An author's complaint: writing about fingering a woman

[thebullet]

There is one phrase that, everytime I see it, I just get crazy. To me it's very distracting. The problem is this: within the context of the story, when a person (male or female) is inserting fingers into his/her paramour's pussy, it's always done like this:

he pushed two, then three long fingers into my rapidly lubricating sex.

Those words two, then three fingers are used in the vast majority of 'fingering a woman' descriptions. I looked back at something I had written in my early writing days, and sure enough, I did it too, to my great shame.

To me it's such a tired cliche that when I'm reading about a sexual encounter and that phrase comes up, it turns me right off. It's gotten to the point that I'll often just stop reading the story. (If you go back and read some of my early stuff, and you run into that cliche, just ignore it and keep on reading.)

Okay, I've had my daily rant. I guess it's just a pet peeve.

 

[Songcatcher]

You have an alarm ding set up, have you

 

[TheEarl]

There is one phrase that, everytime I see it, I just get crazy. To me it's very distracting. The problem is this: within the context of the story, when a person (male or female) is inserting fingers into his/her paramour's pussy, it's always done like this:


Those words two, then three fingers are used in the vast majority of 'fingering a woman' descriptions. I looked back at something I had written in my early writing days, and sure enough, I did it too, to my great shame.

To me it's such a tired cliche that when I'm reading about a sexual encounter and that phrase comes up, it turns me right off. It's gotten to the point that I'll often just stop reading the story. (If you go back and read some of my early stuff, and you run into that cliche, just ignore it and keep on reading.)

Okay, I've had my daily rant. I guess it's just a pet peeve.

I have to say that AFAIK I've never used that description. Haven't seen it before either, although I don't read that much on Lit nowadays.

The Earl

 

[thebullet]

TheEarl said:
Haven't seen it before either, although I don't read that much on Lit nowadays

I see it all of the time. I was just reading a story and the phrase appeared in the second paragraph of the story. It set off my 'alarm ding' and so I wrote the little rant above.

Seriously, this is one cliche that appears over and over again. Have I ever lied to you?

In high school we had a teacher who preceeded his sentences with the sound: "Nyaah". It drove us crazy. By the middle of the year, each time he made the sound the room echoed with the additional sound of a dozen clicks. Kids came to class with counters that they would click each time our teacher said "Nyaah" and at the end of the class would compare totals.

This one isn't that bad, but it occurs enough to annoy the hell out of me.

 

[wishfulthinking]

For me, it is reading paragraph 2 and: she was a 5"6 blonde cheerleader with 58-22-35 measurements, legs up to her ears, and I couldn't believe my luck...

But, to someone else, it may be spelling, and after 2 paragraphs of one of my stories, their alarm starts ringing

 

[thebullet]

Wishfullthinking wrote:
she was a 5"6 blonde cheerleader with 58-22-35 measurements, legs up to her ears, and I couldn't believe my luck...

Yes, I'm tired of 38DDD breasts and 10 inch cocks. A lot of people write their stories about mal-formed circus freaks. That, too, is usually a turn-off to me.

 

[entitled]

*snickers... then cackles*

Guess who's off to write a story about malformed circus freaks?

 

[thebullet]

Entitled:
I've gotta say, yours is my favorite AV on Lit that doesn 't expose a part of your anatomy.

Does that make me an MCP?

 

[SlyKitten]

I see it all of the time. I was just reading a story and the phrase appeared in the second paragraph of the story. It set off my 'alarm ding' and so I wrote the little rant above.

Seriously, this is one cliche that appears over and over again. Have I ever lied to you?

In high school we had a teacher who preceeded his sentences with the sound: "Nyaah". It drove us crazy. By the middle of the year, each time he made the sound the room echoed with the additional sound of a dozen clicks. Kids came to class with counters that they would click each time our teacher said "Nyaah" and at the end of the class would compare totals.

This one isn't that bad, but it occurs enough to annoy the hell out of me.

Oh dear! I had a high school teacher saying the SAME EXACT THING! And we did count the number of 'nyyaahhh' she said too! Except she was French and said 'Boonnn' instead. Was she by any chance a math teacher? Sorry for highjacking.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

What's the problem with it, Bullet? You mean that you don't like the action, or just the way it's described?

IOW is it a content problem or a style problem?

 

[Svenskaflicka]

*makes note to write "three, then two" from now on*

Me, I'm allergic to people using the word "då" when talking. It means "then", and is very common with people who are not used to talking in public. Compare it to "like", as in "and then, like, I, like told him, like: `look, if you, like, don't GET it, like, we need to, like, TALK!"

