Bitch With Me Now!

[Cheri]

Stress, doesn't it suck? I'm in it's evil clutches right at the moment and hating it. So it seems to be a good time to comtemplate all the people who've pissed me off and what I'd like to do to them (nothing unlawful here, wouldn't want to get Mistress Laurel in a bind)
1. Children - duct tape them to the carpet
2. Husband - unspeakable things at the moment that are better left undiscussed
3. Greeter at Walmart who is supposed to wipe off the wet cart for little kids - force them to wear wet clothes for hours on end
4. Pepsiman for not replacing the very old Diet Pepsi at the local store so that when I buy it and pour a glass it has that nasty 'old' taste - actually kiss his/her ass so that just maybe they would make my house part of their normal route
Your turn...

 

[Nicole]

Nope, having too much fun watching you thanks.

I'm more pissed at myself right now, you see I went to get a hair cut yesterday (nothing big I know) but I got 4 inches cut off and now I'm sad that I did something so stupid. My hair was half way down my back and I loved the fact that it was that long, but being a woman (shock horror Gasp) I decided at the point of her cutting to say Hell no take more than that off (we Started at 2 inches). Now I'm pissed at myself for doing it.

Does this count??? By the way can my son join your kids by being Duct Taped to the floor? Only joking sweetie *chasing son to choke him*

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Bitch bitch bitch whinge whinge whinge nag nag.



Ok now down to business

The olympics... why did mom and I have to wait till 5 to 11 at night to see 3 dives and/or 2 gymnastic routines

Why does petrol HAVE to cost over a dollar a litre

Why the fuck cant my fucking brother just finish his fucking house and get the fuck outta here alfuckinready

And why cant his fucking fiancee look after her fucking son for a change so I can do things like sleep and eat in peace!


Bitch bitch bitch whinge whinge whinge nag nag.


Da chef

 

[Bobtoad777]

but i dont wanna bitch momma

 

[ANiceGuy]

It's good to gripe once in a while.

Hey I like that Duct tape use!!! hehehe Did you know they did a study and found that if you used duct tape to cover a hole in duct work or tape two ducts together that it was not up to the job. The airconditioning air pressure would be too mcuh for it typically?

1) Why can't things even work for the use they are supposed to be for?

2) Why don't kids come with fast forward buttons and batteries in them you can remove so they are as quite as the dozens of dead battery toys they have scattered all over the place.

3) Why is it okay for the 38DD secretary to come to work in a dress that is so low cut you can amost see the edge of her nipples but guys can't partially open their zipper. Or show any part of their chest for that matter???

4) Why did the cop stop you for going 4.5 miles over the speed limit when 5 cars whizzed past you going 10 over the speed limit five minutes before he saw you?

5) Why does your fast food hamburger you order take ten minutes to get to you and the guy behind you who ordered the 10 burgers, 5 shakes, 12 colas and 6 muffins gets his in 2 minutes?? Did I mention that you were getting the fast food burger because you were in a rush to get back to work before the boss notices you are an hour late getting back?

 

[Never]

Don't stress be Never.

Do doh-do dooo
Do do dooo
Do do do
(Don't stress be Never)


People say you lookin' strange?
At least they don' lie to you face.
Don't stress now...

Be Never.

Da boss he says I come in late.
But all that sunshine wouldn't wait.

Don't stress now.
Be Never.
Don't stress now. (Be Never now. You'll like it much better. )

Did you gain an extra pound?
You'll jus' gain more if you get down.

Don't stress now.
Be Never.
(Or maybe one of Never's friends? )

Doooo, do do do, dooo-ooo
Ooooo.
What's this?
No, no, no. You got that all wrong.
Yes, that's much better.

Never know's the day is long.
That's why she sings her song.
Don't stress now, be Never.

Dooo, doo, doo, doooooooo
Doooooooo.
Doooooooo.
Dooo, doo, doo, dooooooo
Doooooooo -
Oooooooo

 

[teresafannin]

Why does the highway department close 2 lanes of a major highway & not have any kind of sign to warn motorists so they can exit & find another way home? 45 minutes to make a 15 minute drive home.

Why can't people read the private parking sign? I have lived in the same apartment for 13 years, all I ask is that people stay out of my parking place.

Thanks for letting me get that out, I feel so much better.

 

[CreamyLady]

Why is life so complicated? Sigh.

 

[WitchsKat]

Life is complicated because it was made that way. If life weren't complicated, well there wouldn't be stress, but there wouldn't be any fun either. It would be more boring than a lecture in Biology on a hot afternoon.

