Banned for reporting forbidden content. Fellow lit fans, beware!

Joined
Jul 2, 2023
Posts
23
I was reporting in the mod chat room someone who posted about sex with animals, and the mod there banned me. Seems like a disincentive to be a good citizen.
 
That is horrible. You report it and get a ban. Which I believe is non reversible. Meanwhile the gross chatter may not have been banned. Chat is less and less appealing now a days.
 
Yes, I was messaged four hours later.

I was banned for a comment made in the chat mod room asking a question, because, in your words, I "seemed" to be asking if I could PM someone about bestiality. In fact, someone PM'd me about it, which is why I was in the chat mod room to clarify rules.

If you were really upset about bestiality, you'd have gone after the guy that pm'd me about it.

The lesson is, do not report anyone, and certainly do not ask a mod for clarity.
 
In fairness to Quip, I am sure she does not live on Lit. BUT I would have thought another Mod would have replied sooner but I do not know how they are supposed to work.

The part that troubles me is you reported a violation and got banned, as you related the encounter. To me, that is horrible and makes me not want to use chat anymore. I rarely use it anyway.
 
Yes, I was messaged four hours later.

I was banned for a comment made in the chat mod room asking a question, because, in your words, I "seemed" to be asking if I could PM someone about bestiality. In fact, someone PM'd me about it, which is why I was in the chat mod room to clarify rules.

If you were really upset about bestiality, you'd have gone after the guy that pm'd me about it.

The lesson is, do not report anyone, and certainly do not ask a mod for clarity.
This sounds like a misunderstanding. I would encourage you to communicate with Quip or TheSunMaid via PM here on the forum side. It’s not an easy job keeping things safe here and I can see how it would look if someone was in chat asking if it’s okay to PM people about bestiality.
 
"What makes you ask?"

"BANNED."


See the difference?

"The lesson is ..." if you're unsure about whether someone else's behavior is acceptable, do NOT raise it with the mods.
 
This sounds like a misunderstanding. I would encourage you to communicate with Quip or TheSunMaid via PM here on the forum side. It’s not an easy job keeping things safe here and I can see how it would look if someone was in chat asking if it’s okay to PM people about bestiality.
I've explained repeatedly to Quip that I was politely asking in the Mod Chat room before reporting someone. Quip already knows that someone made a snap judgment, without taking a few seconds to be certain. What else is there to communicate?
 
Ah, yes. Not only am I banned for trying to report someone, but when I complain about it, the pro-ban folks pile on. Classy.

ToPleaseHim, is this why you want me to communicate more? So that jaFO gets to show how much of a jerk he can be?
 
As much entertainment the other chatters are getting from your thread until we have the name of this supposed person who pmed you about this issue and evidence of the problem this ban will stand. Also Jafo is a forum mod and in regards to the chat help forum while we appreciate any forum mods help (and they have been wonderful with questions we have had in the past) they are also chatters here like any others.

You are posting your dirty laundry on a public space and I am assuming this is not your first day on the internet..blasting your private business in public does tend to have it subject to ridicule.

Curvy is correct (thank you for that) when they say we do not live on Lit...we all have outside lives and while we try to get back to people quickly sometimes we cannot. 4 hours is nothing in regards to an answer about issues with things. Most places get back to you in 24 to 48 hours if not 3 to 5 business days so I would say 4 hours is pretty good for a turn around time.

The reason you are taking a very public tantrum is because you have been told no. You have yet to produce as far as I can see a name or any evidence of this "guy who pmed you." and you are now the one yelling at anyone who will listen and quite frankly acting like a child. So I would say Jafo is justified in returning a answer of neener neener. So at this point either give us a proper report like an adult and we will review but as it stands now both of your threads are only convincing me (the person who would actually unban you because as mentioned in the previous thread Quip is quite busy with real time) that you are capable of carrying on a civil and calm adult conversation.

I am sure you will now be hurling personal insults at me which again will not help the case of "I am an adult and i deserve to be a member of a chat on an adult sex chat site."

You still have access to the forum as we can all plainly see but..we are still waiting to see this "evidence" One would think you would have this ready when you go to report. Because we have made it quite clear when reporting we require evidence.

