Anonymous Feed back

[Guest]

There has recently been alot of discussion going on regarding Feedback etiquette. And enough has already been said about taking the time to respond back and tell those people "Thank you".

But there's a flip-side to that coin as well.

Recently I received an anonymous Feedback from someone who
really "hated" one of my recent stories. Basically they indicated
in their email to me that I wasn't talented enough to be writing, or worst case, should go elsewhere to post the kind of "crap" that I'm writing about.

It really bugged me for a while. And I wondered if someone really did feel that way, that maybe others did too. But then....I also realized the percentage of "great" feedback letters...most of which are NOT anonymous far out weigh the one's that are like this one I recieved.

As I thought about it further, I also realized that if someone isn't man enough (or woman enough) to at least send you feed back like this without a return email address I can respond to, then I'm not going to take your critisism very seriously. If you at least leave an email address, I will respect and consider your critisim far more than someone just writing me to tell me I stink. To be honest, I might not even respond back to you anyway if I feel your just saying something to be hurtful rather than genuinely
trying to point out a weakness in my writing. (Gee...I do have a few of those yes, and hopefully as I continue writing, I'll improve).

But please...don't send out an anonymous email to someone if your just going to be nasty about it. Bottom line is...if you don't like the way I write, or what I write about. Then don't read it.

There are a ton of skilled and very talented writers on Literotica to choose from. Everyone has a different style, a different take, and a different outlook on life. Isn't that what sets us apart and
keeps things interesting?

I'm not trying to blow my own horn, or even trying to convince "whoever you were" that felt like you had to send off an anonymous email to me like that. Frankly, I don't care. I write because I enjoy it. I think most everyone here does. And yes...there are some very skilled, very tallented writers on here, many of which are far better writers than I am. But at least I'm trying and hopefully improving with each story I post here.

For those of us still coming up in the ranks...learning and hopefully improving as we go...if you've got something you feel you need to say or express to anyone of us. Then do so, but at least be honest instead of hurtful about it. Or better yet...don't bother reading (my) or "our" stories. Find the one's you like to read and stick with those.

And if you are some hot-shot writer yourself, then shame on you.
Tell me to my face what I'm doing wrong and why. Maybe I'll learn something from that and improve a little.

And if you're not....need I say more?


Thesandman

To sleep........perchance to dream - William Shakespear

 

[Bob Peale]

Recently I received an anonymous Feedback from someone who
really "hated" one of my recent stories. Basically they indicated
in their email to me that I wasn't talented enough to be writing, or worst case, should go elsewhere to post the kind of "crap" that I'm writing about.

It really bugged me for a while. And I wondered if someone really did feel that way, that maybe others did too. But then....I also realized the percentage of "great" feedback letters...most of which are NOT anonymous far out weigh the one's that are like this one I recieved.

Thesandman4u,

If a week goes by and I don't get one of those, I check the clocks to make sure the earth hasn't stopped rotating on its axis. I've always found them interesting, the way it amazes me that you can get so much fluid when you lance a boil, but as to their overall value, they really aren't good for more than a laugh.

True, (presumably) it is someone's opinion, but for it to have any relevance, I kind of need to know why. Or give me an example of something you thought was better. Or at least spell all of the words right (talent doesn't have two "L"s)!

In most cases, those sorts of messages typically come from the same people who, without a more meaningful activity, are just striving for havoc.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Sometimes they'll tell you why, specifically. Most of the time I've found that they "hated" my writing because of the subject rather than the writing. Non-consent, mind control, loving wives, BDSM and incest are big "Hated it" topics because they deal positively with negative subjects. Rape, mental rape, cheating, sexual torture and molestation are the ugly realities of some of our fantasies.

I think that authors need to bear that in mind when they write a sexual fantasy that someone, somewhere may have been hurt by it and they will react negatively to it. It wouldn't matter if (Insert literary giant of choice) wrote the story, they would still hate it. And when you hate something enough to let its creator know about it, then you're going to attack its creator as well.

