monster666
COOKIE!!
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I wonder how many people out there are S/M pervs and really get into components of BDSM play, but don't especially care for the D/s trip so much.
Anyone? Anyone?
Anyone? Anyone?
BDSM without D/s
- Thread starter monster666
- Start date
WillowPuss
serene in submission
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- May 25, 2002
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Sorry, Monster - fully into the D/s here.
Daddyslilpet
Marked And Owned
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Willow ya beat me to this one too....lol
Ditto
dixi
Ditto
dixi
luvsubbbbb
Really Experienced
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- Jun 27, 2002
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monster666 said:
oh my!!.......Ya mean to say that there are ACTUALLY some people out there who let themselves get tied up, flogged, whipped and/or tortured and are NOT then privileged to kiss the feet of their partners in thanks and appreciation afterwards?............now THAT is perverted!!
please say it ain't so, Mr. Monster!!
monster666
COOKIE!!
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Re: Re: BDSM without D/s
ROTFL...... surely there are people who just like a little rough kink once in a while. I should have known better than to ask this crowd, though.
ROTFL...... surely there are people who just like a little rough kink once in a while. I should have known better than to ask this crowd, though.
luvsubbbbb said:
oh my!!.......Ya mean to say that there are ACTUALLY some people out there who let themselves get tied up, flogged, whipped and/or tortured and are NOT then privileged to kiss the feet of their partners in thanks and appreciation afterwards?............now THAT is perverted!!
please say it ain't so, Mr. Monster!!
Rubyfruit
ripe
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- Oct 9, 2001
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I like some aspects of all of it, but not the whole ball of wax. I tried the 24/7 thing before, and I started to grow resentful of his need to control every aspect of my life.
I like being used and controlled sexually, having my hair pulled and my ass spanked as I'm being fucked, being called a good little whore and slut, etc. I love having my mouth fucked and I'm kinda getting into facials, but I'm not into calling him Master or Sir, with the exception of special play sessions. I like some bondage, some hard nipple play, but I don't like intense pain.
In short, I think of human sexuality as a sort of smorgasbord for me and my partner to pick and choose from on a nightly basis.
I like being used and controlled sexually, having my hair pulled and my ass spanked as I'm being fucked, being called a good little whore and slut, etc. I love having my mouth fucked and I'm kinda getting into facials, but I'm not into calling him Master or Sir, with the exception of special play sessions. I like some bondage, some hard nipple play, but I don't like intense pain.
In short, I think of human sexuality as a sort of smorgasbord for me and my partner to pick and choose from on a nightly basis.
monster666
COOKIE!!
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Yay!
Rubyfruit said:
Persephone36
Literotica Guru
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I like what Rubyfruit said -- about looking at it as a smorgasboard to choose from.
I can pretty much say, aside from pushing a few pain/pleasure boundaries (nipple clamps, spanking, a few things I haven't gotten around to...yet)
-- s/m just isn't me.
I know I don't have a sadistic side. And in terms of a masochistic one -- I just don't see myself being drawn to pain for pain's sake.
In terms of D/s -- oh, I'm just at the beginning of exploring that. For me -- it's solely sexual though.
I enjoy being kinky -- that I can firmly assert.
And Big Mac tends to satisfy me.
Perse
I can pretty much say, aside from pushing a few pain/pleasure boundaries (nipple clamps, spanking, a few things I haven't gotten around to...yet)
-- s/m just isn't me.I know I don't have a sadistic side. And in terms of a masochistic one -- I just don't see myself being drawn to pain for pain's sake.
In terms of D/s -- oh, I'm just at the beginning of exploring that. For me -- it's solely sexual though.
I enjoy being kinky -- that I can firmly assert.
And Big Mac tends to satisfy me.
Perse
Pure
Fiel a Verdad
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Here are a couple thoughts on 'stand alone' s/m.
I thinks there's a lot out there, esp. in two forms:
Solitary.
Anyone who clamps a nipple during masturbation, for example, is just indulging in erotic pain, or pain infliction, not dominance or submission.
Paid.
Anyone who pays a pro., for instance, to whip him, so he can get hard and be 'made' to masturbate is essentially into s/m. The whipper, the alleged domme, is simply carrying out orders and delivering pain in the requested and paid-for manner. IF the client 'gets off'-- despite perhaps his imagination of 'submitting', essentially he's gotten off on the pain and the excitement of play acting.
