Armed Robbery 101. Basics of a time honored profession.

[Sparky Kronkite]

Please see attached -

 

[modest mouse]

Apparently you were robbed of your attachment.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Here it is I think.

I think it is here - yeah.

Hmm? Sorry - My Word documents on this lap-top don't want to cut and paste to Literotica and I don't know why.

Yet.

sorry

 

[Renegade]

This has to be one of the shortest classes I've ever attended.

 

[Problem Child]

Sparky's computer science class is next.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Trying again.

Armed Robbery 101. The basics of a profession.

The philosophy: To augment your regular day-job income via one of the oldest professions in the world. This is not a rich mans scam. Nobody ever got rich robbing people or small businesses of relatively small amounts of cash. Remember that and don’t get greedy. Greed will complicate things and get you caught. Keep it simple stupid – it ain’t brain surgery.

Tools –

Dark wool cap
Sunglasses, medium tint
A mask, any good, simple, facial area only, rubber band round the back type
Flesh colored surgical gloves
Jacket; loose fitting, reversible with preferably a bright side and a dark side
Small black backpack, just large enough to hold your disguise, gun and money
Jeans, black
Shoes, black tennis shoes
Handgun and ammo

General Rules of the Profession –

Operate solo, alone, no partners of any kind. Keep this profession a secret from everyone – even you lover(s). Any partner of any type is potentially a partner for the cops. No partners, total secrecy. Get it? Or get caught.

Always perform a robbery at night. Low light means less sight.

Always case the potential target prior to the robbery. Check out escape routes, rear doors, the number of employees, the lighting, everything that might impede or help you succeed in you endeavor. Try to pick a business with as few employees as possible, controlling a bunch of victims is always hard. Don’t risk it.

Always keep calm, cool and collected. Instilling fear in your victim is the key to your success. If you are not confident it will show. You can’t show fear - when it is your victim who is the one who needs to show fear.

Show your gun but don’t flash it around, keep it low and near your pocket so you can return it there quickly if necessary.

Your gun is for threatening purposes only! Never discharge your weapon. It only draws attention and in the event you ever do get caught – it will only makes things much worse for you in court. If you victim insists on being John Wayne (hardly anyone ever will) let them – leave. Don’t fire your weapon – ever. It’s a prop.

Keep your eyes and ears open. For obvious reasons. Hear those sirens?

Never spend more than 3 minutes in a robbery. Leave it all if need be – 3 minutes tops – less time is of course better.

More Detailed Information –

Pick a drop spot. Before the robbery of course - because within seconds after your robbery is committed, you will need to “drop” (or hide, if you will) your disguise, your gun, and your loot (in that black backpack you carry out of sight, under your loose fitting jacket) – to be picked up later. You need to have all hard evidence of the crime totally removed from yourself, nearly immediately after the robbery – for obvious reasons. Pick a good drop spot where the Homeless won’t find it or the garbage man won’t collect it. You’ll collect it within an hour of so – after the robbery.

Have your half-mask, your face area only mask – on top of your head – under your stocking cap. Before you enter the establishment to be robbed – pull off your cap, slide the mask into place and replace your cap. Put on your sunglasses.

Try just showing your gun a little bit. Pull it out of your pocket and display it low yet clearly to your victim. Put it back in your pocket but indicate that it’s pointing from inside your pocket. Only pull it out again if necessary.

Give directions in your best fake accent. It does not matter what it is – you simply have to sound different that you actually do in real life.

Only take $20’s and above. Time is of the essence. Take the big stuff and go. Don’t waste time.

Exit watching your victim. Never turn your back on them. Once out the door – don’t run! Running attracts attention. Walk swiftly. Once out of sight and around a corner for instance take all the evidence – the loot, your gun, and your disguise – and put them in your backpack. Reverse your jacket. Hide your backpack in your pre-planned drop spot. Then? Keep walking.

Return to the scene of the crime. Stake it out from across the street. Walk by the place. Watch the police show up. Wait. Watch the police leave.

Retrieve your backpack.

You are clear now. Enjoy a six pack. You’ve earned it.

By Sparky Kronkite

[I'm pissed. Tell me oh all knowing Puter Wiz's out there - why oh why - when I've cut/copy and pasted from various years of Word to Literotica before, hundreds of times in fact - that all of a sudden fron this lap-top it won't - but it will if I use Control V - something that is totally new to me and just shown to me? I've never needed Control V before because I have always cut and pasted via Edit. How fucking frustrating can this shit be? Control V? Now I can cut and paste with Control V and can't via the Edit pull down? Why? What the fuck happened? I don't understand.]

 

[plasticman33]

Great Sparky!!

Just in time for Christmas!

 

[Cheyenne]

Sparky, I hope you're not considering going back to your old profession. A job hunt is much easier, really.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

I'm going to try it the old way again - just for fun.

It won't work.

Apparently, even though I am creating documents and saving them in Word 2000 (I think it's 2000) they are not saving as the correct type of files jpg etc. Even when I go to "save as" for a particular doccument - there are no choices for those types of files. I have run accross a window that says something like "2000 isn't installed yet - where's the disk?" But now I can't seem to find that window - I now have the disk. I don't know how only part of Word 2000 would become uninstalled but apparently it has. And why would Control V over ride the files types and allow me to essentially cut and past?

still confused.

 

[Marxist]

this is pretty funny stuff. bump

 

[Jean Val Jean]

Is this the small, personal startup business

you decided upon?

Reminds me of my favorite bumper sticker:

Don't steal.
The Government hates the competition.