I would think perhaps you should take a moment to think about how you would like to proceed. My suggestion would be to contact me with your evidence but I don't hold any hope this will happen.

Have the day you deserve.

Thesunmaid Chat Admin
 
Alicia: I appreciate your frustration to a certain degree. As has been pointed out, you have not explained the issue with more detail other than you were definitely misunderstood. The issue at hand is an implicated lack of context. More context about who, what, when, where, why concerning what happened with who would help clear this up considerably. As you have noted already you do have time to do so between responses. My responses will be lagged to some degree at the moment but you can message thesunmaid as well with the requested information and we can see about addressing the issue further. Please understand that we have a not insignificant number of people who attempt to sway us with a lack if information or assure us things have been taken out of context. Due to the lively nature of chat and the issue being especially cited by the site owners as an instant ban topic, this is why you were banned. If you choose not to offer that information or cannot, I am uncertain how to help you. The assertion that we do not care about illegal issues in chat does seem contraindicated by the current thread. As mentioned previously, please contact us with any extra information at your leisure.
 
As much entertainment the other chatters are getting from your thread until we have the name of this supposed person who pmed you about this issue and evidence of the problem this ban will stand. Also Jafo is a forum mod and in regards to the chat help forum while we appreciate any forum mods help (and they have been wonderful with questions we have had in the past) they are also chatters here like any others.

You are posting your dirty laundry on a public space and I am assuming this is not your first day on the internet..blasting your private business in public does tend to have it subject to ridicule.

Curvy is correct (thank you for that) when they say we do not live on Lit...we all have outside lives and while we try to get back to people quickly sometimes we cannot. 4 hours is nothing in regards to an answer about issues with things. Most places get back to you in 24 to 48 hours if not 3 to 5 business days so I would say 4 hours is pretty good for a turn around time.

The reason you are taking a very public tantrum is because you have been told no. You have yet to produce as far as I can see a name or any evidence of this "guy who pmed you." and you are now the one yelling at anyone who will listen and quite frankly acting like a child. So I would say Jafo is justified in returning a answer of neener neener. So at this point either give us a proper report like an adult and we will review but as it stands now both of your threads are only convincing me (the person who would actually unban you because as mentioned in the previous thread Quip is quite busy with real time) that you are capable of carrying on a civil and calm adult conversation.

I am sure you will now be hurling personal insults at me which again will not help the case of "I am an adult and i deserve to be a member of a chat on an adult sex chat site."

You still have access to the forum as we can all plainly see but..we are still waiting to see this "evidence" One would think you would have this ready when you go to report. Because we have made it quite clear when reporting we require evidence.

I would think perhaps you should take a moment to think about how you would like to proceed. My suggestion would be to contact me with your evidence but I don't hold any hope this will happen.

Have the day you deserve.

Thesunmaid Chat Admin
I accept your explanation that 4 hours is a good turn around time. I apologize for complaing about that.

The reason that I am publicly complaining is that I was banned for politely asking a question in the chat mod room.

I have not yelled at anyone. As you should know, "yelling" is conveyed by typing all caps.

I have been consistently civil and calm. Calling me childish after Jafo's "neener neener" bit is rich. His initial post to me was condescending; I replied in kind.

You are quite sensitive indeed if you see personal insults here. The insults in this exchange are your suggestions that I am behaving as a child, incapable of carrying on a civil and calm adult conversation.

As you know, there is no way to give a proper report, as the evidence has disappeared. If I had known a ban was possible, I would have saved the guy's handle. (of course, if I had suspected that you'd ban me, I would not have bothered trying to report.)

Therefore, your lack of hope regarding a contact with evidence is astute. The evidence was destroyed when I was banned, so of course I'm not going to contact you with it.

Your rude final comment about my day is noted.
 
