Awake? My first poetry submission

[GuidingHand]

There are times when dreams,
the incorporeal wandering,
detached tumbling sighs,
are forgotten
in an instant.

Faint echoes
coming from nowhere,
quickened breaths
lost to the stars;
a phantom desire.

The haunting surges
molten in the darkness,
From nowhere.
To nowhere.
Yet everywhere;
engorged in desire,
drowning,
delving,
a deluge in one gasp.

And yet it... trembles,
writhes warm in the darkness,
pulling,
urging,
thickness and weight,
dreams glistening in moonlight;
sweet deja vu.

When did the siren song
taste of honey?
Of lips,
of flesh,
arching,
pleading,
enrapturing?

And when did fingers tighten,
clasping and grasping,
seizing blindly,
yet finding silky heft?

Do dreams taste of sweat?

Warm, wet, urgent pleadings
Bite marks on your neck
Shuddering desire
Yours in the night.

 

[pinkcherry]

comment

I like it, very sensual and good word choices.

 

[Angeline]

I like this too. Not sure you want feedback on it. There are some things I might do a bit differently, maybe try to be less abstract in more places, but overall this is good erotica to me. There's a magical, haunting tone to it that pervades the poem. I really like that.

Welcome to the forum.