stopped, turned, and slowly walked back to their booth. Her emotions were bouncing all over the place: anger, fear, excitement, grief, love, regret, desire. Their friendship was too precious to let this derail it, yet Jenna was terrified that something essential had been damaged beyond repair.
She started to speak before looking up. "Carly, I'm ...."
Carly was gone.
"If you're lookin' for your ...um ... girlfriend," the busboy said as he cleared their table, "I think she's in the ladies' room."
Apparently, at least one person had observed that kiss. "Damn!" Jenna muttered. "That's all I need." She just stood there, trying to decide what to do next – and trying desperately not to think about how Carly's lips felt against hers. When the busboy started to give her funny looks, she overcame her inertia and headed for the ladies' room. Her heart was pounding hard enough for the pulse in her neck to be visible. Time to fix this before it goes any further, she told herself.
Jenna pushed open the door to the restroom and stuck her head inside. At first glance, it appeared to be deserted. It wasn't until she stepped all the way inside that she saw Carly leaning against the wall behind the door.
"Are you okay?" Jenna asked. Whatever she expected to find, this wasn't it. Carly was eerily calm, cool, and collected.
Carly smiled – a genuine smile, eyes and all – and said, "Never been better. Ready to go?"
"Oh," Jenna replied, confused. "Um ... good. Then we can put that whatever-it-was behind us?"
"What makes you think that?" There was an unfamiliar edge to Carly's voice. "I have no intention of letting go of this now. We're too close."
Jenna opened her mouth to speak, but Carly placed a finger on her lips, silencing her.
"You know I want you ..." Carly began, staring at her finger where it rested against slightly parted lips. She could feel Jenna's breath against it.
"Carly, don't go there," Jenna implored through Carly's finger.
"... and I know you want me," Carly continued, now tracing her finger along the outline of Jenna's mouth.
"Carly, please ..." Jenna spoke sternly, but her eyes nearly fluttered closed with the powerful sensation.
"My touch feels nice, doesn't it?"
"You know it does," Jenna said, angrily pushing Carly's hand away. "But we can't. I won't." She turned and extended a visibly shaky hand toward the door handle. "I'll just call a cab."
Carly stiff-armed the door just as Jenna tried to open it. "No," she said as she leaned forward, pressing her body against Jenna's back. "You're coming with me," Carly whispered into the skin of Jenna's neck, just below her ear.
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