Beer Vs. Religion

[Guest]

Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion

10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

6. When you have Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.

5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over their brand of Beer.

4. You don't have to wait more than 2,000 years for a second Beer.

3. There are laws saying that Beer labels can't lie to you.

2. You can prove you have a Beer.

1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop."

 

[RenzaJones]

7 is a lie

 

[Guest]

Had to laugh at #4. Thanks, Perdita

 

[Liar]

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

Sometimes it tells me when...

 

[kellycummings]

Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion



9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.



."

Oh, I beg to differ. Beer has told me how to have sex on more than one ocassion.

 

[KenJames]

7 is a lie

How so?

 

[KenJames]

Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion

10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

6. When you have Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.

5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over their brand of Beer.

4. You don't have to wait more than 2,000 years for a second Beer.

3. There are laws saying that Beer labels can't lie to you.

2. You can prove you have a Beer.

1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop."

Someone just put the following up at work:

Give a man a beer and he wastes an hour.

Teach a man to brew and he wastes a lifetime.

I don't agree with that, incidentally.

 

[SummerMorning]

Incidentally, a fun fact:

One of the largest political parties in post-independence Poland was the Beer Drinkers' Party. It was actually the 2nd largest party in parliament after the first election, but it's lost a bit of popularity since 1992 or so... probably didn't dole out enough freebee[r]s!

 

[Svenskaflicka]

And don't forget that the stuff alcoholics throw up on you, you can wash off, but the stuff religious fanatics throw up on you, leaves a permanent stain.

 

[lewdandlicentious]

I've not even read this thread, but it's beer every time.

It makes no demands and feels good every time.

End of chat for me!!

 

[AbleOne]

Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion

10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

6. When you have Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.

5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over their brand of Beer.

4. You don't have to wait more than 2,000 years for a second Beer.

3. There are laws saying that Beer labels can't lie to you.

2. You can prove you have a Beer.

1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop."

AMEN!

 

[KenJames]

I've not even read this thread, but it's beer every time.

It makes no demands and feels good every time.

End of chat for me!!

Go ahead and read the thread. It's so much better than the "Passion" thread, which has devolved into serious bitch slapping (with Bibles, no less - that must hurt!).

 

[KenJames]

And don't forget that the stuff alcoholics throw up on you, you can wash off, but the stuff religious fanatics throw up on you, leaves a permanent stain.

Amen sister!

 

[SensualCealy]

Jon,
Imagine how many men would show up for communion if it were made up of Pringles and Beer instead of waffers and wine?

I should talk to our Minister about that, she would get a hoot out of it. Maybe for the MEN'S SUNDAY we could put out special bullitens with hymns that the music are now beer commercials with different lirics (Ode to Joy and Milk). I bet it would double the congregation at least for half the service! lol
On to bigger and better topics! lol
Cealy

 

[SlickTony]

we could put out special bullitens with hymns that the music are now beer commercials with different lirics (Ode to Joy and Milk).

Hey, it worked for John Wesley!

 

[KenJames]

Hey, it worked for John Wesley!

"A sour Godliness is the Devil's religion." - John Wesley

John Wesley certainly enjoyed his wine, but I don't remember seeing any odes to beer in the Methodist Hymnal. Do you have the hymn numbers?

 

[lewdandlicentious]

I still don't care what anyone says, Beer still wins it for me any day!!!

 

[lewdandlicentious]

I still don't care what anyone says, Beer still wins it for me any day!!!

I meant it so much, I said it twice!
__________________

 

[SlickTony]

I don't remember seeing any odes to beer in the Methodist Hymnal. Do you have the hymn numbers?

'Fraid not. He did things the other way around--he fitted his lyrics to the tunes of the drinking songs of the day. Actually, there is a good contemporary arrangement, kind of country/rock of "Amazing Love." I've sung it before.