Are Female Doms a Myth?

[Guilan]

The title is partly to catch one's eye, partly true. pardon my putting alot into point form, I'm nervous, and when I get nervous and confused I put things as best I can, which usually brings it back to point form.

1. I'm new to being a sub. Only recently did I get over some of my "upbringing" and realized being a sub is not something to be ashamed of.

2. I have now accepted that my personality and my desires are to be a submissive, and I have a strong desire to find someone I can trust, and be their pet. I have considered a slave master relationship, but for now wish to start off with a simple dom/sub relationship, and work from there.

3. I may not have accepted being a sub till recently, but I have kept an eye on many online forums concerning subs and doms. I've been a bit vague on how long I have been a sub; it has not been long though I have had the feelings quite a while, and so had looked a little into talking with doms, back when I thought it was a "sin".

4. I keep seeing an odd trend. I see males looking for submissive females, and females looking for dominant males. I'm having a very hard time, as I am a 18 (19 in early august) year old male, who is a sub. I cannot for the life of me find a dom that is female. I'm not saying I have any specific against male doms, but I am looking for a dominant female to introduce me to the lifestyle, and be my first "Mistress/Master". age is not a big issue to me, though the late 40's to 50's is getting a bit up there. (now please don't stop you from replying if you are an older woman, I would still love to hear from you)

5. Due to my lack of success in finding a dom, or in even being able to find a place where I can see a notable female dom population, I am posting here in the personals.

Bottom line, I'm a 18 year old male submissive who can't for the life of him find a female dominant, even to just talk with and learn from. However I would like to start a relationship (be it friends or more, or start as friends and eventually work into more) with a female dominant. I don't have many preferences, besides a good personality, trustworthiness, self control (I must be able to trust that you will take care of me, even while dominating me). I am currently residing in Alberta Canada, but am working on getting a one year work and student visa. if I can get that, I will be moving to washington state (near seattle). I would ask that if you are serious about considering a possibly real relationship, that you live near seattle, or be able to get to that area easily. However I am not opposed to merely talking with doms in other areas, and would welcome a response from anyone.

oh, and if anyone feels like offering advice for cleaning up my post, feel free to do so. when I am tired and a bit unsure of myself as I am right now, I don't write the best. Please be patient, and know I am willing to listen to any and all advice.

 

[Ksb]

Good luck with your search - i'm submissive, i just dropped in out me curiosity. There are female doms out there, plenty of them, and i'm sure you'll find the right one with some patience. You also have two 2's

 

[Guilan]

thank you. i was beginning to get worried no one would even glance at this, let alone post. I was a bit scatter brained at the time when I wrote it, so again i apologize for my mistakes and my poor writing.

will edit that second 2 out

 

[11kestrels]

The title is partly to catch one's eye, partly true. pardon my putting alot into point form, I'm nervous, and when I get nervous and confused I put things as best I can, which usually brings it back to point form.

1. I'm new to being a sub. Only recently did I get over some of my "upbringing" and realized being a sub is not something to be ashamed of.

2. I have now accepted that my personality and my desires are to be a submissive, and I have a strong desire to find someone I can trust, and be their pet. I have considered a slave master relationship, but for now wish to start off with a simple dom/sub relationship, and work from there.

3. I may not have accepted being a sub till recently, but I have kept an eye on many online forums concerning subs and doms. I've been a bit vague on how long I have been a sub; it has not been long though I have had the feelings quite a while, and so had looked a little into talking with doms, back when I thought it was a "sin".

4. I keep seeing an odd trend. I see males looking for submissive females, and females looking for dominant males. I'm having a very hard time, as I am a 18 (19 in early august) year old male, who is a sub. I cannot for the life of me find a dom that is female. I'm not saying I have any specific against male doms, but I am looking for a dominant female to introduce me to the lifestyle, and be my first "Mistress/Master". age is not a big issue to me, though the late 40's to 50's is getting a bit up there. (now please don't stop you from replying if you are an older woman, I would still love to hear from you)

5. Due to my lack of success in finding a dom, or in even being able to find a place where I can see a notable female dom population, I am posting here in the personals.

