Art of the Understatement

[shereads]

"This kind of thing doesn't normally happen here."

~ Resident of Fort Myers, Florida, commenting on this week's discovery of "bones belonging to at least 8 human skeletons" near downtown.

 

[Guest]

"This kind of thing doesn't normally happen here."

~ Resident of Fort Myers, Florida, commenting on this week's discovery of "bones belonging to at least 8 human skeletons" near downtown.

This usually happens in Boca.

 

[TE999]

This usually happens in Boca.

Or St. Petersburg.

 

[shereads]

This usually happens in Boca.

Exactly.

Fort Myers is one of the last bastions of another Florida; the one where an ordinary murder can make headlines.

Here in Southeast Florida, the Miami Vice era set a higher standard for headline-worthy killings. If your body parts are all found in the same dumpster, you'll probably merit a mention on the 6:00 news but they'll refer you to the station's website for details.

When I first moved here, the "Miami River Cops" were big news. (Killed coke dealers to steal the goods). They were overshadowed by the news of a double murder in which an Area Millionaire and his girlfriend were found in several barrels in a canal somewhere. Both had been subjected to - how can I put this delicately? - low-tech dentistry, among other things, while guests of a warehouse owner in - you guessed it - Boca Raton!

I tuned out the story after the first mention of the word "pliars."

 

[Fuzzy_Peach]

I recall reading that line. Since there was no detailed attribution presented in the story, I assumed the response was invented by the reporter for comic relief.

-fuzzy

 

[john-the-author]

"I don't know; he's never done anything like that before. He's usually real nice!"
-- quote from miscellaneous trailer trash idiot owners of the pit bulls in any of the last dozen pit bull attacks.

 

[NoJo]

I'm okay at understatement.