Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

[*bratcat*]

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

See, this is why we stop listening after two minutes...(although I am SO guilty of the remote control thing).

 

[lobito]

tail wagging between my legs, backing out of thread 'cause BC has us pegged as usual. Well, some of the men.

R

 

[*bratcat*]

DCL???

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

How? You insist we put our teeth away. LOL

 

[Renegade]

* Yes, that woman has "huge tits", but then so could we if you wanted to pay for them.

Told you to go in next thursday and I'll pay the people for you.

 

[Calamity Jane]

forgot one

* It is NOT babysitting if the children are yours

 

[TN_Vixen]

* Sometimes (edit= ALWAYS) foreplay is MORE than a quick squeeze of a nipple.

This is the only lesson worth learning. Learn it well, take foreplay to the greatest lengths of your imagination, and we would probably do anything you asked.

Little known fact but now you guys have no excuse.

 

[*bratcat*]

oh no...

 

[lobito]

Re: oh no...

... nibbling IS a good thing!

well... since the wife's away at University, I've got a few hours...

 

[Silverlily]

Re: forgot one

* It is NOT babysitting if the children are yours

Oh, no kidding!



WARNING - incoming rant

Even if you're the stepdad, it's not babysitting. You knew she had kids when you married her, it's a package deal, not a car with freaking options.



Thank you, I feel better

 

[Desert Amazon]

 

[miles]

Dixon Carter Lee

Two minutes?

Man, what's your secret?

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Every 20 seconds go "Uh-huh" or "Yeah" or "Well...", always pausing like you're collecting your thoughts for a big response when she's done talking. Don't worry about actually having to deliver on that response. She's not done talking.

 

[sexy-girl]

dont listen to her guys ... follow kidrock's rules

 

[*bratcat*]

Re: Re: Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: Re: Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

* Okay, you can keep the remote but leave it on a station for more than five freaking seconds or don't get annoyed when I don't want to sit down and watch you channel surf. It's really not that entertaining.

Which remote? I've got 4.

I used to think Sat/Ultimate/digital cable TV would be the cure for channel surfers as you can see what is on in the future, what the show is about, who stars in it, sometimes even the director - but as I watched my dad channel surf on his Sat TV I realized that some people never change; he never looks at the descriptions - he just changes from between his favorite channels by entering their numbers directly until he finds what he likes.

I personally spend more time with my Sat TV (Direct TV) tuned to the Progressive music channel than any other. I have it set to automatically go to Law & Order whenever that is on A&E or TNT, and Win Ben Stien's Money.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Re: Re: Re: Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

OOO, baby, THAT is the thing that pisses me off more than anything!!! And HE wonders why I leave the room!

It pisses you off more than if you're sitting watching a show you love... like, I dunno CSI and he walks into the room, switches the channel and doesn't understand why you're upset?

**Forgot to warn you there was a rant coming**

 

[Calamity Jane]

Re: Re: Re: Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

Which remote? I've got 4.

I have it set to automatically go to Law & Order whenever that is on A&E or TNT, and Win Ben Stien's Money.

You're a geek darlin.

 

[Julian]

**roflmao*

OMG - WTF? Are you all TCB? Or are we on the PDQ? Do the rules really need to s-p-e-l-l-e-d out, or are we all FU'ed?



Smile & be safe all.


Julian

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

* Grow up and quit trying to "outwit" each other.

But that's no fun!

* When we ask if we look good, we aren't asking for you to say, "whatever"...all we really need to know is that our zippers are done up, etc.

The correct response is to turn your head, look her up and down with intensity, and then say "beautiful as always honey" - then go back to channel surfing.

Remember guys - You have to look and look with interest (even if it is feigned); keeping your eyes glued to the set while mumbling the correct response is not enough. Extra points if you shut off the TV or put down your reading material and beer, get up, hold her hand and twirl her around, then kiss her and say "beautiful as always honey". You might even get dragged to the bedroom and raped if you do it right.

* Watching golf on TV puts us to sleep.

Playing golf puts me to sleep, much less watching it.

 

[*bratcat*]

OMG!! A man who actually gets it!

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Attention Lit Men...Learn and Apply the following rules...

You're a geek darlin.

You've got me pegged, but it isn't due to the remotes; one came with each component - one for the TV, one for the Sat RX, one for the VCR and one for the audio amplifier/controller. Since they are all hooked together, and since some don't control the others (despite the fact that they are supposed to) I need them all.

The VCR will probably go away when I get a digital video recorder (like Ultimate TV) and I hardly use it anyway. I mostly use the Sat RX remote and it used to control the TV too until I got a larger TV monitor.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: OMG!! A man who actually gets it!

or are you just humoring me?

Not at all. Hey - I've got an ex-wife; I know how not to do it - the trick was learning how to do it correctly.

 

[swtbethie]

wouldn't a beter title for the thread be

Attention ALL MEN...Learn and Apply the following rules...