You can't please everyone with your writing. Someone is going to poo-poo it no matter how well you've done and how many others love it. This can be valuable if they give you specifics other than you suck and I can't believe you have the guts to pretend to be a writer. The rest of the time, consider it a wake up call to you. If we can let it be something that makes us strive to write better, then it's a good thing. After all, writing well is the best revenge.

Of course, it takes me a good week to get philosophical about negative mail. I have to rant, rave, scream, threaten with physical torture, and beat the hell out of the walls, the lawn, or any other handy object. Typing long hateful missives is very theraputic and makes me very glad that I received those negative emails anonymously cause damn, can I spew the vitriol.

 

[Tx Tall Tales]

I had to add my two cents.

It's funny, of the feedback I'verreceived knocking my stories, I've had one recurring type that appeared in almost half my negative feedback.

Some anonymous person didn't like one (1) word in my writings, and as such decided I my writings were below par.

For example: (Jen and Me 5 Feedback)
If there's ever been a useless term, "hooked up" is it. It sounds like battery cables.

or another:
Using words like "pissed" is just too lazy to be good writing.

Well, I'm doomed here. I will probably continue to use daily slang in my writings. And I will continue to 'piss off' this anonymous emailer.

I'm still waiting for that genuine feedback, of the type, "I couldn't stand that your story was rated higher than mine, that's why I gave it a one."

 

[Guest]

Texas...you and I must be getting email from the same critic. I was also "told" that my story was given a (1) because it was sitting higher in the rankings that his/hers was. And that because my stories were no better than his/hers were...that I deserved what I got.

Go figure.............

To sleep.........perchance to dream - William Shakespear

 

[Guest]

Thank you Killer Muffin....(love the name by the way...sounds tasty)...but I digress here.......

If someone with your experience and talent can get the occasional nasty email, then I guess there is still hope for me yet.

And thanks (who ever you were) for pointing out the minor mistakes in my last story. Now those I understood and actually appreciated hearing about. So in that regard, I do hope to improve on the minor things as well as the major ones in order to write a story that will make for a much better read.

And sorry for blowing off a little bit of steam there. I do tend to get a little winded sometimes. (Or as my hateful fan also called it....too wordy in my writing).

So I shall remain......

Thesandman

To sleep.......perchance to dream - William Shakespear

 

[Laurel]

Texas...you and I must be getting email from the same critic. I was also "told" that my story was given a (1) because it was sitting higher in the rankings that his/hers was. And that because my stories were no better than his/hers were...that I deserved what I got.

Go figure.............

If another author is emailing you saying he/she is downvoting your story to benefit theirs, then please forward the email and name of the author to me and I will write them. I can't stop them from downvoting, but I can give them a stern lecture on fairness, and possibly post their name here as well.

 

[Guest]

Thank you Laurel...unfortunately that email was also sent to me anonymously by someone referring to themselves as a writer.

Perhaps Tx Tall Tales had an actual name from someone, but I didn't unfortunately.........


"Thank you!"

To sleep........perchance to dream - William Shakespear

 

[apple3141]

negative feedback

Negative feedback is just diabolical. As a reader, not a writer, I still know how hard it is to write; as one who has done a fair amount of programming, I know how hard it is to edit your own stuff. There are, what, over 5000 stories on literotica, if you don't like the one you've picked, move on. If you do like it rate it 4 or 5, otherwise just shut up. If you REALLY like it (and some of these works are just amzing!) then e-mail the author and say thank you very much, hope to see more of your work. It is NOT the reader's job to discourage poor work. Anyway what you think is poor, may be lapped up by someone else.

As an old fart (I was 30 in '60) I have missed the sexual revolution, so I tend to stick to the softer categories. I can just shit with terror at some of the stories in Loving Wives. I do note that about two thirds of those end up with the male protagonist getting shafted. That (after spending 2 dreary years researching feminist literature) pisses me off somewhat, so I can scarce forbear to cheer when I read the opposite (e.g. Charley_Ace 's "Thumbs Down").