I thinks there's a lot out there, esp. in two forms:
Solitary.
Anyone who clamps a nipple during masturbation, for example, is just indulging in erotic pain, or pain infliction, not dominance or submission.
Paid.
Anyone who pays a pro., for instance, to whip him, so he can get hard and be 'made' to masturbate is essentially into s/m. The whipper, the alleged domme, is simply carrying out orders and delivering pain in the requested and paid-for manner. IF the client 'gets off'-- despite perhaps his imagination of 'submitting', essentially he's gotten off on the pain and the excitement of play acting.
~Dream~
Loving My Soulmate Scott
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well i prefer a "whopper" myself
cause it takes 2 hands to handle one!! lol
I very much choose the d/s over all others ,however I am very much into receiving pain so..maybe i'm a SMS? lol submissive masochistic slave? damn thats a "mouthfull ..hehe
cause it takes 2 hands to handle one!! lol
I very much choose the d/s over all others ,however I am very much into receiving pain so..maybe i'm a SMS? lol submissive masochistic slave? damn thats a "mouthfull ..hehe
DustyWolfe
Proud Transman
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I couldn't do S/M without D/s. Without D/s there is no appeal in S/M for me. I wouldn't be into S/M without D/s if that makes sense. I wouldn't let anyone that I wasn't serving touch me in that way.
redelicious
Bedroom Bottom
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monster666 said:
Well now . . .
I LOVE bondage. Yup, just love it.
S/M I really don't know about as I have never gone there before. It scares the shit out of me, but then there is this part that wonders . . .
Now, as for true 24/7 D/s, I just don't know. I am a strong person in r/l - very used to taking care of myself and really being in control. Recently I have been thinking though how just because this is the way things are does not mean that this is how they should be. I can see where the lack of D/s in everyday living has led to a lack of balence for me. I think it would take a very STRONG soul for it to work - so I still have my doubts. I tell you, it would be a challenge, but I bet the pay off would be worth it.
~*sunkyssed_kym*~
...gone...
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Dustygrrl said:
Makes purrrfect sense to me Dusty as I have the same thoughts on D/s S/M. I couldn't allow anyone to touch me that I didn't willfully submit to as my Dom.
Soron
The Evil One
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BDSM and D/s
I knew since I was a teenager that I was a Dominant in the bedroom. It was just me, and some girls I was with didn't like it so much that I HAD to be in charge all the time. This was during part of the so called 'women's lib movemnt'...yes, I am that old. But, I couldn't make them understand I agreed with equal pay for equal work and so much more. I had no clue what D/s was. All I knew was that I loved tying a girl up and blindfolding her, rendering her helpless to me. I ALWAYS thought these situations out in advance and I always got the desired effect with the ones that submited to it. Well, pretty much always.
Before 'the loving dominant' came out in 1990 or so I had no idea what a submissive was, or a Master. For my wife and I BDSM was just a fulfilling way to fuck. It was up to my imagination to come up with new ideas to advance the relationship in the bedroom. But, when we both read the 'the loving dominant' our whole relationship advanced more than I could describe to you. Now, I was her Master in the bedroom and she was my collared slut. Over the next few years it became a Dominant/submissive relationship.
Living in the real world you cannot live D/s 24/7. She couldn't come from work and fall on her knees worshipping right off the bat. I couldn't walk in the door and have the patience and self control to be her Master. But, we did do little things emotionally that help that. Taking time for yourself to get in the 'mood' was one. Or taking a shower together and working into that zone.
The marriage has been over for two years for reasons too lengthy to get into here. But, now that I have had that taste of D/s, it's what I want, it's what I crave. The whole package, BDSM and D/s.
I have known couples who go just for the kinky sex and that works for them. I have also known couples who were not into pain and pleasure but followed D/s on their own terms.
D/s, for me, takes BDSM to a whole new plane.
I knew since I was a teenager that I was a Dominant in the bedroom. It was just me, and some girls I was with didn't like it so much that I HAD to be in charge all the time. This was during part of the so called 'women's lib movemnt'...yes, I am that old. But, I couldn't make them understand I agreed with equal pay for equal work and so much more. I had no clue what D/s was. All I knew was that I loved tying a girl up and blindfolding her, rendering her helpless to me. I ALWAYS thought these situations out in advance and I always got the desired effect with the ones that submited to it. Well, pretty much always.