Alicia: I appreciate your frustration to a certain degree. As has been pointed out, you have not explained the issue with more detail other than you were definitely misunderstood. The issue at hand is an implicated lack of context. More context about who, what, when, where, why concerning what happened with who would help clear this up considerably. As you have noted already you do have time to do so between responses. My responses will be lagged to some degree at the moment but you can message thesunmaid as well with the requested information and we can see about addressing the issue further. Please understand that we have a not insignificant number of people who attempt to sway us with a lack if information or assure us things have been taken out of context. Due to the lively nature of chat and the issue being especially cited by the site owners as an instant ban topic, this is why you were banned. If you choose not to offer that information or cannot, I am uncertain how to help you. The assertion that we do not care about illegal issues in chat does seem contraindicated by the current thread. As mentioned previously, please contact us with any extra information at your leisure.
Quip, I appreciate this professional response. Also, I apologize for complaining about the time you needed to respond. I now realize that four hours was actually quick.

There is very little context to give. If you have the entire conversation from the mod chat room, you can see how short it was. A guy asked me in PM if I was interested in sex with dogs or horses (no idea why he picked those two animals suppose bigger penises). I was not sure about what is permitted in PM, so I went to the mod chat room to ask if this was ok. The next thing I knew, I was banned. Obviously, at that point, i had no way to recheck the guy's handle, much less get a screen shot.

As you noted earlier, my question "seemed" to suggest something, so I was banned. I had thought that a way to combat bestiality and other crap is to set up someplace like a mod chat room as a safe space, where polite questions can be raised without fear of being clobbered for phrasing something the wrong way. Other chat rooms? OK, a quick trigger might be appropriate. But a polite question in a room with two mods and no one else? A little more care seems obvious. All that banning me accomplished was to encourage me to share my experience with others who might consider asking a question or making a report.

Yes, I have no doubt whatsoever that you are stuck dealing with lots of people who claim "misunderstanding" after the fact. I do not accept that this justifies mods accusing me of "yelling," or of being "incapable" of mature, civil discourse, or mods posting "neener neener" after I respond to a condescending post in kind. Your post is professional and polite, but some of your comrades have not met that standard.

Again, I appreciate the time and effort you put into writing a polite, professional post.
Alicia: I appreciate your frustration to a certain degree. As has been pointed out, you have not explained the issue with more detail other than you were definitely misunderstood. The issue at hand is an implicated lack of context. More context about who, what, when, where, why concerning what happened with who would help clear this up considerably. As you have noted already you do have time to do so between responses. My responses will be lagged to some degree at the moment but you can message thesunmaid as well with the requested information and we can see about addressing the issue further. Please understand that we have a not insignificant number of people who attempt to sway us with a lack if information or assure us things have been taken out of context. Due to the lively nature of chat and the issue being especially cited by the site owners as an instant ban topic, this is why you were banned. If you choose not to offer that information or cannot, I am uncertain how to help you. The assertion that we do not care about illegal issues in chat does seem contraindicated by the current thread. As mentioned previously, please contact us with any extra information at your leisure.
Quip, I appreciate this professional response. Also, I apologize for complaining about the time you needed to respond. I now realize that four hours was actually quick.

There is very little context to give. If you have the entire conversation from the mod chat room, you can see how short it was. A guy asked me in PM if I was interested in sex with dogs or horses (no idea why he picked those two animals). I was not sure about what is allowed in PM, so I went to the mod chat room to ask if this was ok. The next thing I knew, I was banned. Obviously, at that point, i had no way to recheck the guy's handle, much less get a screen shot.

As you noted earlier, my question "seemed" to suggest something, so I was banned. I had thought that a way to combat bestiality and other crap is to set up someplace like a mod chat room as a safe space, where polite questions can be raised without fear of being clobbered for phrasing something the wrong way. Other chat rooms? OK, a quick trigger might be appropriate. But a polite question in a room with two mods and no one else? A little more care seems obvious. All that banning me accomplished was to encourage me to share my experience with others who might consider asking a question or making a report.

Yes, I have no doubt whatsoever that you are stuck dealing with lots of people who claim "misunderstanding" after the fact. I do not accept that this justifies mods accusing me of "yelling," or of being "incapable" of mature, civil discourse, or mods posting "neener neener" after I respond to a condescending post in kind. If you do not see rude insults in thesunmaid's post, then you and I have a major disagreement.

Again, I appreciate the time and effort you put into writing a polite, professional post.
 
