An observation of personal transformation and epiphanic discovery...

[O'Mac]

...Or

How she learned to stop worrying and love the pain.

So basically I'm in a pretty good mood at the moment. You see I've met a new friend recently that not long ago was definitely inexperienced in most things of a sexual nature. For a variety of personal reasons on her part that I will not divulge here, up until four days ago she had not kissed a man and up until three days ago she hadn't felt a man's penis. Yesterday was her first time in a bed with a man and first time giving oral, and tonight was her first time she's been able to acknowledge what I've expected since the first day knowing her: She's a very VERY sexually-submissive creature with a certain predilection for receiving pain and giving up control.

Tonight it all started with a few hard kisses, then I increased the sensation by biting hard on her bottom lip and drawing slowly back, letting it stretch out before snaping back and starting the process again. On most girls I know they would have complained of a sore mouth after the first few times, but she worked through the pain and showed definite signs of pleasure from it. After that, I moved down to her breasts. Kissing, sucking, and then ultimately biting the nipples and pulling them with much force to the sound of her low moans. I started to bite down hard on the soft skin of her neck and top of the chest, eventually wrapping my hands around the neck itself and controlling some of her air intake. Hair pulling was adminstered and she had a very positive reaction to it as well. We're still taking things slowly with regards to actual genital contact, but she has shown a lot of enthusiasm when i mentioned some techniques that can be used in conjunction with intercourse.

I'm not sure what great deed I must have performed to be given the chance to meet this wonderful person, but I am completely over the moon with the whole idea. For me, this is an opportunity to help someone completely explore themselves and cast away the misconceptions and fears she's always had towards sex itself as well as the BDSM lifestyle. I didn't post this to gloat or have my ego boosted. I just wanted to share some great news.

Thank you and good-night.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I apologise ahead of myself, but I had to say it

I don't mean to sound condescending (and yes, I realise this is not going to be well received and I will likely be crucified, but as a woman and a submissive I have to say it), but what I notice with a lot of younger Doms (and a few of the old dogs as well) is it is like 'another notch on the belt' sort of mentality, but passed off as being important. I have lost count of the number of subs you have mentioned being involved with (and as I said you are not the only one), and often in language that makes it sound as if it is significant and life changing for them and you. Maybe I am getting too old, but in my day you could be sexually promiscuous without dressing it up to be a meaningful relationship, earth shattering and life changing..it was sex for sex sake, nothng more, nothing less. For me, meaningful lasts more than a few days/weeks, and has more depth than getting someone into bed then eventually moving onto the next conquest. I have to wonder if this girl has held off any involvement of any type sexually until now, if she is going to be emotionally or psychologically able to handle the split when it comes, and based on past behaviour it will come. IME, dominance also is more than getting someone in the sack, much more.

Speaking personally, most of what I learned about my own sexuality came from my own observations and experiences, not the enlightenment provided by a male with a males body, a males mind...and IME, as a woman, I am not alone. Sorry this is not what you were probably expecting, and it is not meant in a nasty way, just an observation and perhaps a message you might think about which has been rumbling in my brain for months now as I read posts from Dominants both here and elsewhere. I guess you are just unlucky I decided to set it free here, and perhaps that is because I feel it might be something which will help you develop as a Dominant, and something you might value. Congratulations anyway as I believe you believe your heart is in the right place, and your intention is not to hurt or damage.

Catalina

 

[chris9]

O'Mac,
I just want to share an observation of a different kind.
Don't get me wrong, I think it's great you found someone to be involved with. I hope this relationship will be exactly what both of you need and want, no matter how serious/long/sexual/whatever it will turn out to be.

What I noticed is that you described to be doing to her what snowpetal told us her boyfriend is doing the the thread "What does he want???". On her thread, people started condemning him for not getting her (verbal) consent first. Personally, while it's most certainly a must to be talking about it at some point, I see it more as a legitimate way to test the water, so to speak. I found it worth mentioning that there are indeed two sides to every story, and you have just shared with us the other side. As I said, just an observation.

 

[catalina_francisco]

O'Mac,
I just want to share an observation of a different kind.
Don't get me wrong, I think it's great you found someone to be involved with. I hope this relationship will be exactly what both of you need and want, no matter how serious/long/sexual/whatever it will turn out to be.

