An Oral Arrangement

[sjt2424]

What % of people here on Lit are really just hoping to find an anonymous, reasonable playmate that will (if you are a guy) stop by and blow you twice a week or (if you are a girl) stop by and go down on you twice a week?

All the other nonsense that goes on here (asking how to talk your wife into blowing your best friend, what the best way to make an upside down cake is, wondering why Obama is such a pussy, etc.) is that all just small talk hoping to find what is described in the first paragraph?

Being a guy looking for someone to blow me twice a week my requirements aren't too strict: be female, be clean and look like you are trying to look nice (even if you are overweight a little effort goes a long way), act like you are really enjoying yourself, and when you are done act like you can't wait until the next time you get to blow me. A guy can tell when a girl is into giving head versus just going through the motions.

If you are a girl and want me to eat you out - the same rules apply. I'd happily get a girl off with my tongue twice a week if they seemed likeable, were well groomed and were "normal".

thoughts?

 

[GiggLeGasm]

is this your personal ad? It's difficult to tell if you're asking what other people think about the superfluous conversation or if you're really just trying to find someone. I think what I'm reading is:

You're a middle aged man who wants a woman who likes to give blow jobs. You'd let her suck your cock - even if she's a little heavy - as long as she really wants to.

Does that about sum it up?

 

[sjt2424]

its probably both. I look at some of the topics being posted and wonder why people are asking about this stuff. So much of it is just utter nonsense that I can't help but think these people have some sort of psychological problem or have no one else in their life they can talk to.

I guess I should have directed it towards guys asking why they are involved in this ridiculous banter. I imagine a good % of them are chatting back and forth hoping that the woman on the other end of the conversation will think they are "deep" or "sensitive" and some sort of potential relationship will develop.

 

[sjt2424]

And I've been to Cleveland once and I'll never go again - so you don't get the privilege

 

[GiggLeGasm]

my loss, I'm sure.
I don't think you'd like me. I pretty much just lie there and wonder when it's going to be over so that we can go to lunch. Phew.. It's such a relief to get that out of the way. Thank you.

 

[sjt2424]

You pretty much lie there and wait for it to be over?

sounds like you need some work on your blowjob technique.

or maybe you are a "lying on your back, head hanging off the end of the bed, mouth getting assaulted" kind of a chick.

Ladies that like that are a real find.

 

[GiggLeGasm]

I am getting quite the education here.

You mean to tell me that there is actual technique!?!?
The few how-to snippets I've managed to find suggest that I'm just supposed to spit on it and make eye contact.. Not being much of a spitter (ever since that unfortunate accident in with my flute at band camp), I assumed I was doomed to merely lying there and staring at the guy like a deer in the headlights.

This brings hope to my otherwise vanilla menu of services

 

[tnh_06]

I am getting quite the education here.

You mean to tell me that there is actual technique!?!?
The few how-to snippets I've managed to find suggest that I'm just supposed to spit on it and make eye contact.. Not being much of a spitter (ever since that unfortunate accident in with my flute at band camp), I assumed I was doomed to merely lying there and staring at the guy like a deer in the headlights.

This brings hope to my otherwise vanilla menu of services

LMFAO

 

[ElijaRDC]

What % of people here on Lit are really just hoping to find an anonymous, reasonable playmate that will (if you are a guy) stop by and blow you twice a week or (if you are a girl) stop by and go down on you twice a week?

All the other nonsense that goes on here (asking how to talk your wife into blowing your best friend, what the best way to make an upside down cake is, wondering why Obama is such a pussy, etc.) is that all just small talk hoping to find what is described in the first paragraph?

Being a guy looking for someone to blow me twice a week my requirements aren't too strict: be female, be clean and look like you are trying to look nice (even if you are overweight a little effort goes a long way), act like you are really enjoying yourself, and when you are done act like you can't wait until the next time you get to blow me. A guy can tell when a girl is into giving head versus just going through the motions.

If you are a girl and want me to eat you out - the same rules apply. I'd happily get a girl off with my tongue twice a week if they seemed likeable, were well groomed and were "normal".

thoughts?

May I point you in the direction of Craigslist? I can't say for sure you'll find anybody, but you'll certainly fit right in...