This sounds like a misunderstanding. I would encourage you to communicate with Quip or TheSunMaid via PM here on the forum side. It’s not an easy job keeping things safe here and I can see how it would look if someone was in chat asking if it’s okay to PM people about bestiality.
Perhaps you've read thesunmaid's post on this thread. It doesn't sound like she thinks there's any misundestanding.
 
Perhaps you've read thesunmaid's post on this thread. It doesn't sound like she thinks there's any misundestanding.
It also doesn’t sound like you sent any screenshots or evidence of what you’re alleging. Did you take a screenshot of the PM you were reporting? (And if not, how did you intend to report it?)
 
I did not take a screenshot because I figured that there is some way for mods to get into private chats on lit, and because I don't know how to take a screenshot. I supposed that a mod would explain whatever was needed.

If I had known that being banned was a real risk, then, sure, I would have figured out how to do a screen shot.

Then again, if I had known that this was a real risk, I would not have bothered to post in the mod chat room.
 
The reason for the ban is you started off a conversation as if it was simply a"oh just inquiring about the weather."tone(this is not the actual conversation but is close enough to prove the point) The "Hi I was wondering if this (auto ban topic) is allowed so long as its in pm?" Someone replied NO! of course not! "Your reply was"But...its in pm?" It held no urgency of Holy shit this thing happened! I need to report! I feel angry I am discussing this!

As we cannot judge things by tone of voice or body language we have to take things that are said at face value and that conversation held a feeling of the expectation of "They will tell me yeah its fine so long as its not public."

Once the mods who expressed their shock and WTF tone is the only time it was mentioned that there was"someone else did it" also it is a general rule in life really if you are going to make an accusation that serious at someone you are able to prove it. As it is also well known that we do not just take someones word for it. It is also explained in the rules and the TOS of these things.

People not reading the rules is no excuse.

Also Quip is unavailable at the moment and also multiple posts of "I was banned!" and the title of this thread

Banned for reporting forbidden content. Fellow lit fans, beware!​

is that a calm and collected exclamation?

The complaint and entitlement of "How dare you not immediately answer me! and the multiple posts of you over explaining things will not change our mind. Nor will a hindsight apology. It is also common sense to not assume that the mods can see peoples pms. I like my mental health as fragile as it might be at times with out having to see peoples pms.

Sorry guys but your kinks while I will not judge if they are with in the rules some of them I don't need to see.

You have no evidence of this "guy" who pmed you. You came into the mods office with a very serious accusation and yet you cannot even give us a name. If this situation is so serious I would assume you could name the person at the very least.

So now we are done. You cannot provide proof of this happening and you got banned. We are depriving you of a free sex chat. Not oxygen or life saving medication.

I can assure you all the mods and admins talk on a regular basis..this is not an isolated incident and the person who banned you is a seasoned and long time mod and member of the site. She also asked the advice of other mods and the admins before logging the ban and we all agreed yes this is messed up and should be banned. It was not a "lets ban random people for no reason Monday." This is not simply a "I'mma ban this person because reasons!"

And no this is not a "lets all protect the other mods. Trust me we have deopped people because they fucked up big time (and we had solid evidence of this) and we could not justify them being able to have power over people any longer. In this case though...the mod did what any of us would do in the situation because they know their stuff. All of the current mods we have right now I trust not to be monsters or make "snap decisions." We got rid of the ones who did that and I personally think the chat is better for it. I am sure you disagree..and I am sorry you feel that way.

Yes at times we do ban someone discuss and then sometimes unban because the nature of chat is its fast moving and we have to ban now decide later. But your ban was discussed...it was deemed appropriate and it is remaining in place,Especially considering the nature of it and the lack of evidence. For those who are temp banned...they are not losing out on extremely vital time..they just can't talk sexy for a bit.

So we will not be discussing this any further. Also Quip is not available as he has real time that is much more important than someone not being happy about a ban that might I remind you brought up in a public space.

He has given as much time and effort to it as he is able to and now so have I. Feel free to try and justify it all you like here. But I myself walked into the office and saw your conversation and immediately was like"the hell?"