What I noticed is that you described to be doing to her what snowpetal told us her boyfriend is doing the the thread "What does he want???". On her thread, people started condemning him for not getting her (verbal) consent first. Personally, while it's most certainly a must to be talking about it at some point, I see it more as a legitimate way to test the water, so to speak. I found it worth mentioning that there are indeed two sides to every story, and you have just shared with us the other side. As I said, just an observation.

I did notice the same, and that O'Mac thought he was a prat, but thought I had already done my dash. It is a lesson in context and the value of first person involvement perhaps.

Catalina

 

[JMohegan]

I'm not sure what great deed I must have performed to be given the chance to meet this wonderful person, but I am completely over the moon with the whole idea. For me, this is an opportunity to help someone completely explore themselves and cast away the misconceptions and fears she's always had towards sex itself as well as the BDSM lifestyle. I didn't post this to gloat or have my ego boosted. I just wanted to share some great news.

Power is intoxicating. The power to teach; the power to corrupt. The rush you get from the cocktail of paternalism laced with devilry. It's a truly incredible high.

A cautionary note from a man who is pushing 50 and has been there, many times......

There are all kinds of women, of course. But the women with whom I've had intimate physical contact have either led with their hearts, or had hearts that travel in lockstep with their bodies on the path to intimacy.

Heads up to the woman who asked, on a different thread, about the risks involved in "comparatively vanilla BDSM activities". One answer should be obvious.

 

[O'Mac]

---Double Posted---

 

[O'Mac]

Hey all, no worries with the comments and criticisms. I should have made it very clear at the beginning of the post that evetything was completely consensual and with her in charge of how things progressed. In fact, she doesn't want intercourse yet and I am completely okay with that. We are going at her pace and I am respectng her wishes in that regard. Again, I should have mentioned it before, but the feelings I have for her are so strong, I would never NEVER allow myself to hurt her in any way. I'm definitely not looking at this as another notch in the belt, but I do see how that could have been conveyed on my part.

I'm just completely taken aback at how she's changed so much over the course of a week. I'm sure that many here would probably acknowledge I have some pretty low opinion of many guys out there, but that's usually because I see what they can do to good people, and it infuriates me to no end. Cat, Chris, JMohegan, I'm never going to take offense when people give me their honest opinions and I appreciate everything you've said so far. Whatever you have to say, it's all good and sometimes a swift kick to the head is good to clear one's thoughts. Like I said, I didn't want to give ths impression in here as just boasting or looking for approval. I don't really know what I wanted to do. I think just to sort of share my thoughts in the experience, because so much of it is new to me as well.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Happy you were not offended...as to what you hoped to achieve, I think it came through pretty clear you were on a natural high and just needed somewhere to share and let it out...that is one of the good things about here, most of us have been there at least once and can relate.

Catalina

 

[JMohegan]

I would never NEVER allow myself to hurt her in any way.

Wondering how, then, you will ever teach her to "love the pain".

 

[FurryFury]

...Or

How she learned to stop worrying and love the pain.

So basically I'm in a pretty good mood at the moment. You see I've met a new friend recently that not long ago was definitely inexperienced in most things of a sexual nature. For a variety of personal reasons on her part that I will not divulge here, up until four days ago she had not kissed a man and up until three days ago she hadn't felt a man's penis. Yesterday was her first time in a bed with a man and first time giving oral, and tonight was her first time she's been able to acknowledge what I've expected since the first day knowing her: She's a very VERY sexually-submissive creature with a certain predilection for receiving pain and giving up control.

Tonight it all started with a few hard kisses, then I increased the sensation *
by biting hard on her bottom lip and drawing slowly back, letting it stretch out before snaping back and starting the process again. On most girls I know they would have complained of a sore mouth after the first few times, but she worked through the pain and showed definite signs of pleasure from it. After that, I moved down to her breasts. Kissing, sucking, and then ultimately biting the nipples and pulling them with much force to the sound of her low moans. I started to bite down hard on the soft skin of her neck and top of the chest, eventually wrapping my hands around the neck itself and controlling some of her air intake. Hair pulling was adminstered and she had a very positive reaction to it as well. We're still taking things slowly with regards to actual genital contact, but she has shown a lot of enthusiasm when i mentioned some techniques that can be used in conjunction with intercourse.