Bottom line, I'm a 18 year old male submissive who can't for the life of him find a female dominant, even to just talk with and learn from. However I would like to start a relationship (be it friends or more, or start as friends and eventually work into more) with a female dominant. I don't have many preferences, besides a good personality, trustworthiness, self control (I must be able to trust that you will take care of me, even while dominating me). I am currently residing in Alberta Canada, but am working on getting a one year work and student visa. if I can get that, I will be moving to washington state (near seattle). I would ask that if you are serious about considering a possibly real relationship, that you live near seattle, or be able to get to that area easily. However I am not opposed to merely talking with doms in other areas, and would welcome a response from anyone.

oh, and if anyone feels like offering advice for cleaning up my post, feel free to do so. when I am tired and a bit unsure of myself as I am right now, I don't write the best. Please be patient, and know I am willing to listen to any and all advice.

Good luck in your quest. I am a switch who would love nothing better than to find a nice Dominatrix who would enslave me, train me, and love me. It seems they're hard to find unless you pay for one. There are plenty advertised for hire. But finding one who's looking for a loyal submissive male for her very own is near impossible it seems.

 

[Guilan]

mmhm. thats why i started the thread. I'm searching for one, and it might help others who are in the same position as me.

 

[Guilan]

And thank you for the well wishes

 

[DarkSteven]

Guilan, your biggest problem is numbers. Too many male subs for too few Dommes.

That said, you express yourself well and don't try to come across as someone other than who you are, unlike some Dom wannabees.

I suggest going to the BDSM Chat forum and posting questions and answers. If someone catches your eye there, or vice versa, you'll have some inkling of their personality through posts.

Best of luck.

 

[Guilan]

thank you. I have actually recieved a few responses agreeing with what you said, that there are too many of us, and too few female dommes. I'm really seeing it, but am still searching and hoping this thread helps. I will let you know if anything solid ever comes from it, as you will hear me post happily

I wanted to say thanks for all the well wishes, and the luck wished apon me, I appreicate it all

 

[Guilan]

Well, I had a few replies, mainly from some subs offering advice, and if I remember right a dom or two offering advice even if they were not free nor near me. I wanted to say thank you for all those who responded, and to make a few new comments.

firstly, I am no longer moving to washington, I am instead staying in Alberta, Canada.

secondly I did recieve a reply from a dom up in my province, though unfortunately I have not heard back from her in reply to my last message, and am keeping my options open, so figured I would post again here.

thats all for now,

 

[Hotat21]

Oh honey, if I was into guys, you sound like a nice little slut to use.

 

[Guilan]

*chuckles* well, that sounds nice though I am looking for a relationship, and not just a little fun. but thanks, I appreciate the comment and reply, its nice to know at least people notice

 

[devilsangel1456]

you sound like you would be a fun little slut to have I do enjoy dominating men very much, although at the moment I have been reduced to a submissive, that is another rather humiliating story... Good luck on your quest we doms are out there just hard to find.

 

[Guilan]

thank you for the, well, positive words would be interested in hearing the story sometime, and thanks for the goodluck I'm searching still, and appreciate any response

 

[kawarider]

No they are not

First, let me wish you well in your search. It can be hard to find people who have compatible vanilla interests, let alone kinky ones.

For what it's worth, I am a dominant man. Typically you will see that written as "Dom". A female dominant is referred to as a "Domme". Both are pronounced the same way. Occasionally you'll see female dominant referred to as a "Domina". A dominitrix is one who provides services in exchange for money.

The best advice I can offer is for you to join up with the nearest real time BDSM group and GO SLOWLY. Take your time, listen and learn.

Hope this helps

 

[MeiohSetsuna]

*hangs out in Hachiko's thread, while pointing to herself*


I shall be your good luck charm. ^.~

 

[HowMayIPleaseU]

Since his post has been bumped after two years, perhaps he is not looking anymore... ? hopefully he found his Domme somewhere along the way. But if not, then he'll probably appreciate the bump.

I definitely agree with DarkStevens post - the numbers are against you, but there certainly are female Dommes out there.

 

[EnglishGuy1982]

I recently started my own thread looking for a Domme, so I hope the OP is wrong..