Also again....Jafo is not a chat mod nor a mod or admin for this section of the forum. He is simply an observer and comments on things he sees which is his right. He has been helpful as has ToPleaseHim in helping us guide people who have gone to the wrong part of the forum. I have not had to ask for help in their sections but I am sure if I did they would answer any questions as quickly as their real time lives allowed...even Jafo who while sarcastic I have seen him assist people when needed with professionalism and kindness. As is ToPleaseHim who has always answered anything I ask even though it might sound dumb.

(also that's OK by the way guys..we get it. You see the word help and go there. It's like an exit sign when you are trying to get out of a building. We are not upset by it and will do our best to direct you to the right place.)

So yeah while my style of things might not be as diplomatic and or well worded as Quips I think I get the point across. But to make sure there are no further misunderstandings I will be posting a thread about how evidence is needed to clear up any future misunderstandings or at the very least we can say"It's posted here." As most people use the TOS and chat rules like the Microsoft (or really any other tech TOS) scroll to the bottom and click yes.

Have a nice day
 
So now I was banned for being calm, even though you continue to complain that I was not calm enough.

I would not have been banned if I had not entered the mod chat room to mention someone who had broken the rules. Since you think that I should have gone into the chatroom saying "Holy shit!," and since you think it's fine for you to react with "the Hell?," it's bizarre to say that something much less extreme when I had been banned is not sufficiently "calm and collected."

The reason for multiple explanations is that there were multiple requests. Answering each request is known as "manners." My explanations were all short: there is not one post that was an "over explanation," just as there has not been one instance of me yelling - or one single instance of you acknowledging that you or any mod has written something inappropriate.

It's clear that you know that your last post contained a lot of nasty personal crap. I think that's why you were obnoxious about my apology: you're unable to acknowledge that you messed up, and you could not face the fact that in this one area, I showed everyone that I exceeded you.

There was nothing at all to stop you from posting something like, "sorry, without evidence, we can't reverse the ban" without the nasty accusations. Banning me permanently does not stop you from writing, "even though Jafo is a good guy, 'neener neener' was obnoxious," or, "OK, you didn't yell," or, "I recognize that you apologized for complaining about the response time," or "I overdid it when I called you childish."

If you were really serious about getting rid of the "auto ban" stuff here, you'd avoid being so obnoxious. We all know that I will be back on lit soon with a new user name. I can then either be more careful about how I report people, or, I can read insult after insult after insult, and conclude that since one of the top mods is an unambiguous jerk, that trying to report anyone is a foolish idea.
The reason for the ban is you started off a conversation as if it was simply a"oh just inquiring about the weather."tone(this is not the actual conversation but is close enough to prove the point) The "Hi I was wondering if this (auto ban topic) is allowed so long as its in pm?" Someone replied NO! of course not! "Your reply was"But...its in pm?" It held no urgency of Holy shit this thing happened! I need to report! I feel angry I am discussing this!

As we cannot judge things by tone of voice or body language we have to take things that are said at face value and that conversation held a feeling of the expectation of "They will tell me yeah its fine so long as its not public."

Once the mods who expressed their shock and WTF tone is the only time it was mentioned that there was"someone else did it" also it is a general rule in life really if you are going to make an accusation that serious at someone you are able to prove it. As it is also well known that we do not just take someones word for it. It is also explained in the rules and the TOS of these things.

People not reading the rules is no excuse.

Also Quip is unavailable at the moment and also multiple posts of "I was banned!" and the title of this thread

Banned for reporting forbidden content. Fellow lit fans, beware!​

is that a calm and collected exclamation?

The complaint and entitlement of "How dare you not immediately answer me! and the multiple posts of you over explaining things will not change our mind. Nor will a hindsight apology. It is also common sense to not assume that the mods can see peoples pms. I like my mental health as fragile as it might be at times with out having to see peoples pms.

Sorry guys but your kinks while I will not judge if they are with in the rules some of them I don't need to see.

You have no evidence of this "guy" who pmed you. You came into the mods office with a very serious accusation and yet you cannot even give us a name. If this situation is so serious I would assume you could name the person at the very least.

So now we are done. You cannot provide proof of this happening and you got banned. We are depriving you of a free sex chat. Not oxygen or life saving medication.

