An Open Discussion on Gender Bending

[Maid of Marvels]

In light of learning that ferryrider is also plainjane, I have some questions that have come to mind.

Granted, the ORP and the SRP forums are fantasy based and, I would say it's safe to assume that most of what is written here is fictional -- except for werewolves and elves and such.

We've always had women who write as men and men who write as women, but most have either stated the fact up front or kept it in their own threads. How do you all feel about someone who has not been so forthcoming with their true gender? Is that even a concern on this type of board? Do you, as writers here, find that to be a serious deception or do you think it's okay -- just someone living out their fantasy in the threads?

Opinions? Rants? Hate mail or PM's?

P.S. For those who don't know me in person, I'm a woman -- ever since the operation, that is.

 

[msboy8]

Voting without posting is like making Annomyous Comments. But anyway, Yes this is all about fantasy, but when I want to fantacize with a woman, I don't want it to be a man. Yes, I'm Cyber Bi, but I know that's a guy not a woman. 'nuff said...

 

[FrenziedMaiden]

As long as the person is honest about it with their co-writers, I don't see it as being a big deal.

 

[Maid of Marvels]

Me, either... but I suppose my question should have been: what if they have not been?

 

[FrenziedMaiden]

In my writing experiences with Ferryrider, he did inform me about it. He didn't say so at first, but he did tell me after a couple of days of writing together. I felt deceived at first, but soon came to the conclusion that this all fantasy and all of our characters are figments of our imaginations. I appreciated his being honest with me about it, even if it was after we had already been involved in 2 stories together. Being honest about it up front is always best though.

 

[Graybread]

Here’s my opinion, long winded as it may be.

I write for many reasons. I enjoy it first of all, the writing part, and I enjoy the interaction with a co-writer. I can fill any fantasy I may have and even find some new ones I’d never thought about. I can be whoever or whatever I want. I’m not a real Dragon, but I play on at Lit. I’m not an incestuous father, as a matter of fact, I don’t even have a daughter, except on the pages of Lit. I’m not an RAF pilot or a Queens Man or any of the characters I portray. But does that matter, I think not. I write, (when I write, sorry co-writers), for my enjoyment and that of my co-writers.

Literotica is basically a porno based Sexual Role Play site, at least this forum is. Role Play being the optimum words here. If someone has a need to bend the gender, I don’t have a problem with it.

What if Jacqueline Suzanne or Harold Robbins had written only in their gender? How would Romeo and Juliet read, if Shakespeare had only written from his gender point of view. How many women have read Juliet’s love for Romeo and felt it. But, but, but, it was written by a man. Does that disqualify Shakespeare’s ability to portray the feelings of the opposite sex. Is that deceptive, again I think not.

If the SRP deception is non harmful, let it go. If a man needs to get in touch with his feminine side so be it. If a woman has a need to feel a big throbbing cock hanging between her legs let her. Just don’t hurt anyone in the process. And I think part of the thrill is getting away with the deception. If you can write as the opposite sex and be convincing with it, more power to you.

If you cyber and get hurt, don’t get mad, live and learn. Some of us are here for the enjoyment of writing erotica, some of us are here to pound our puds, and some of us are here to experiment. I would imagine we would all be surprised by the amount of gender bending going on.

This site allows pretty much anything from piss drinking to dog fucking, just as long as your 18 years old when you do it. *chuckle* So how much harm can there be in a little gender bending?

I opted for #5 btw.

After all, read my signature line below.

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

Personally I opted for # 3.

It doesn't make that much difference the gender adopted but I feel as a co-writer I have a right to know that the sexy lady with the firm boobs and shaved pussy is really a guy who may or may not have a beer gut, smoke cigars and drive a truck( or whatever ).
It won't make much difference to the story, but it would in what I may personally imagine and I think not revealing it is a minor betrayal of trust between the writers.

However, what I consider an egregious breech of trust and out right deception is complaining to a story/thread starter as one writer and then chiming in to support that complaint under another name so I was asked to leave a story several months ago.

Now I've learned that the original complainant and the one who backed that person up were one in the same... ferryrider and plain jane. Now is that not blanant out right deception?

I had no problem with him until I found out about the dual ID being one person today and that just, to be vulgar and blunt, pissed me the hell off.

