Backwards stories

[Devon_Reese]

Some stories involve the transformation of a tomboy into a more 'girlish' role. and also the transformation of a bookworm type girl into a more social social role. I really dont understand this at all. Why cant there be stories where a fragile girl becomes a tough tomboy? Or a really popular girl becomes a bookworm? To me they are much more interesting then the other way around. Even a bookworm to a tomboy or the other way would be better then most of the stories I see involving the subject. Any thoughts on it?

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I think it's about clichés - just as you hardly ever see a Hollywood movie about a young hunk falling hard for an older, fat woman.

But I agree with you, I'd like to see such a story, too.

 

[Devon_Reese]

I understand what you mean greatly, but to me a tomboy or bookworm is so much more interesting then a fragile girl or socialite. My favorite characters are typically along them lines. So it would be a change for the worse, stories like that annoy me very much. Not that people cant write what ever they want.

 

[Chicklet]

i think it's because realistically the bookworms are more afraid and have lower self esteem than the popular girls. the stories about them becoming popular are because they're becoming "healthier" - if you have the girl that is completely confident turn into someone who hides away in the library, it's more sad than erotic.

 

[Devon_Reese]

That right there I think is a myth, they dont have to have low self esteem. I personally dont see how a bookworm going popular is any good.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

i think it's because realistically the bookworms are more afraid and have lower self esteem than the popular girls. the stories about them becoming popular are because they're becoming "healthier" - if you have the girl that is completely confident turn into someone who hides away in the library, it's more sad than erotic.

Again, Chicklet, I don't agree with you. A bookworm may be a bookworm not because he/she is hiding/suppressing his/her sexuality, but because he/she is really interested in reading.

At the same time, a popular girl may not be so healthy after all, if she's hanging on to her popularity by giving in to demands of doing sexual favours to people that she doesn't really want to have sex with.

It all depends on the situation.

 

[Chicklet]

self-esteem

well, personally, i have super-low self esteem and social anxiety so i tend to stay out of the crowds. i always felt that i associated better with the girls in the movies before they got 'popular' and i guess i thought that they felt like me.

but then, unpopular as i am/was, and as such an outcast, i am still very sexual. the popular girls just seem to me to be complete twits, and how do you turn a twit into someone who enjoys reading?

chicklet

 

[Devon_Reese]

Well dont give up on them Chicklet popular people can be cured.

 

[ronde]

I think, as chicklet said, the real problem is how to handle the necessary personality changes in the character. It is easy to imagine that a tomboy, who would be outgoing and would like the physical side of life, could decide she's also a very desirable woman, and would start behaving as such. The reverse is more difficult to achieve, because somehow, he character would have to overcome the "girly" stereotype of soft and gentle behavior. The transformation from socialite to bookworm might be easier, since "girly" does not imply a lack of intelligence.

 

[ronde]

I'm not trying to hijack, but I had to say this.

Chicklet, you have no reason for low self-esteem. I've been through your pic thread.

 

[pinklipstick]

God, my girlfriend and I just had this debate last night while under the influence.

She is: agressively outgoing, barbie doll shaped, boisterous, loud, a nonstop talker, adores drinking, loves to party party party, knows every bartender in the city, a prude

I am: quiet, subdued, a people watcher, usually prefer my pc to most people, a homebody, a hell of alot more open about sex than she is

They dynamics between us when we go out are quite entertaining. She always does the initial wave of attraction. The men stare at her chest the entire time, are extremly crude to her, and automatically assume because she has 36DD breasts and an outgoing personality that she will be easy to get into bed. This will never be the case - she will never sleep with any of them (alright, 99.9% of them, if Alec Baldwin showed up, I'm sure she would make an exception).

Often people get the definition of introverts and extroverts mixed up. Introverts get their energy by being alone, have their energy sapped by being around people. Extroverts get their energy from being around people, lose it when they are alone.

Extroverts also seem to think there is something very wrong with introverts, which is absolutely not the case. My friend is constantly saying we need to work on my self confidence. If I get any more self confidence, I'm going to explode with ego. I am an extremely self assured person, I'm just not outgoing. I'm fine with that.

So maybe bookworms mistake their lower self esteem for what really is an energy drain.

 

[Chicklet]

well, okay, so the story *could* be done. Any story *could* be done. But since I can't even picture it in my mind I'll go out on a limb here and say that *I* couldn't do it = )

As for my self esteem, it is a chemical imbalance. Same reason I get scared if I try to leave the house, which is why I write all the time. Maybe for some people it is low energy, but I think I have a pretty good ammount of energy =)

Alec Baldwin?! Urgh!

Chicklet

 

[sharriso]

The same is true for men and their stereotypes... the "Bad Boy" who always gets the girl vs the "Mr. Niceguy" who has to settle for anybody he can get.
I have been an introvert all my life and worse since I developed depression, however I have a higher sex drive than most other men I know... the problem I have faced (not now because I'm married) but in the past, is that I was too shy to even approach any women... the one's that did get to know me labeled me a Mr. Niceguy type...
My point is, it would be tough to turn the Bad Boy into Mr Niceguy.

btw... Alec Baldwin doesn't do much for me either.

 

[tenyari]

The same is true for men and their stereotypes... the "Bad Boy" who always gets the girl vs the "Mr. Niceguy" who has to settle for anybody he can get.

Had this discussion with some homegirls recently.

Below is WAY OFF TOPIC...

They mentioned that they wanted nice guys. They wanted a guy who understood women, who was romantic, poetic, and all that.

But all their men were playa's to the core.

I don't blame the men. I blame my friends. I see how they respond whenever they do meet the guy they claim is the guy of their dreams. Even if you package him in the body of a hunk, he still doesn't get any...

He's everybody's best friend. But to get laid, you have to know how to bitch-slap.

Men hate it, women hate it. But we seem programmed into the pattern.

All the guys I know who are jerks get laid like there's no tomorrow. Most of the nice guys I know tend to go months to years through dry spells until they get lucky and manage to latch onto somebody. Often as not, I have to sit around them holding my tongue cause I know their bitch is getting it on the side with one of those jerks...

Just like I hold my tongue around the nice girls who insist on dating playa's that I know are definately moving through the field...

When I confront people cause I care about them, tell them the score; they get mad and I lose friends. Even when I have proof, even when they wanted to know what I had to say, even when they asked me to find out.

One friend had to get VD before he'd believe us that his girlfriend was playing the field... they were virgins when they hooked up... we even gave him photos of her in some guys bed, he decided to believe her that she was just -hanging out-, which wasn't how the guy with the photos described it...

Human beings seem programmed to seek out bad matches. We all know what's best for us intellectually, but sexual attraction often goes for what we know is not in our best interests.



Getting ON TOPIC:

Sure you could write the story. When you do, make sure you understand the dynamic of what you're writing. If you step outside a stereotype, you need to watch yourself more, make it more real, or it can fall flat on it's face. No matter how well you do it though, you will always get somebody who gets offended at you violating their stereotype of the world. So if you write it, just accept that you will get a nasty note somewhere along the line.