I can assure you all the mods and admins talk on a regular basis..this is not an isolated incident and the person who banned you is a seasoned and long time mod and member of the site. She also asked the advice of other mods and the admins before logging the ban and we all agreed yes this is messed up and should be banned. It was not a "lets ban random people for no reason Monday." This is not simply a "I'mma ban this person because reasons!"

And no this is not a "lets all protect the other mods. Trust me we have deopped people because they fucked up big time (and we had solid evidence of this) and we could not justify them being able to have power over people any longer. In this case though...the mod did what any of us would do in the situation because they know their stuff. All of the current mods we have right now I trust not to be monsters or make "snap decisions." We got rid of the ones who did that and I personally think the chat is better for it. I am sure you disagree..and I am sorry you feel that way.

Yes at times we do ban someone discuss and then sometimes unban because the nature of chat is its fast moving and we have to ban now decide later. But your ban was discussed...it was deemed appropriate and it is remaining in place,Especially considering the nature of it and the lack of evidence. For those who are temp banned...they are not losing out on extremely vital time..they just can't talk sexy for a bit.

So we will not be discussing this any further. Also Quip is not available as he has real time that is much more important than someone not being happy about a ban that might I remind you brought up in a public space.

He has given as much time and effort to it as he is able to and now so have I. Feel free to try and justify it all you like here. But I myself walked into the office and saw your conversation and immediately was like"the hell?"

Also again....Jafo is not a chat mod nor a mod or admin for this section of the forum. He is simply an observer and comments on things he sees which is his right. He has been helpful as has ToPleaseHim in helping us guide people who have gone to the wrong part of the forum. I have not had to ask for help in their sections but I am sure if I did they would answer any questions as quickly as their real time lives allowed...even Jafo who while sarcastic I have seen him assist people when needed with professionalism and kindness. As is ToPleaseHim who has always answered anything I ask even though it might sound dumb.

(also that's OK by the way guys..we get it. You see the word help and go there. It's like an exit sign when you are trying to get out of a building. We are not upset by it and will do our best to direct you to the right place.)

So yeah while my style of things might not be as diplomatic and or well worded as Quips I think I get the point across. But to make sure there are no further misunderstandings I will be posting a thread about how evidence is needed to clear up any future misunderstandings or at the very least we can say"It's posted here." As most people use the TOS and chat rules like the Microsoft (or really any other tech TOS) scroll to the bottom and click yes.

Have a nice day
I appreciate your final sentence. It makes me feel better about you.

So now I was banned for being calm, even though you continue to complain that I was not calm enough.

I would not have been banned if I had not entered the mod chat room to mention someone who had broken the rules. Since you think that I should have gone into the chatroom saying "Holy shit!," and since you think it's fine for you to react with "the hell?," it's bizarre to say that something much less extreme when I had been banned is not sufficiently "calm and collected."

The reason for multiple explanations is that there were multiple requests. Answering each request is known as "manners." My explanations were all short: there is not one post that was an "over explanation," just as there has not been one instance of me yelling - or one single instance of you acknowledging that you or any mod has written something inappropriate.

It's clear that you know that your last post contained a lot of nasty personal crap. I think that's why you were obnoxious about my apology: you find it extremely difficult to acknowledge that you messed up, and it was hard to face the fact that to match my apology, you would have to admit some wrongdoing of your own. So you chose to belittle it as best you could.

There was nothing at all to stop you from posting something like, "sorry, without evidence, we can't reverse the ban" without the nasty accusations. Banning me permanently does not stop you from writing, "even though Jafo is a good guy, 'neener neener' was obnoxious," or, "OK, you didn't yell," or, "I recognize that you apologized for complaining about the response time," or "I overdid it when I called you childish."

If you were really serious about getting rid of the "auto ban" stuff here, you'd avoid being so obnoxious. We all know that I will be back on lit soon with a new user name. I can then either be more careful about how I report people, or, after reading insult after insult after insult, I can conclude that one of the top mods is an unambiguous jerk, and that trying to report anyone is a foolish idea.

Yes, I still appreciate "have a nice day," but it's not enough to outweigh all the crap in this post.
 
Back
Top