BDSM and Anal Fisting

[Mareea]

My new boyfriend is also my first Dom and we have been doing a lot of things that are new to me. For example, he has not been fucking me in the pussy at all, as he says I must first submit to him anally. Is that something common in BDSM relationships?
In the past few months he has managed to stretch my asshole considerably – he can fist me and sometimes puts a few more fingers in, although it still hurts a bit.

I am enjoying all of this and I love pleasing him, but I am a bit worried whether this might have any negative consequences in the future. Is it bad to have your asshole stretched out that much?! Will it go back to normal in time? I am already noticing it is looser than usual and even a bit of leakage. Could this get worse in the future?

 

[GuidingHand]

My new boyfriend is also my first Dom and we have been doing a lot of things that are new to me. For example, he has not been fucking me in the pussy at all, as he says I must first submit to him anally. Is that something common in BDSM relationships?
In the past few months he has managed to stretch my asshole considerably – he can fist me and sometimes puts a few more fingers in, although it still hurts a bit.

I am enjoying all of this and I love pleasing him, but I am a bit worried whether this might have any negative consequences in the future. Is it bad to have your asshole stretched out that much?! Will it go back to normal in time? I am already noticing it is looser than usual and even a bit of leakage. Could this get worse in the future?

Rapist ≠ boyfriend

Rapist = rapist

 

[Mareea]

Rapist ≠ boyfriend

Rapist = rapist

I don't really see where you're coming from, I did state that I am enjoying this and love pleasing him.

Just to clarify, I am not being forced into any of this, we are in a loving, committed relationship and he respects me. I am just new to some sexual aspects and wanted some opinions.

 

[CutieMouse]

I cant say I've seen that requirement (submit analy before being used vaginaly) used before, but if its his kink, it's his kink. And as his partner/ the fistee (submissive or not) you are responsible for your own physical (emotional, etc) health.

My bigger concern is safety. Does he know what he's doing? Do you know enough about anal fisting to protect yourself from long term damage? How often, how rough, what sorts of prep & lube are being used, etc all factor into things. How does he react to your concerns re: physical health? (BTW an excellent resource for your questions is the book Anal Pleasure & Health, easily found on Amazon.)

I'm also curious how much "anal submission" you have to go through to "earn" vaginal sex?

 

[fire_breeze]

My new boyfriend is also my first Dom and we have been doing a lot of things that are new to me. For example, he has not been fucking me in the pussy at all, as he says I must first submit to him anally. Is that something common in BDSM relationships?
In the past few months he has managed to stretch my asshole considerably – he can fist me and sometimes puts a few more fingers in, although it still hurts a bit.

I am enjoying all of this and I love pleasing him, but I am a bit worried whether this might have any negative consequences in the future. Is it bad to have your asshole stretched out that much?! Will it go back to normal in time? I am already noticing it is looser than usual and even a bit of leakage. Could this get worse in the future?

The bolded part is your body telling you to stop all anal activity.

Let me reiterate. Stop. Red. Umbrella.

If you are experiencing a bit of leakage and you have noticed that your anal muscles are a bit looser than usual, then you must absolutely, imperatively go to your doctor and have it looked at. Do not be embarrassed - docs have seen it all before, so nothing will shock them. Do NOT engage in any sexual activity until you have had your doctor give you the unequivocal 'all-clear'.

If you are worried about how your activities are affecting your health then bring it up with your dom/boyfriend. A dominant's first concern is the health and wellbeing, both physical and emotional, of her/his submissive. If your dom insists on continuing or tells you to suck it up or doesn't even express concern, then run far far far away, as this will indicate serious trouble down the road.

This is your health and your future well-being. That comes absolutely first. Pleasing your boyfriend in a D/s setting is a distant second.

As for is it common, I haven't heard of it. I wouldn't be able to say if it's common or not, but it's the first I've heard of it. And like CutieMouse, I wonder how much anal 'pleasure' you must give him before you receive some vaginal 'attention'.

 

[NightL]

just look up "rectal procidentia" - you could always try an image search as well (have to admit, I didn't do an image search)