Best of Bushisms?

shereads

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I wish I could say I'd miss this idiot, the way some of us kind of missed Dan Quayle - but I can't, because he's the reason we missed Dan Quayle. (Remember when Quayle seemed like the stupidest man in politics? Ah, sweet nostalgia! In Quayle's own words, "What a waste it is to lose one's mind, or not to have a mind. How true that is." How true indeed.)

Bushisms running on video this weekend at CNN's "Not Just Another News Show":

"Fool me once, shame on me...Fool me...can't fool me again."

"If you teach a child to read, he or her can pass a literacy test."


This one still makes me wonder WTF he was attempting to say. I know he's trying to make a point in favor of placing a cap of medical malpractice awards but...?

"Too many OBGYNs are unable to practice their love on women across this country."
 
"Al Queda terrorists never stop thinking of ways to harm this country and its people. Neither do we."
 
One observation I heard a couple of years ago is that Bush screws up when he tries to come across as sympathetic or empathetic. "I know how hard it is to put food on your family."

Get him talking tough and he never misses a syllable.
 
So much "idiot," how can you choose only one?

My favorite:

"I heard somebody say, 'Where's (Nelson) Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead. Because Saddam killed all the Mandelas."

(Mandela is still alive, thanks, Georgie)
 
One observation I heard a couple of years ago is that Bush screws up when he tries to come across as sympathetic or empathetic. "I know how hard it is to put food on your family."

Get him talking tough and he never misses a syllable.

See the post just above yours, Rob. Even when performing his tough talk, he can miss an entire brain lobe.
 
"The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the-the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice."-Washington, D.C., Oct. 27, 2003
 
So much "idiot," how can you choose only one?

My favorite:

"I heard somebody say, 'Where's (Nelson) Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead. Because Saddam killed all the Mandelas."

(Mandela is still alive, thanks, Georgie)

:D

That's a new one for me.

He's like reruns of Seinfeld: no matter how many episodes you've seen and memorized, there's always one you missed.
 
"See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don't attack each other. Free nations don't develop weapons of mass destruction."-Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003
 
"Let me start off by saying that in 2000 I said, 'Vote for me. I'm an agent of change.' In 2004, I said, 'I'm not interested in change—I want to continue as president.' Every candidate has got to say 'change.' That's what the American people expect." —Washington, D.C., March 5, 2008
 
this one's good, too:

"And so the fact that they purchased the machine meant somebody had to make the machine. And when somebody makes a machine, it means there's jobs at the machine-making place." Mesa, Arizona, May 27, 2008
 
"There ought to be limits on freedom."

~ Then-governor GWB objecting to the first "Bushisms" website.
 
this one's good, too:

"And so the fact that they purchased the machine meant somebody had to make the machine. And when somebody makes a machine, it means there's jobs at the machine-making place." Mesa, Arizona, May 27, 2008

That one seems to support Jon Stewart's assertion:

"People say Bush talks like he's stupid. I disagree. Bush talks like he thinks we're stupid. We must be."
 
"It's time for humanity to enter the solar system"

Yes, Mr. Bush! Been there, seen that! ;)
 
"And one thing we want during this war on terror is for people to feel like their life's moving on, that they're able to make a living and send their kids to college and put more money on the table."
 
This was going around on the Internet several years ago, but it's still a work of art:

MAKE THE PIE HIGHER
by George W. Bush

I think we all agree, the past is over.
This is still a dangerous world.
It's a world of madmen and uncertainty
And potential mental losses.

Rarely is the question asked
Is our children learning?
Will the highways of the Internet
Become more few?

How many hands have I shaked?
They misunderestimate me.
I am a pitbull on the pantleg of opportunity.

I know that the human being
And the fish can coexist.
Families is where our nation finds hope, where our wings take dream.
Put food on your family!
Knock down the tollbooth!
Vulcanize society!
Make the pie higher!
Make the pie higher!

And this site explains that every single phrase is a Bushism.
http://www.snopes.com/politics/bush/piehigher.asp
 
"I met an onion grower at the airport today and he said, 'You've got to help me find good people to grow onions.'"
 
I keep telling myself that the people who made that video only showed the 'funny' ones.
 
That's really kind of disheartening. I was watching this and my husband, from across the room, asked me what I was looking at. I explained, remarking that the people who made this video must have had to do some heavy cherry-picking and slanting. He said he didn't think so.
 
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