Offering observation rather than criticism,
1) is there any better way to indicate the height of passion than "OOOHHHH ... CCuuuuMMMMMIIIINNNNGGG"?
2) The sex statistics site on the web gives the average erect cock at (if I remember) 6.25 inches by 1 and a bit diameter. The average erect cock on literotica is about 9 inches by 2 and a bit inches, and requires commercial plates in most states. By contrast all virtual cunts are "tight". Real ones often are quite loose due perhaps to nature, or to childbirth, or to over-diligent use of very large sex-toys, coca cola bottles, etc, coupled with lack of excercise.
3) All virtual lesbians are beautiful, clean, and behave lovingly towards one another. In real life, not so. My daughter is a lesbian since puberty, she is pretty, but has had a pretty hard time trying to get long-term relationships to be just that. Of course that is in England, it may be different in (say) Florida. Not.

 

[Weird Harold]

If another author is emailing you saying he/she is downvoting your story to benefit theirs, then please forward the email and name of the author to me and I will write them. I can't stop them from downvoting, but I can give them a stern lecture on fairness, and possibly post their name here as well.

Laurel, I get the impression that these are anomous feedback, and unless the ISP of the sender is logged, there is no way of finding out who it is.

Even if you do identify the author of the messages, it doesn't necessarily mean that the e-mails are truthful about the reason for voting one.

Geo.Fraser, "As an old fart (I was 30 in '60) "

Welcome to Literotica's forum from a "not quite so old fart." You probably should know that there is at least one member older than you though -- "The_Old_Man" is 73.

 

[Eve_of_destruction]

Wait a minute, WH! I know i'm sort of like a newbie on the board, having been gone for several months, but didn't i read in another thread that you and the-old-man are one and the same? Let me know, cause I think I even referred to you as him in another post recently... if I'm wrong, then I do appologize!

 

[mmmmsexy]

anonymous feedback

I don't often read the bulletin board, and less often post, but I must admit this thread disturbs me.

I would think as writers, especially on a site like this, you (the collective you, not individuals) would honor a person's right to free speech, whether you agree with it or not. Why invite anonymous feedback at the end of every story and then complain because someone sends anonymous feedback? Forgive me, but this makes absolutely no sense to me.

With every creative art form, there are critics. That's fust a fact. Like the other writer's said, it may be the subject, a word or any number of things that set a person off and make them write negative feedback. Who knows, maybe they're just having a bad day and something in your story sends them over the edge. Who cares? Don't be so thin-skinned or next time they may be calling you a crybaby too (chuckle)!!

Whatever the case, I know I'm repeating myself, but every story on the site asks for anonymous feedback. If you send invitations to every guest, you can't complain about who comes to the party, or what they might have to say.

"Take the best and leave the rest", "look at the bigger picture", "don't sweat the small stuff", and all those other good old cliches (grin).

 

[Bob Peale]

Re: anonymous feedback

I don't often read the bulletin board, and less often post, but I must admit this thread disturbs me.

I would think as writers, especially on a site like this, you (the collective you, not individuals) would honor a person's right to free speech, whether you agree with it or not. Why invite anonymous feedback at the end of every story and then complain because someone sends anonymous feedback? Forgive me, but this makes absolutely no sense to me.

With every creative art form, there are critics. That's fust a fact. Like the other writer's said, it may be the subject, a word or any number of things that set a person off and make them write negative feedback. Who knows, maybe they're just having a bad day and something in your story sends them over the edge. Who cares? Don't be so thin-skinned or next time they may be calling you a crybaby too (chuckle)!!

Whatever the case, I know I'm repeating myself, but every story on the site asks for anonymous feedback. If you send invitations to every guest, you can't complain about who comes to the party, or what they might have to say.

"Take the best and leave the rest", "look at the bigger picture", "don't sweat the small stuff", and all those other good old cliches (grin).

The issue is not with Anonymous feedback. I think all would agree that the only bad thing about anonymous feedback is that, as an author, you don't get the opportunity to personally thank the submitter for taking the time to send it.

This thread is concerned with two acts in particular: purposely malicious anonymous feedback (which is annoying, not particularly constructive, and rude), and providing feedback that says, in essence, that I rated your story low for the sole purpose of screwing with your score (again, no constructive feedback).

