BDSM Limbo

[Despina]

Does anyone here have experience with returning to an active bdsm lifestyle after a lengthy absence? Lengthy enough for many of the constants in your life to be altered, thus changing your needs where bdsm is concerned.

Interested in all replies, but looking for some insight into the submissive experiences and possible difficulties or hang-ups upon re-entering the lifestyle.

Thanks,
~D

 

[LadyNatasha]

Does anyone here have experience with returning to an active bdsm lifestyle after a lengthy absence? Lengthy enough for many of the constants in your life to be altered, thus changing your needs where bdsm is concerned.

Interested in all replies, but looking for some insight into the submissive experiences and possible difficulties or hang-ups upon re-entering the lifestyle.

Thanks,
~D

I went nilla for a long time. When I came back to the scene everything was changed. I was always involved on a local level and while many of the 'old folks' were still there, dynamics had changed, I had changed, etc. It's kinda freaky trying to step back in w/out faltering, you have to reacquaint yourself with everyone again, etc. I also jumped to the other side of the fence and that was quite an experience too. Everyone said they didn't know why I had ever bothered 'trying' to be a sub in the first place but... anyway.

Not sure exactly what kind of responses you were looking for, hope this helps.

 

[Despina]

I went nilla for a long time. When I came back to the scene everything was changed. I was always involved on a local level and while many of the 'old folks' were still there, dynamics had changed, I had changed, etc. It's kinda freaky trying to step back in w/out faltering, you have to reacquaint yourself with everyone again, etc. I also jumped to the other side of the fence and that was quite an experience too. Everyone said they didn't know why I had ever bothered 'trying' to be a sub in the first place but... anyway.

Not sure exactly what kind of responses you were looking for, hope this helps.

Thanks for your reply, Lady. I'm interested in all responses, actually, but especially those involving the dichotomies of wanting to be involved in bdsm but not feeling as though they're in the same place in life/emotions/whatever that they were previously. The desire to submit is still there, but due to all the changes they're finding difficulties getting started again.

Changes could involve marital status, sexual orientation, career, children, future plans, relationship partners, etc...

If you don't mind me asking, what drew you back in? Was it something you resisted? Circumstantial?

~D

 

[LadyNatasha]

Thanks for your reply, Lady. I'm interested in all responses, actually, but especially those involving the dichotomies of wanting to be involved in bdsm but not feeling as though they're in the same place in life/emotions/whatever that they were previously. The desire to submit is still there, but due to all the changes they're finding difficulties getting started again.

Changes could involve marital status, sexual orientation, career, children, future plans, relationship partners, etc...

If you don't mind me asking, what drew you back in? Was it something you resisted? Circumstantial?

~D

I got tired of being a demo dolly in a dungeon and was looking for some substance. After several crappy D/s relationships over a few years, I just said screw it and hooked up with 'guys'. That lasted maybe 2 years. I kept incorporating bdsm into all my relationships anyway and would go chat w/ my friends on alt every now and again because I just couldn't stay totally away. I love the lifestyle, every facet of it. It's just me. I finally realized I was doing myself a disservice and returned to the fold. =)

 

[Neomagalie]

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