Okay, rant is over now. Sorry one and all, but my feelings in general and about ferryrider/plain jane in particular.

 

[peaceharmony57]

Thank you Phoenix....... Thank you for standing up for simple common descency from one writter to another...

Peace

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

Piece *G*, you're more than welcome and just my personal feelings on both matters.

 

[ferryrider]

Plainjane and me

Some interesting posts and the comments are appreciated, with one exception being the outright lie by PP01

He enered a thread i was already in, and the originator was by then well aware of my dual identity

I simply said if he is in, I am out, and she knew that meant both ferryrider and plainjane were dropping out.

It all started when I was in a thread about a year ago and the story needed another extra female, who didnt play a significant part, she simply was a name to make the story flow- and i introduced my wife Jane

I immediately told a number of people in SRP and they have known it all along, but I didnt happen to tell the other girl with whom I was writing, but to her credit she quickly figured it out due to the similarity in writing (read that as making the same typo errors)

For him to say that I objected and used another character(plainjane) to back up my objection is outright false - just like the liberal media report of the 911 commission saying there was no connection between Iraq and Al Queda

Roslyn well knew that dropping out meant both characters - there was no question in her mind that that was what I was saying.

It's all history now, and I have to go register my new names

 

[Maid of Marvels]

'Fraid not, ferry...

See, telling one "recent" co-writer doesn't make it better. I know two men right now that were writing with "jane" that were NOT aware of her true gender (male). I also know another who had a PM from "jane" telling him that "she" was hot to write with him.

As to it being "just to fill in an extra role", that's cool, too but for one thing -- "jane" jumping into almost every new roleplay that hits the boards (with or without your ferry personna).

And pardon me for rolling my eyes, but why do you now find it necessary to create new personna? So you can continue to defraud people in the forum? Why not just continue as ferry and drop jane or only use "her" where you let your co-writers make the choice of writing with "her" or not? That was the whole point of this thread to begin with.

Maybe I'm coming off like the Church Lady of the SRP, but I would have loved for one of "jane's" REAL male co-writers to have come on this thread and just said "ptooey" or "ewww".

 

[Maid of Marvels]

Re: Plainjane and me

It's all history now, and I have to go register my new names

I should have added that you will make every new "woman" poster suspect by virtue of the fact you've now said you would be registering new nameS.

 

[msboy8]

I agree with Maid of Marvels. BTW, I forgot something in my first post here:

ptooey


ewww

'nuff said.

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

This will be my sole response to what you've posted ferryrider.

I was told that I left or both ferryrider and plain jane would leave not that ferryrider, who is also writing as plain jane, would leave.
The logical conclusion was two people using the names and not one using both of them. Inadvertently omitted so added after the original post when I realized it when closing WordPad.

I don't lie and have never done so and take umbrage at the accusation, especially as the fact that we exchanged several PM's about your ultimatum to the story starter and you neglected to say you were both personnas which would have been the easy way to clear it up.

Your use of the 9/11 Commission as your analogy is interesting as one of your complaints to writing with me was that my sig line is to big, wasted to much space in story posts and is to political in nature.
However, I do agree with what you said about the Commission and will add it also didn't bother to explain the US Government through the CIA had trained and armed Al-Queda to fight the Soviets in Afghanastan btw. Nor did the Commission find who was ultimately responsible for not getting the known terroists out of the country prior to 9/11 and punish him/them for that failure in a proper and legal manner instead of sweeping it under the rug.

I never referred to "Roslyn" nor the story that character is in so that's a moot point ferryrider. FM asked me to bow out, very graciously I might add, of her story and I did so as you were there first so had 'first claim' as I, too, saw it.
I also received several PM's from others in the story sorry to see my character depart and now I'm back there again by invitation and have been welcomed back, just fyi.

New names?? Why change names? Worried no one will write with you under either name? I wouldn't be if I was you. Who objects to you writing as a male and female and being a male doing so. I certainly don't, but then again I guess I don't count as you won't write with me anyway.
However, it would just be more fair, as a matter of courtesy, to inform those you write in stories and PM's with that you're gender is male so it's very clear to them.