 

[CreamyLady]

WitchsKat, my dear girl, just wait until you get in the car tomorrow!!!!!

 

[WitchsKat]

Ok, I was going for anonymity, but since that has been blown......

 

[CreamyLady]

Brat! You should have changed the handle.

 

[WitchsKat]

Too Far!!! I have yet to call you names. (on a board that is)

 

[Ezzy]

Dog dog moan moan...

The people who manage to give, or at least say they can give more than 100% of anything.

The 110% ers really make me laugh, the 120% ers make laugh a little harder,etc.etc.

Math test for those afflicted with this disorder.

If I lend you $1,000, and ask for it all back how much should I get?

EZ http://smilecwm.tripod.com/cwm2/sleep.gif


ps For those confused by this issue the answer is $1,000. Or 100% of the amount I lend.

[Edited by Ezzy on 10-06-2000 at 01:19 AM]

 

[Sonora]

Let's see:

1. Conference calls that last over 1 1/2 hours and one idiot's trying to use his car phone.

2. People that can't do the simple tasks of their jobs. It's been this way for ever and ever and all of the sudden they can't do it anymore--"we didn't know".

3. The woman down the hall that thinks she's the only one in the building and just plows through the door into the hallway almost running over me three times in one morning.

4. The (same) woman down the hall's nasty fragrance (They call this stuff perfume?? Yuck).

5. The woman in my office that talks so loud that the people I'm talking on the phone with, can hear her.

6. Same woman that tells the same story to everyone she comes in contact with. 4-5 repeats a day.

7. People who activate their turn signal so late that it only blinks twice before they turn.

8. Perpetually cheery people. Come on, this is life, it can't always be that good.

9. When the grocery stops stocking a favorite item. And can't tell me *why*? 9A. When they son't stock enough of a favorite item and I either have to go everyday hoping to get there when they do have it, select a substitute, or do without.

10. Those teeny, tiny little plastic bags that you can only get 2-3 items in before they are full. What is with that??

I'll stop now, but I'm sure that I can come up with some more. lol

 

[libra-2]

People who can't or won't check spelling or grammar in their stories. Ok so typos sometimes sneak through, but who hasn't got a spell checker these days? Get a grip will you!

 

[Cheri]

Bitch on...

I feel your pain, my people! Life is not so short you can't take a second and bitch about it's absurdity! No wallowing allowed though!
Never honey, maybe doing all those drugs isn't such a good idea. lol

 

[Expertise]

People whos IQ suddenly hovers around room temperature when confronted with an ATM. No one over 55 should be allowed near one and nerve gas should be released if your transaction takes more than 90 seconds.

8 flippin minutes I stood and waited while Grandma Moses fished for her card and took a thirty second pause and peer between key strokes this morning. Jesus H. Alldancin' Christ!

 

[Guest]

 

[teresafannin]

LL,I have lots of bitches, too, but will just relate one. I have a job, most of the time I like it, but some days. Here is my current job peeve. I have to be on several conference calls a month. I am still kind of new to this postion, so I don't know all the little gossip & in-jokes between people who have been doing this for the last year. Why do they have to spend the first 15 minutes of every call doing this shit? I finally usurped a speaker phone, so I can have my hands free to do my own work.

 

[April]

Why do idiots keep calling me at stupid hours? I got a phone call this morning at 8:45, and the fucker wouldn't even talk to me! Bastard! I went back to bed.

Why does MCI keep pestering me about their rates? If I liked their rates, I would be signed up with them. Right? Get a clue!

Same thing for AT&T.

I have more things to bitch about, but can't think of them right now. That sucks.

 

[Earthmuffin]

How about people who complain it's going to be hot soon (in Spring), it's too hot now (Summer), damn it's getting cold! (Autumn) and it's too damn cold, wish it were Summer (Winter). Seasons happen. Complaining about all of them is tiresome to those of us who enjoy them!!

Oh yeah, turn signals are NOT optional. I have no freaking way of knowing where the heck you think you are going if you don't use them. I didn't take mind reading in college! Likewise, please turn them off when done, unless you truly are going around the world to the left.

Thanks loads for letting me get that off my chest.

 

[libra-2]

And another thing

Why can't I go out and mess about with my bike without the woman next door coming out every time talking to me, like I'm interested in what her stupid fucking son is doing in university!

 

[Never]

A woman said I sounded like Audrey Hepburn on the phone today.

My boss said I have wonderful follow up skills.
The weekend is here which are the slowest working days for me.

Superman's on.
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You've got me? Whose got you?!