And in smut stories, I hate measurements, and I always hit the back button if the story starts with a descirption of a character or "this is a true story!"

 

[entitled]

Entitled:
I've gotta say, yours is my favorite AV on Lit that doesn 't expose a part of your anatomy.

Does that make me an MCP?

Sure! i'll make sure to pencil you in somewhere. How about between the elephant man and the bearded lady?

 

[Alex De Kok]

Confession time

I admit, I used measurements in one or two of my earliest pieces here. Me bad! Maybe one day I'll go back and edit them, except there's so much more I want to write. I stopped doing it when I realised I preferred to create my own image from content and (usually) limited description, and maybe, just maybe, my readers did too. I've also used the mirror cliche, too. Me double bad! Again, something I don't do, now.

I don't doubt for a moment that there are all kinds of faults still in my work, but at least I've got rid of some of them. Get rid of the rest, and maybe I'll sell something.

Alex

 

[R. Richard]

Those words two, then three fingers are used in the vast majority of 'fingering a woman' descriptions. I looked back at something I had written in my early writing days, and sure enough, I did it too, to my great shame.

I have never encountered the above phrase. However, I must ask, is it a numerology thing?

 

[sweetnpetite]

"stocking clad legs"

for me it's certain words that just seem to appear all the time. Not the body part ones either, but words like 'sodden' and 'clad' nowadays drive me a bit crazy. It's as if we are all running around copying each other (which in fact, many of us are) rather than coming up with orignial ideas and prases adn ways to describe things. There is nothing inherently wrong with the words sodden and clad, but there are many other choices that haven't been used so much. even simpler words that don't seem so effected, just plain 'soaked' and 'covered' would be an amazing releaf. I wouldn't even notice they were there

 

[BlackShanglan]

*snickers... then cackles*

Guess who's off to write a story about malformed circus freaks?

Someone's beat you to it. I recommend Geek Love. Good novel, although it's probably best that my mother didn't realize what it was when I was reading it in my younger years. It's the tale of a circus family who create their own sideshow by taking cocktails of drugs to create strange mutations in their children.

Shanglan

 

[sweetnpetite]

Someone's beat you to it. I recommend Geek Love. Good novel, although it's probably best that my mother didn't realize what it was when I was reading it in my younger years. It's the tale of a circus family who create their own sideshow by taking cocktails of drugs to create strange mutations in their children.

Shanglan

There are no new stories

 

[entitled]

Well feh. You just burst my creative balloon. Mean horse, you. Punishment is in order!

Someone's beat you to it. I recommend Geek Love. Good novel, although it's probably best that my mother didn't realize what it was when I was reading it in my younger years. It's the tale of a circus family who create their own sideshow by taking cocktails of drugs to create strange mutations in their children.

Shanglan

 

[BlackShanglan]

Well feh. You just burst my creative balloon. Mean horse, you. Punishment is in order!

No. Please. Don't. Stop.

 

[Pyed_Typer]

<snip> Those words two, then three fingers <snip> of 'fingering a woman' <snip>

Less than one finger is palming.
More than four fingers is fisting.

 

[elsol]

I'm a clit-rubber, no fascination for sticking things in women except my...

sincerely,
ElSol

 

[herecomestherain]

I quite like the description, it's easily visualised, it suggests an increasing accomodation, it speaks of wanting more, perhaps even of a little hesitation on the part of the fingerer, it's a numerical description that make sense to me -- one finger is not two, two are not three etc --

 

[minsue]

It's true that it's overused, but really so is any other part of foreplay or sex. How many other ways can you describe fingering a woman? Sure, you could just leave it out, but some of us would rather that not happen, in stories or in life.

 

[elsol]

It's true that it's overused, but really so is any other part of foreplay or sex. How many other ways can you describe fingering a woman? Sure, you could just leave it out, but some of us would rather that not happen, in stories or in life.

Pushed Two, Then Three...
By ElSol

I pushed two fingers inside her and pressed them up seeking... She arched her back and bore down. I smiled and pulled my fingers out.

"No!" she protested, sitting up. I put my other hand on her chest and pushed her back down. Our eyes met; I licked her from my fingers. I showed her the pair of fingers and made it a threesome.

She locked her thighs and shook her head.

"Open!" I whispered.

"No!"

"It's three now," I warned. "If I have to wait any longer, it will be four."

Her eyes widened with a hint of curiousity--deep inside them, but she thought better of it and slowly gave me access.

"Good girl," I said, brushing my three fingers on the outside of her pussy before pressing them inwards.

The End

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[Songcatcher]

Yeah, right.