I happened to read MM's post(s) and have to agree and wonder how many of those whose story's "jane's" enters so quickly realize she's in fact a he. May make no difference to them, as it wouldn't to me so long as I was aware of it, but I am curious and hope some will post and let us all know if they knew or not.

 

[katalynn]

In all honesty, not real sure what to say to this. I've been writing with both males and females. As far as a dude pretending to be chick, or vise versa. Sure, it be nice to know whos behind the name, other than that. It all depends on them really.

Just like the game I play, over 99% of that is males, and a good number of those play female toons. (Some say its because its easier to get things. lol. not sure about that though..)

Anyway, the same thing goes for that as well. Most the time you don't know if its a dude till its to late and you've already made a fool of yourself. I guess, the same would go for here. U never know till its to late. Somethings just can't be helped.

Even if you do say, "Yo ... so and so.. are you a dude or a chick.."
They can still sit there and say yea, i'm such and such..

Me, I don't lie. I fully admitt that i'm female. I even tell people that I do have a boyfriend. Either way, its one of those things that ya just can't stop or can nevr be sure of less you've wrote and talked to the person for however long. /shrug. Thats my say. Not sure if it made sense, but there it is. hehehe.

 

[katalynn]

On that note.. as well.. it isn't hard to change the user name/chara in any game or boards such as this, or the one I play. Hence, it starts all over again.

 

[Shoshisexy]

I find this thread interesting in the extreme. I have written more than one story, although I have only tried to join one SRP that fizzled completely...never really got started actually.

I have written with a co-writer before though...two actually. One of whom was honest with me in both the story and in our conversations and the other who was not. The first, well..the results of that one are posted under my name with recognition for him as A Night at the Movies.

The second...Well...you won't find that one because we never finished writing the story. Although he had been honest about his sex, he had been dishonest elsewhere and eventually quit returning my messages or referring to the story in the least when he did message me. All of this because he had lied to me. A very promising story was tossed. I still have my part of it and hope to resume it one day, but not just yet.

So. My opinion? I really don't care if the person I am writing with is male, female, or a flying purple people eater...as long as they are honest with me. I believe that I deserve that much respect as a person. The other may write however they want...whether that is genderbending or not...just be honest with me as a co-writer.

 

[plainjane]

I dont see where it was necessary in my PM to FM to say both characters would leave if PP01 was in the threads. She knew it, and knew the names well in advance of initiating her new thread Block Party

And for your into PP01 and anyone elkse interested - Al Queda wasnt founded until the 90s. long afte thge Russians abandoned Afganistan. It was the Talkiban that the US suppooirted against the Russians in their war in Afganistan

I could say a lot more about the 911 commission but this isnt the time or place, but their report hasnt even been released yet, but was obviously leaked by one of the members for political purposes, and I'll bet I could tell you which member did it.

All this started when several years ago, I was told in confidence of a woman writing in SRP as a man, and I saw her seducing other females and was appalled, but time passes and we all get older, and wiser

 

[Maid of Marvels]

All this started when several years ago, I was told in confidence of a woman writing in SRP as a man, and I saw her seducing other females and was appalled, but time passes and we all get older, and wiser

Or you figure if one does it and it appalls you, why not see if you can get away with it yourself? *thumbs up* NOT!!

And that's not older and wiser. Older and wiser would have stopped you from doing the same. Here's a new name you might want to try -- plaindirty.

 

[FrenziedMaiden]

Wait a second here. Plainjane had not even entered The Block Party thread when Ferryrider requested that I ask Pheonix Prime to leave the thread.

And just FYI, I was not the person who outed your personalities, Ferryrider. You asked me to keep it as a confidence and I did. You messed up though, you wrote a post for Plainjane and it showed up under the name of Ferryrider, and others caught it before you deleted it. I want you to know that because I don't want to be brought into all of this. I'm just here to write and to role play, I don't want to be the cause of or involved in any conflicts.

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

Let it be known that at NO TIME did FrenziedMaiden make any reference to ferryrider/plainjane to me other than saying ferryrider had left the story and asking me to rejoin it.

I was told about the post faux pas by another writer here who read the error before it was corrected and edited and was aware why I'd left the story.

