Awkward Moments...

[TMNT_FAN]

Ok every board has to have at least one awkward moment thread, and I expirianced one a couple nights ago that needs to be shared, Pixie don't Gibbs slap me... I still have drain Bamage from the last time lol

Ok so, I had asked Pixie to marry me and all that jazz, we them proceded to start doing things to eachother that would make for excellent Erotica, then Pixie's phone rings and it's her mom this is the ensuing conversation:

Me: Hi mom...

J: Oh my god you're getting Married!?!

Me: Yeah, mom, Suprise?

J: Smart ass, put my daughter on the phone *gleeful laugh"

Me: She's a bit tied up right now, I'll have her call you back...

J: {Insert half an hour of gushing and wedding talk here}

_______________________________________________________

It was really really awkward and all my lovely fiance could do was try not to giggle too loudly and make taunting faces at me as I attempt to not breathe heavily into the phone. It almost killed me..

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Youre a flaky horses ass. Thats my professional opinion.

 

[TxRad]

Youre a flaky horses ass. Thats my professional opinion.

And you're just a horse's ass and that's everyone's opinion.

TMNT, Meet our local pet troll. Be careful, He has very few teeth but he can still gum you pretty bad.

 

[Handley_Page]

Ok every board has to have at least one awkward moment thread, and I expirianced one a couple nights ago that needs to be shared, Pixie don't Gibbs slap me... I still have drain Bamage from the last time lol

Ok so, I had asked Pixie to marry me and all that jazz, we them proceded to start doing things to eachother that would make for excellent Erotica, then Pixie's phone rings and it's her mom this is the ensuing conversation:

Me: Hi mom...

J: Oh my god you're getting Married!?!

Me: Yeah, mom, Suprise?

J: Smart ass, put my daughter on the phone *gleeful laugh"

Me: She's a bit tied up right now, I'll have her call you back...

J: {Insert half an hour of gushing and wedding talk here}

_________________________________________________

It was really really awkward and all my lovely fiance could do was try not to giggle too loudly and make taunting faces at me as I attempt to not breathe heavily into the phone. It almost killed me..

Next time, disconnect the phone before connecting with Pixie.
Just a thought.

 

[TMNT_FAN]

I'll have to put that on a post it note by the phone lol

 

[litfan10]

My awkward moment: I was a teenager feeling very mature (thank God I out grew that feeling!) and was buying my first condoms even though I had no idea when I would ever be using them. I get to the front of the store and discreetly slide them across the counter. Probably because she couldn't resist the opportunity the middle-aged female clerk loudly yells out "Hey {insert male name as I don't remember} could you check the price on the {very detailed description of my selection}. I turned at the sound of a gasp to find an elderly woman frowning at me.
Yup, felt reaaaal mature.

 

[djserani]

My awkward moment: I was a teenager feeling very mature (thank God I out grew that feeling!) and was buying my first condoms even though I had no idea when I would ever be using them. I get to the front of the store and discreetly slide them across the counter. Probably because she couldn't resist the opportunity the middle-aged female clerk loudly yells out "Hey {insert male name as I don't remember} could you check the price on the {very detailed description of my selection}. I turned at the sound of a gasp to find an elderly woman frowning at me.
Yup, felt reaaaal mature.

You know, honestly? I think that lady was less mature than you were. I mean, where's the maturity in going out of your way to embarrass someone like that?

 

[litfan10]

You know, honestly? I think that lady was less mature than you were. I mean, where's the maturity in going out of your way to embarrass someone like that?

Oh I agree, which is why I feel very, very immature when I go out of my way to embarrass my adult daughter or teen-age son.
But that never stops me

 

[mynameisben]

You know, honestly? I think that lady was less mature than you were. I mean, where's the maturity in going out of your way to embarrass someone like that?

This is precisely why I make my own. Glad wrap and a hose clamp, and I'm good to go.

 

[litfan10]

This is precisely why I make my own. Glad wrap and a hose clamp, and I'm good to go.

so a condom has a "guaranteed" protection success of 98% or 99% based on type of latex, and they have been known to fail.

what pray tell is the success protection rate of glad wrap?

Should we be assuming there are a lot of little Bens running around all over the place?

 

[littleblackdress50]

so a condom has a "guaranteed" protection success of 98% or 99% based on type of latex, and they have been known to fail.

what pray tell is the success protection rate of glad wrap?

Should we be assuming there are a lot of little Bens running around all over the place?

That's why BIG BEN is locked away in a tower in London. The success rate of isolation exceeds the tensile strength of plastic wrap.

 

[mynameisben]

It's been 100% so far. You might be surprised to know how many women suddenly remember they have to rush off for brain surgery or some damn thing or another while I'm tightening up the hose clamp. Women. Their memory kicks in at the damnedest times, huh?

Kids, don't try this at home.

 

[litfan10]

It's been 100% so far. You might be surprised to know how many women suddenly remember they have to rush off for brain surgery or some damn thing or another while I'm tightening up the hose clamp. Women. Their memory kicks in at the damnedest times, huh?

Kids, don't try this at home.

Okay! you go with that if it works for you!

It is true that abstinence is the only 100% guarantee no matter if by choice or by running screaming away.

 

[djserani]

Okay! you go with that if it works for you!

It is true that abstinence is the only 100% guarantee no matter if by choice or by running screaming away.

Yeah, no doubt. My first kid was conceived when I was on two forms of birth control (the pill and a condom). The second when I was on the Depo Provera shot, same as the third. The fourth time I got pregnant was the ONLY time I wasn't actively trying not to get pregnant.

 

[litfan10]

That's why BIG BEN is locked away in a tower in London. The success rate of isolation exceeds the tensile strength of plastic wrap.

Are you sure you want to tell him "Big Ben." remember what happened the last time we had a swelled head around here!

BTW Hi Dressy! long time no hear. how are the 4 articles coming (seriously, not jokingly)? And I am still holding up those 4 fingers as you haven't told me what to do with them yet! (now I am back to normal!)

 

[litfan10]

Yeah, no doubt. My first kid was conceived when I was on two forms of birth control (the pill and a condom). The second when I was on the Depo Provera shot, same as the third. The fourth time I got pregnant was the ONLY time I wasn't actively trying not to get pregnant.

Yea, I had a team of doctors tell me I was probably never going to have kids after a literal run in with a ski pole when I was a kid.
Sheesh, yeah! Tell that to my wallet full of family photos!

 

[littleblackdress50]

BTW Hi Dressy! long time no hear. how are the 4 articles coming (seriously, not jokingly)? And I am still holding up those 4 fingers as you haven't told me what to do with them yet! (now I am back to normal!)

One at the printer (I assume)
One safely off to edit
One my fingers won't seem to type anything but gibberish
One I need to research as soon as my fingers uncurl themselves from the gibberish.

This all gets so much more complicated when you take real money to write.

 

[litfan10]

One at the printer (I assume)
One safely off to edit
One my fingers won't seem to type anything but gibberish
One I need to research as soon as my fingers uncurl themselves from the gibberish.

This all gets so much more complicated when you take real money to write.

Beats taking monopoly money!

 

[Handley_Page]

That's why BIG BEN is locked away in a tower in London.

Not quite dear.
Big Ben is in Westminster and firmly secure to the ground.
And last time I looked, the Tower had no Ben therein, (but he might have been in the Secure Wing).

 

[TxRad]

Not quite dear.
Big Ben is in Westminster and firmly secure to the ground.
And last time I looked, the Tower had no Ben therein, (but he might have been in the Secure Wing).

The "Big Ben" she is referring to goes Boing, Boing, instead of Bong! Bong!