I'm not sure what great deed I must have performed to be given the chance to meet this wonderful person, but I am completely over the moon with the whole idea. For me, this is an opportunity to help someone completely explore themselves and cast away the misconceptions and fears she's always had towards sex itself as well as the BDSM lifestyle. I didn't post this to gloat or have my ego boosted. I just wanted to share some great news.

Thank you and good-night.

My reaction to this post was to smile and be happy for you and the lady you spoke of.

I love that you have found someone and enjoy her so as she enjoys you.

Negatives didn't occur to me.

*Wonders if that is that a flaw in my nature?*

Anyhow Congrats to you both!



Fury

 

[saw_man1]

My reaction to this post was to smile and be happy for you and the lady you spoke of.

I love that you have found someone and enjoy her so as she enjoys you.

Negatives didn't occur to me.

*Wonders if that is that a flaw in my nature?*

Anyhow Congrats to you both!



Fury

Your reaction speaks volumes to your character. A flaw.. not hardly.

You are one of the rare jewels here.

 

[O'Mac]

Wondering how, then, you will ever teach her to "love the pain".

You know what I mean, J.

Oh, and the whole convoluted title of the thread was intentionally taking the piss out of how serious I was going to be. Just my freaky style of humour.

 

[FurryFury]

Your reaction speaks volumes to your character. A flaw.. not hardly.

You are one of the rare jewels here.

Why thank you very much!

Fury

 

[Etoile]

I thought it was just a very hot post...

 

[NemoAlia]

I'm not sure what great deed I must have performed to be given the chance to meet this wonderful person, but I am completely over the moon with the whole idea.

"Somewhere in my youth, or childhood / I must have done something good."

 

[JMohegan]

You know what I mean, J.

Yup.

 

[O'Mac]

I don't mean to sound condescending (and yes, I realise this is not going to be well received and I will likely be crucified, but as a woman and a submissive I have to say it), but what I notice with a lot of younger Doms (and a few of the old dogs as well) is it is like 'another notch on the belt' sort of mentality, but passed off as being important. I have lost count of the number of subs you have mentioned being involved with (and as I said you are not the only one), and often in language that makes it sound as if it is significant and life changing for them and you. Maybe I am getting too old, but in my day you could be sexually promiscuous without dressing it up to be a meaningful relationship, earth shattering and life changing..it was sex for sex sake, nothng more, nothing less. For me, meaningful lasts more than a few days/weeks, and has more depth than getting someone into bed then eventually moving onto the next conquest. I have to wonder if this girl has held off any involvement of any type sexually until now, if she is going to be emotionally or psychologically able to handle the split when it comes, and based on past behaviour it will come. IME, dominance also is more than getting someone in the sack, much more.

Catalina

Actually, I did want to clarify something that you've said in the above comment, Cat. I don't know what sort of impression I've been giving off on the boards here, but this observation on your part is a bit of a shock to me. While I admit I know quite a few friends in the lifestyle, I wouldn't for a second consider myself promiscuous in any way. I've only been physically intimate with three people in my life and all were very special to me in some way. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't make me a player or anything like that. L*

Yes, potential partners have come and gone and I've talked about that here, but not all things have worked out, and that's fine. So yeah, I just wanted to redeem my honour, in case you were thinking I'm an easy screw or something.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Actually, I did want to clarify something that you've said in the above comment, Cat. I don't know what sort of impression I've been giving off on the boards here, but this observation on your part is a bit of a shock to me. While I admit I know quite a few friends in the lifestyle, I wouldn't for a second consider myself promiscuous in any way. I've only been physically intimate with three people in my life and all were very special to me in some way. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't make me a player or anything like that. L*

Yes, potential partners have come and gone and I've talked about that here, but not all things have worked out, and that's fine. So yeah, I just wanted to redeem my honour, in case you were thinking I'm an easy screw or something.

LOL, I'm sorry I assumed all those potentials got tryed out between the sheets. Your honour is restored and you have the potential to develop into a force worth reckoning with.

Catalina

 

[O'Mac]

LOL, I'm sorry I assumed all those potentials got tryed out between the sheets. Your honour is restored and you have the potential to develop into a force worth reckoning with.

Catalina

Yeah, we cool.