Before 'the loving dominant' came out in 1990 or so I had no idea what a submissive was, or a Master. For my wife and I BDSM was just a fulfilling way to fuck. It was up to my imagination to come up with new ideas to advance the relationship in the bedroom. But, when we both read the 'the loving dominant' our whole relationship advanced more than I could describe to you. Now, I was her Master in the bedroom and she was my collared slut. Over the next few years it became a Dominant/submissive relationship.
Living in the real world you cannot live D/s 24/7. She couldn't come from work and fall on her knees worshipping right off the bat. I couldn't walk in the door and have the patience and self control to be her Master. But, we did do little things emotionally that help that. Taking time for yourself to get in the 'mood' was one. Or taking a shower together and working into that zone.
The marriage has been over for two years for reasons too lengthy to get into here. But, now that I have had that taste of D/s, it's what I want, it's what I crave. The whole package, BDSM and D/s.
I have known couples who go just for the kinky sex and that works for them. I have also known couples who were not into pain and pleasure but followed D/s on their own terms.
D/s, for me, takes BDSM to a whole new plane.
Re: What would help me here
Good question! Thank you for bringing this up!
Limited experience here, so things might change as time goes by, but for this moment in time:
When I think of a D/s relationship, I think of a relationship shared between two people, one taking the Dominant role, the other taking the submissive role. For myself, I am a submissive, and need a Dominant male. (though I do have fantasies of submitting to a Dominant female at times as well) I do not think I'm capable of a 24/7 TPE. But I'm not ruling it out, either. As I said, things change.
The "look" would be total submission to my Dominant during play/scening and any sexual situation. If he has determined rituals enhance the experience, then it would be learning and doing those rituals. My submission, however, does not mean I simply back on the bed and let him do as he pleases. Well, unless I'm tied to the bed, but that's a different matter. I do expect to be an active partner - under his guidance and direction, doing what pleasese him, which then pleases me.
Outside of scening/playing and sexual situations, D/s would mean to me to be still showing him the respect he deserves by not arguing in public, not doing things that might cause embarassment, doing things to insure that his needs are met. The last part might be something he has asked me to do, or it might be things I've thought of that might make his life easier or bring pleasure to him.
In return, I would expect respect and the same consideration as regards not being embarassed in public. I would expect him to open to what I have to say, and willing to discuss any issue that comes up that might affect our relationship.
Actually, these things are just the tippy part of the iceberg for me, but I think they cover the basics.
(Well, until I read more responses, and realize I've left something out!)
Richard49 said:
Good question! Thank you for bringing this up!
Limited experience here, so things might change as time goes by, but for this moment in time:
When I think of a D/s relationship, I think of a relationship shared between two people, one taking the Dominant role, the other taking the submissive role. For myself, I am a submissive, and need a Dominant male. (though I do have fantasies of submitting to a Dominant female at times as well) I do not think I'm capable of a 24/7 TPE. But I'm not ruling it out, either. As I said, things change.
The "look" would be total submission to my Dominant during play/scening and any sexual situation. If he has determined rituals enhance the experience, then it would be learning and doing those rituals. My submission, however, does not mean I simply back on the bed and let him do as he pleases. Well, unless I'm tied to the bed, but that's a different matter. I do expect to be an active partner - under his guidance and direction, doing what pleasese him, which then pleases me.
Outside of scening/playing and sexual situations, D/s would mean to me to be still showing him the respect he deserves by not arguing in public, not doing things that might cause embarassment, doing things to insure that his needs are met. The last part might be something he has asked me to do, or it might be things I've thought of that might make his life easier or bring pleasure to him.
In return, I would expect respect and the same consideration as regards not being embarassed in public. I would expect him to open to what I have to say, and willing to discuss any issue that comes up that might affect our relationship.
Actually, these things are just the tippy part of the iceberg for me, but I think they cover the basics.
(Well, until I read more responses, and realize I've left something out!)
MissTaken
Biker Chick
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2001
- Posts
- 20,570
I would imagine that there are some who simply enjoy the S and M to get off.
However, it isn't me.
I could never be simply a pain slut.
I am always submissive. My need to give and please allows the power exchange to take place. If the play moves into S and M, it is simply because of my submissive nature.
For me, they are all intertwined.
However, it isn't me.
I could never be simply a pain slut.
I am always submissive. My need to give and please allows the power exchange to take place. If the play moves into S and M, it is simply because of my submissive nature.
For me, they are all intertwined.
