An open dialog to the Canadian Mafia

[Guest]

I'm now in charge of the CBFI. This is an open warning to any members of the Canadian Mafia. You will be captured. You will be given a fair trial. Then you will be punished. It's a pity executions are no longer en vogue.

Anyone interested in volunteering for Mistress duty please notify me at CBFI HQ.

 

[April]

And where might that be? I want to volunteer.

 

[Todd]

You think you can punish me, The Canadian Mafia? Brrft I fart in your general direction. I am unstopable, Especially after canadian beans and bacon.

 

[SweetCherry]

Damn! Looks like I got beat out. Don't suppose you need 2 of them?

Didn't think so. Shucks.

*sighing, walking out of thread and kicking the ground as I go*

 

[Guest]

Pre-Interview Screening

1. If you were able to, how would you help further justice regarding the members of the Canadian Mafia?

2. If the members of the Canadian Mafia asked you to help them escape from your clutches, how would you discourage them?

3. If you were to be accepted as a Mistress for the soon to be fairly tried and enslaved Canadian Mafia, how would punish them?

 

[April]

I'll start with item 2 first, if I may.
Discourage them? Naw, lure them in with false promises of help and escape. All the while setting a lovely little trap. Yummy, listening to their pitiful cries for help!

Now back to item 1.
Hmm, I don't have any ideas for this one, sadly. But what would you suggest Monsieur Hoover? Or should I call you Master Hoover? *choking laughter*

Item 3.
Punishment? Hmm, let's see. First I would make said duly convicted personnel clean my apartment. Go to work for me and stand there all day with not a damn thing to do, bored out of their friggin' minds! And if they still have any strength, I'm sure I can find something equally evil and disheartening for them to do.

 

[KillerMuffin]

One Mistress already! And Jimmy Hoffa said I'd fail. You're wonderfully evil Mistress April. Fabulous.

Fart? Phiffle! We have gas masks and a cork. Do you worst Mafia scum, you will be caught!!! Muaaahhahahahahahahahah

 

[April]

Thank you KM. It's all just naturally flowing up to the surface these days. *eg*

 

[KillerMuffin]

CURSES!!! FOILED AGAIN!!!

I'm not really KillerMuffin, I'm, ah, using her to, er, disguise, yes, to disguise my true identity so I can, ah, catch, yes catch you mafia people and er, um, bring you to, ah, justice, yes justice!!!

 

[Todd]

Fart? Phiffle! We have gas masks and a cork. Do you worst Mafia scum, you will be caught!!! Muaaahhahahahahahahahah

My powers of flatuation are beyond the means on normal manmade techknowlogy, your masks and corks cannot save you. My Flatuaence has a BTU rate of 23,000F, a 15 mile radious, and a 5.8 richther rating.

 

[KillerMuffin]

You think not Toddboy? I have other weapons in my arsenal that you are utterly helpless against. There is nothing you can do to stop me. Give up now, kneel at my feet and we can have a discussion about your grammar and spelling skills. Again.

 

[Todd]

You think not Toddboy? I have other weapons in my arsenal that you are utterly helpless against. There is nothing you can do to stop me. Give up now, kneel at my feet and we can have a discussion about your grammar and spelling skills. Again.

Enticing offer

 

[Juliangel]

I mailed my protection payment to the Canadian Mafia today so I am safe for a while


(It is on the way Todd and if you do not like grits do not blame me, it could be you have to be raised on them to like them.)

 

[KillerMuffin]

Now Todd, your spelling is awful. 50 tongue lashes, you'd better get started...

 

[Todd]

Now Todd, your spelling is awful. 50 tongue lashes, you'd better get started...

Very nice punishment