Asking out a stranger...

[cito]

Well its been around 2 years now since my last serious relationship - up until now its been on and off with different people from night clubs, pubs etc. Haven't found someone to really connect with, but I wasn't really looking either.

I moved into a new house in a new state, completely new to me and I've found a very attractive & friendly woman who works up at the grocery store just near me. I'd love to ask her out, but I've never approached someone I never knew, with the intention of asking them out. We don't speak a lot when we see each other, so it could easily back-fire on me, but I'm willing to take a chance.

All relationships up to date... well there's only really been one (2 years ago) which was formed from a friendship, can't really call what I've had with others since then, relationships - but to my point, I've really never had to ask a woman out before. Its either just 'happened' or its been induced by alcohol.

Looking for some help here as to the best way to go about it, I figured I would just say hello, then ask her if she would be interested in catching a movie or something (I'm not up to fine dining yet :Þ) - is this too corny or what? I'm not into throwing out pickup lines - I can't stand them, is getting 'straight to the point' good enough?

Thanks for any help gents & ladies!

 

[alexandraaah]

I'm willing to take a chance.

Looking for some help here as to the best way to go about it, I figured I would just say hello, then ask her if she would be interested in catching a movie or something (I'm not up to fine dining yet :Þ) - is this too corny or what? I'm not into throwing out pickup lines - I can't stand them, is getting 'straight to the point' good enough?

Thanks for any help gents & ladies!

Sounds perfect!

 

[MR.GGG]

It's been almost 2 years for me too so I know how you feel. My "excuse" for being single was / is medical. Rejoining the human race (dating etc ) is harder than many think or may expect.

For what it's worth...IMHO...hang out, go to the grocery where she works. Drop in often and be super friendly. If she shows any interest ask her if she has a SO. Worse thing is to think you're developing a relationship only to find out she's happily married with a brood.

If everything is clear the ONLY thing to do is ask her out. Tell her you like to see a movie with her or go out for dinner some evening...would she like that?
If you get a positive response then follow up. Communicate. That's the # ONE problem women say we have....not communicating. Tell her that you enjoy her company etc. Don't come on too strong but if she is what you are looking for (and she isn't falling asleep when you're talking, throwing up or desperately waving for a cab) then make sure she knows how much you value her friendship (and more).

I don't know how old you are but I'm late 40's and women seem to fall into catagories. Desperate. Horny. Vengeful. Picky and just plain Psycho. The desperadoes are alone, they see their old age approaching and maybe the finances aren't all that great and they act like lampreys. The Horny ones? Hey nothing wrong with that but know from the start you are NOTHINg more than another cock to ride for a night or two. Easy to fall for one of them because they are HORNY but they run like terrified antelopes as soon as you get mushy on them. Vengeful...nasty divorce(s) and ALL they want to talk about is how they have been fucked by their lyin cheatin beatin men all their lives. Their mission in life is to make their X hubby(ies) as miserbale as she or her lawyers can manage. Picky? Even though many of them are less than perfect themselves, they seem to think ONLY Mel Gibsons with Arnold Schwartsennegger bodies, Bill Gates' bank account and Steven Hawkings' mind need apply. For what it's worth...unmarried TEACHERS are the worst.
Many of them are opinionated ditch pigs, think they are perfection personified and KNOW everything. Psychos seem to fall close to the later. They latch on and won't let go...like the lampreys. They are horny but only if there is an alterior motive or reason. Let them think that you aren't committed to them as strongly as she is to you and the Vengeful kicks in. With Picky - like teachers - if you have a differing opinion on something (like politics - it seems they are ALL far left socialists and I mean ALL) she will act like you bitch slapped her during the first date. Independant thought is NOT tolerated. Some lawyers are like that too but most of them just like a good arguement (and then the handcuff thing later - but I digress) .

To be fair. Somewhere in that mass of quivering female humanity is the rare and shy creature who for what ever reason finds herself alone. She is normal, knows her limitations, realizes NOBODY is perfect, has kept herself in fairly good shape, is horny sometimes, realizes living in the past with hate and revenge on her mind is counter to any possibility for future happines and doesn't need lithium and Prozac to get thru the day or night. They are rare but, I believe, well worth the search. Good luck.

