Be part of Lit's "Bad Poets Society."

[Ham Murabi]

To enter, submit a really bad original poem.
There are no rules. Submit as many as you want, but only one a time so we don't confuse the judges. Extra points are awarded for poems that make no sense whatsoever.
All Lit members are invited to offer their opinions on which poem is the absolute worst.
Winners will be awarded the official virtual T-shirts, as well as the virtual spoon that people used to gag themselves with while reading the poems.

My first entry (and I have to say, I honestly think it's really, really bad).

"Whaaa-roooh, whaa-rooh," the wombloat cried,
The snoodle ejaculated gobs of jizz,
Two dozen men had their testicles fried,
Donkeydickhead's a shit-filled lit whiz.

 

[A Desert Rose]

yes, indeed... that is bad.

 

[Ham Murabi]

yes, indeed... that is bad.

But not as bad as this.

The empty book shelf sprang to life,
Toasted lotion made the menu,
I eat my pea soup with a knife,
Yassar Arafat married a Jew.

 

[watergirl]

There once was a girly named Sue
Wo never knew what to do
Then on a Sunday, or maybe a Monday,
She took a trip to the zoo,
saw monkeys, and said, ohh, woo hoo -
Now I know what to do, it goes up the flue!
C'mere, and give me a screw.

 

[Ham Murabi]

that's truly outstanding, in a less than mediocre kind of way. Congratulations Watergirl.

 

[medjay]

Oh pointy birds oh pointy pointy

Annoint my head annointy 'nointy!

 

[Ham Murabi]

Oh pointy birds oh pointy pointy

Annoint my head annointy 'nointy!

Magnificent in its brevity. Could Rod McKuen have done worse?

 

[watergirl]

dang, i was aiming for bad high school restroom level crap!



anvil swinging lambs
running into door jams
with cheese on their heads
forgot to take their meds.

Better? or should I say, worse?

 

[Ham Murabi]

The basketball game was shirts and skins,
The nun wiggled out of her habit,
The new model of cows come with fins,
When my SOs wide open I jab it.

 

[Ham Murabi]

dang, i was aiming for bad high school restroom level crap!



anvil swinging lambs
running into door jams
with cheese on their heads
forgot to take their meds.

Better? or should I say, worse?

Your lack of depth is quite stunning. I like it!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Ham Murabi]

The dog was purring on the floor,
The mouse barked just like a kitten,
We met the cockroach at the door,
Mom's in the bathroom shittin'.

 

[Sillyman]

And now a Black Adder moment

The German Guns.

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

Thank you.

 

[Ham Murabi]

Re: And now a Black Adder moment

The German Guns.

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

Thank you.

You're disqualified. That borders on brilliance.

 

[Ham Murabi]

Excue the poetic license, such as it is, but if GustyWind was going to enter a poem, it might go something like this.


And I hate holidays.. just hates it .

And Everyone is at home.

And the maid on Hoilday too ..

( DANG !! DANG !! for three weeks )

Gees ... Less time on lit...

 

[Phoenyx]

Doors are wooden
windows are glass.
If you like valentines day

shove it up your ass

 

[aly*]

Medjay made me spew my drink.
This is my new favorite thread, i think.
I like jackalopes.

 

[littlekateyes]

All of mine are bad, so I guess that means I am in?!

 

[watergirl]

oooh, bed, my bed,
you call my head
but i am stubborn
and will not be led.

 

[Ham Murabi]

Medjay made me spew my drink.
This is my new favorite thread, i think.
I like jackalopes.

A dazzling first effort, quite worthy of you,
And I like your AV, ya suppose we can screw?

 

[Ham Murabi]

oooh, bed, my bed,
you call my head
but i am stubborn
and will not be led.

The depth of your poetry would dazzle the average Mongoloid. Congratulations.
(We may have a finalist)

 

[Phoenyx]

oooh, bed, my bed,
you call my head
but i am stubborn
and will not be led.

THAT WAS ACTUALLY GOOD.. YOU LOSE..

 

[Ham Murabi]

THAT WAS ACTUALLY GOOD.. YOU LOSE..

But we haven't heard from judge No. 3 yet.

 

[Phoenyx]

But we haven't heard from judge No. 3 yet.

mY OTHER PERSONALITY LIKE IT AS WELL

 

[Ham Murabi]

Doors are wooden
windows are glass.
If you like valentines day

shove it up your ass

This has "contender" written all over it.

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

Beer beer beer beer
Beer beer beer beer
Beer beer beer beer
BEER