FrenziedMaiden, I hope that makes it very clear to all that you never told me anything about him/her/them.
PP

 

[Why]

..............

 

[DeliciousMaiden]

Suddenly alot of things fall into place ...

I hadn't read this thread until now.
I was sent the link and found myself laughing at the revelation.
Suddenly alot of things make sense.
Common traits in posts under both SNs.

I voted #3.
Whilst this is pure fantasy, I think it's basic respect to let people know what the true gender is of a writer they're sharing a fantasy / weaving a storyline with.
I know I'd want to know, perhaps more so as I'm not bi.
Even in fantasy, I don't have the interest/experience to write that with any iota of conviction.

Having seen "plainjane" jumping into any number of threads as they appear on the boards, ( I must admit it had gotten to the point where I was seeing a new story and betting with myself that "she" would jump in and take on the female role - and about 98% of the time I was right! ) I had noticed that many of the stories were BI and calling for FEMALE characters only.

I wonder ... do any of those "female" writers realise that the gender of their co-writer was in fact male?
In their place, I would not be happy about the fact.

Looking over all the comments and opinions I really think that this is not a GENDER issue, but a question of HONESTY.

The same would be true of someone using different names, but writing as the SAME gender.
At one time I intended to leave Lit and posted an OOC to that effect. I created a new SN in order to read the boards, but actually joined one thread. I made sure this was not with any writers I knew before and if I'd been PMed or communicated with any of my previous co-writers I would have "fessed up" and explained the reason for my new ID.
Shortly after the "trouble" blew over and I rejoined as DM.
I haven't used that SN since.

I know at least one person who has not been as honest.
I found out that one person who I'd written with under 2 or 3 different SNs was one and the same person.
Only after IMing for a period of time did he admit the deception.
Some were aware of his multi-personality, but certainly not the majority of his co-writers.

I did forgive and continued to write with him for sometime, but the "trust" was broken.
I felt upset and angry, used even.

This is fantasy, but it is still possible for people to play games with our feelings and deceive us, perhaps just because they can rather than any more dark motive.
Everytime we post something here, we open up at least a part of ourselves to others.

All too often I think people forget that there is a person with emotions, feelings and vulnerability behind each of the SNs here.
Words are extremely powerful and have a lasting effect.
With freedom and anonymity comes responsibility.

Apologies for the ramble ...

DM x

 

[peaceharmony57]

With my brief former post, most should be able to tell where I stand on this issue... It just never seizes to amaze me how some things just flyyy over peoples heads... Really? No way I am writting with anyone unless I know who I am writting with anymore... SIMPLE COMMON RESPECT.......... DUHHHH!

ADIOS!

Peace.... if there is any out there anymore!!

 

[stalwartone]

Okay, first, let me get this off of my chest.

EEEEWWW!

Okay, that done, let me pull my faithful soapbox "Warren" out of storage.

First, while this is a fantasy site, there should be a certain level of trust among writers. If you create multiple personas for posting, at least be remotely honest in the profiles section. As someone who has been caught in the "Dude, that babe's a dude!" trick, I find it reprehensible. I would not have these feelings if the cowriter had said to me from the start, "I'm one gender, writing as another." If that's your thing, okay, just be honest from the start. I'll respect my co-writers that much more, and hopefully they'll respect me if I do find an issue with their stances, or chose to go along with it.

Second, there has been one instance in real life around where I live where we had a "Boys dont cry" scenario, except that the young lady passing herself as male was doing it in order to shame local ladies on the singles circuit. She did look, at best, androgynous, but rather like a young fraternity boy. She would pick up women in the bars, take them home, seduce them, then announce, "I'm a woman, you're now a lesbian like me."

The last I heard, she was still in prison for sexual assault and rape charges. It was wrong then, I still feel that approach is wrong.

Third, if you present yourself in chatrooms as radically different than reality, you can be prosecuted. (Yes, admittedly, it's primarily in effect for age issues, I'm aware of that.)

PLease, just be honest from the start in joining threads. If you're doing something out of curiousity, admit it, please. If you are posting just for cheap thrills, admit that.

Thanks for putting up with the rant, "Warren" is back in storage.

Stalwartone
Male, still, despite the ex's best efforts.
Straight, but not narrow minded.