 

[cito]

Hey, thanks for the fast replies guys!

I'm only 21 so I don't have the problems you're coming across Mr GGG.

She appears to be around the same age - I keep trying to find excuses to go up to the shop, not sure when I will ask her but I guess I really should try and talk to her a bit more first.

 

[dreamer]

I don't know how old you are but I'm late 40's and women seem to fall into catagories. Desperate. Horny. Vengeful. Picky and just plain Psycho.

What the fuck is wrong with you??? In my, what happens to be correct opinion, there is nothing on this earth I enjoy as much as women.

Why don't you work on that 'spot' between your ears?

Come back when you're ready to join humanity.

 

[littlekateyes]

women seem to fall into catagories. Desperate. Horny. Vengeful. Picky and just plain Psycho. [/B]

I am sorry to inform you, but we do not fall into these catagories.


cito, good luck and I hope everything works out well.

 

[Quimmy]

Well its been around 2 years now since my last serious relationship - up until now its been on and off with different people from night clubs, pubs etc. Haven't found someone to really connect with, but I wasn't really looking either.

I moved into a new house in a new state, completely new to me and I've found a very attractive & friendly woman who works up at the grocery store just near me. I'd love to ask her out, but I've never approached someone I never knew, with the intention of asking them out. We don't speak a lot when we see each other, so it could easily back-fire on me, but I'm willing to take a chance.

All relationships up to date... well there's only really been one (2 years ago) which was formed from a friendship, can't really call what I've had with others since then, relationships - but to my point, I've really never had to ask a woman out before. Its either just 'happened' or its been induced by alcohol.

Looking for some help here as to the best way to go about it, I figured I would just say hello, then ask her if she would be interested in catching a movie or something (I'm not up to fine dining yet :Þ) - is this too corny or what? I'm not into throwing out pickup lines - I can't stand them, is getting 'straight to the point' good enough?

Thanks for any help gents & ladies!

I'm in a similar position. Or I was.

Like they said, you should try to communicate a bit more. Maybe more eye contact, even, to begin with. Talk a bit, introduce yourself, and get her name. That's a great start.

Then next time you see her, call her by name, and talk some more. If you can get an idea of her relationship status and her taste in dates, you'll feel much more confident asking her out.

I met a Chinese girl at work, who I talked to everyday on the bus. Then suddenly the topic of the city's casino came up, and I asked her if she wanted to go sometime. We had a great time. And no stress on my part from the asking, since it flowed right into our conversation!

 

[cito]

Eye contact was what drew me to her in the first place We share a lot of it...

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

Just go for it

" Hey I love your eyes and really enjoy talking with you. Would you care to go out to dinner with me?"

There you have it straight to the point!

Good luck and let us know how it goes!

Holden

 

[lovetoread]

Re: Just go for it

" Hey I love your eyes and really enjoy talking with you. Would you care to go out to dinner with me?"

Thats a lovely way to ask.

Good luck.

 

[someplace]

Holden has such a way about him.

 

[alumbloom]

dont make it all too obvious....dont march in there and introduce yourself and ask her what her favourite colour is?

The best way to get things rolling is to openly and friendly compliment her on something...something she is wearing or her hair or whatever...something you genuinely like.....and leave it at that. plenty of eye contact and warm smiles...but nothing too scary.

Go again - not like, 10 minutes later...but when you need to and make it natural...youve broken the ice because she is comfortable with you now that she knows you admire her for something....make small talk and watch her open up and then ask her her name...get talking...youre new to the area and blah blah

take it very easy and dont come across as too ..you know...fake or desperate...dont go in there drooling and dressed like youre going out for a slap up meal rather than buying groceries....making it as natural and as carefully evolved as you can will benefit in the long run because you wont have any reason to slip up and become a fool.

get that out of the way then you can focus on pumping a gusher in her mouth!!

 

[coffeecake5]

the best way, in my opinion, is to ask her out for coffee. you're not going to get to know her in a movie, unless you're a bad movie-goer and talk the whole time. coffee is good because if she turns out to be a complete idiot, you can just leave after coffee, but if you like her, then you can follow it up with something else.