This isn't "criticism" pissing in the snow and making words is calligraphy. And with respect to first amendment rights (which, like most of the other amendments are just as often used to justify despicable acts as they are to protect individual and collective liberties), no one is attempting to deny or suppress. But as is the collective writers community's right, this thread expresses feelings about the statements, not the right to make them.

 

[mmmmsexy]

anonymous feedback

I think the person who wrote Sandman and said they voted him low out of jealousy did a very creepy, childish thing. I don't condone that kind of thing at all, for the record.

The only thing I was saying, and honestly did not want to offend anyone, is that critics will always be around whether constructive or not. And the ones that are not, are not worth raising your blood pressure over in my opinion.

 

[cymbidia]

Re: negative feedback

1) is there any better way to indicate the height of passion than "OOOHHHH ... CCuuuuMMMMMIIIINNNNGGG"?

I consider this the height (depth?) of bad and/or lazy and/or boring writing and seeing it in a story will always induce me to mark that story lower. However, i send the author a reply, too, to let them know why i marked them down. And i sign it.

2) The sex statistics site on the web gives the average erect cock at (if I remember) 6.25 inches by 1 and a bit diameter. The average erect cock on literotica is about 9 inches by 2 and a bit inches, and requires commercial plates in most states. By contrast all virtual cunts are "tight". Real ones often are quite loose due perhaps to nature, or to childbirth, or to over-diligent use of very large sex-toys, coca cola bottles, etc, coupled with lack of excercise.

Again, i tend to not give too much, or too detailed, personal info in my stories as i think it takes away from the flow and heat of what i've written. Too, mine are far less about the people than what they are doing and the emotions flowing between them. Therefore, descriptions of cock length, for example, are not only unnecessary but act to inhibit the flow of my story.

3) All virtual lesbians are beautiful, clean, and behave lovingly towards one another. In real life, not so.

Ah! But erotica contains the element of wish fulfillment, does it not? Isn't good erotica that which takes you where you've never been, where you long to be, and enables you to be and do that which lives in the hidden corners of your mind? Who among us sees themselves being ravished, or making love with, or having a hot wet steamy encounter with an ugly partner? If erotica is not the place for physical perfection, then there is no place.

That said, i almost always get bored and click out of stories that pay too much attention to physical details (and my standard of "too much" is likely less tolerant than the standards many hold). Additionally, if the people who are inhabiting the story are too gorgeous, too perfect, my interest also wanes. I *like* the characters in the stories i read to have a wart or two. I want them to be fully-fleshed people, and real people aren't ever perfect. If they're too perfect, i also give slightly lower scores, again, with an explanation to the author.


Regarding anonymous feedback? Rather that than none, hmmm? I, too, have been told all manner of stuff in anonymous feedback, from the very complimentary (which prompted in me an ache to reply and an accompanying frustration that i couldn't cuz it was *anonymous*) to the very scary.

Considering what i write, i take that wide range of reaction as an indication that i'm doing the job i set out to do: to provide a slice-of-life view into a little-known side of sexuality. Of course my stories will generate criticism! I'd be worried if they didn't. I'd wonder if they were so dilute and weak that no one felt enough passion, of one kind or another, to bother replying.

Finally, i think the anonymous feedback option is useful because there are many people who come here *anonymously*, from thier desk at work, perhaps, or when their partner isn't looking, and these people will never give thier names on a sex site. For them, to provide any feedback at all is an act of courage. If we want to be able to sample their thoughts about our writing, the anonymous feedback option is essential.

 

[Guest]

Feedback

And then you get a simple anonymous feedback email from someone that just makes all the bad ones go away...


"Made me wet." That's it...that's all she said.

And it left me smiling and once again thankful someone felt that way.

Thanks "wet"....

To sleep........perchance to dream - William Shakespear

 

[The_old_man]

I have only submited one story. I got 3 anon. and one signed feedback. All were positive. The ratings have been in the 4.5 to 4.6 range with only 75 votes so far.

I am happy.

Will submit at least one more if I can get my 5.25in drive working again. I have all my stories on 5.25 disks.