DVS
A ghost from your dreams
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2002
- Posts
- 11,416
What are your thoughts and opinions?
I have a friend who is very much a newbie, but very much into being a submissive woman.
As other women are, she is married to a man who has no desire to fulfill her submissive feelings or even understands this sort of lifestyle.
But, her desires are deep, and I have told her she should look for someone with the same interests to explore with.
I am one who does not believe in suffering without, because a husband is not willing, because there is just too much out there to experience and enjoy. She has guilt about her husband, but I look at it this way...if you tried to get him to play and he is not at all into it, that is his problem.
I don't think someone should try to replace a husband, if he will fulfill something for you, but I do feel it is OK for someone to venture out and find someone to fulfill what he flatly will not. I know that mindset isn't followed by some, but that is just how I feel. I also think it can save an otherwise shaky marriage. Divorce isn't always the best way to go, I don't think.
Now this thread isn't about my feelings or beliefs. This is for other submissives to come forward and help with their feelings on what they suggest my friend should do. I told her I was on a forum that had lots of very smart people, and would get some good info for her to think about.
So, this is her past:
She had a bit of a conservative childhood, and when she finally got out into the world she really got out into the world. But, she was raped more than once. As everybody knows, this does things to your mind, that are difficult to get past.
Now, she has the mental fears from rape and the guilt of a non participating husband, and she is just not sexually happy.
I have suggested she get with some munch group or at least some sort of email list where she can talk to other subs and find out just how others feel about what she can do.
But, she is not that open, so I said I would come on here and ask some questions for her.
Like I said, this is not about me. I am just relaying any information for her to think about. I would appreciate any and all valid comments about what any of you have experienced, what you have done to get past your demons, and what you would suggest she might try to get past hers.
I told her I think she should venture out and find a friend for some part time fun. Of course, sticking with the safe avenues of looking, and talking long before meeting and playing. But, she does know that until she actually meets someone, it won't be easy to get a feeling of what her potential partner could be like. Anyone can be wonderful, "online".
Like I said, she is a newbie. Don't think she has done more than a lot of thinking on this subject. Oh, she has done a LOT of thinking on this subject. The acting out is where she needs help.
So, I will leave it here, for now. You will be helping someone along her way on a life of sexual fulfillment, where otherwise she would just sit at home and be the frustrated wife.
I know there is more for her out there. Do you agree? Thanks for any posts, in advance.
I have a friend who is very much a newbie, but very much into being a submissive woman.
As other women are, she is married to a man who has no desire to fulfill her submissive feelings or even understands this sort of lifestyle.
But, her desires are deep, and I have told her she should look for someone with the same interests to explore with.
I am one who does not believe in suffering without, because a husband is not willing, because there is just too much out there to experience and enjoy. She has guilt about her husband, but I look at it this way...if you tried to get him to play and he is not at all into it, that is his problem.
I don't think someone should try to replace a husband, if he will fulfill something for you, but I do feel it is OK for someone to venture out and find someone to fulfill what he flatly will not. I know that mindset isn't followed by some, but that is just how I feel. I also think it can save an otherwise shaky marriage. Divorce isn't always the best way to go, I don't think.
Now this thread isn't about my feelings or beliefs. This is for other submissives to come forward and help with their feelings on what they suggest my friend should do. I told her I was on a forum that had lots of very smart people, and would get some good info for her to think about.
So, this is her past:
She had a bit of a conservative childhood, and when she finally got out into the world she really got out into the world. But, she was raped more than once. As everybody knows, this does things to your mind, that are difficult to get past.
Now, she has the mental fears from rape and the guilt of a non participating husband, and she is just not sexually happy.
I have suggested she get with some munch group or at least some sort of email list where she can talk to other subs and find out just how others feel about what she can do.
But, she is not that open, so I said I would come on here and ask some questions for her.
Like I said, this is not about me. I am just relaying any information for her to think about. I would appreciate any and all valid comments about what any of you have experienced, what you have done to get past your demons, and what you would suggest she might try to get past hers.
I told her I think she should venture out and find a friend for some part time fun. Of course, sticking with the safe avenues of looking, and talking long before meeting and playing. But, she does know that until she actually meets someone, it won't be easy to get a feeling of what her potential partner could be like. Anyone can be wonderful, "online".
Like I said, she is a newbie. Don't think she has done more than a lot of thinking on this subject. Oh, she has done a LOT of thinking on this subject. The acting out is where she needs help.
So, I will leave it here, for now. You will be helping someone along her way on a life of sexual fulfillment, where otherwise she would just sit at home and be the frustrated wife.
I know there is more for her out there. Do you agree? Thanks for any posts, in advance.