An auction for...

[LittleRedDevil]

My breasts! I'm sick of them, they are nothing but a pain in the ass most of the time.

so, what's the opening bid?

What will you give me for them?

 

[Never]

I'll give you my breasts in trade.

 

[scylis]

if they come with you, i'll give you whatever you'd like!!

 

[SleepingWarrior]

Would it be inappropriate to ask for dimensions and such? Kinda like asking about the gas milage and horsepower of a car?

 

[LittleRedDevil]

Let's see...

Well, they were a 38c.

BUT...

They grew when I started taking BC, and now they are more a D cup.


GRRRRR!

 

[LittleRedDevil]

if they come with you, i'll give you whatever you'd like!!

Thank you darling, I didn't know you cared.

and as long as your gentle, they come with me

 

[SleepingWarrior]

Hmmmm yes very nice, do they come with a cupholder as a standard piece of equipment?

 

[LittleRedDevil]

No. No cupholders, but they do come with a lovely set of hands to hold...things.

 

[SleepingWarrior]

Things eh..... like cups? lol... or something narrower?

 

[LittleRedDevil]

Well, I was talking about my hands


BUT


That too.

 

[SleepingWarrior]

And I was talking about things your hands could hold .

 

[Morden]

<goes through his belongings>

"Well, for such fine specimens I think I can offer nothing but the adoration I have for them. Thier milky sweet centers surounded by that lucious covering and hung exquisitely on your wonderful body would look lovely next to my fireplace on say a nice bearskin rug."

 

[LittleRedDevil]

My hands are adept at holding anything you put in them. They are always warm, even in the dead of winter.

Consider it a bonus.

 

[LittleRedDevil]

<goes through his belongings>

"Well, for such fine specimens I think I can offer nothing but the adoration I have for them. Thier milky sweet centers surounded by that lucious covering and hung exquisitely on your wonderful body would look lovely next to my fireplace on say a nice bearskin rug."

*sigh*

I think I'm in love

 

[Morden]

<kneels before LRD and takes her hand in mine>

"With all bu such an offer one can only think the heavens have been swallowed and the devil is loose. I have all ways wondered how hot hell was. I think I now know. For before me is a source of that heat which in waves I do endure for the sake of the beauty in the flame of my passion"

<kisses LRD's and>

 

[LittleRedDevil]

We regret to inform you...

LRD has fainted.

 

[SleepingWarrior]

*Casually drops from sight*

 

[scylis]

whoa...
i'm WAY outclased by Don Juan Morden! i mean, damn!

 

[Morden]

<grabs LittleRedDevil before she falls>

"You must becareful. I would surely be throttled for having been the cause of harm to such a creature from your admirers on this board. Though it seems I may have talked out of turned as it is."

<Holds LittleRedDevil up and makes sure her perfection is still unmarred, by the whole ordeal>

 

[LittleRedDevil]

I'm awake, I swear.


Damn, I loose more men that way.

 

[SleepingWarrior]

I'm with you on that one scylis, I don't think my creative juices flow as well as Morden's!

 

[LittleRedDevil]

Creative juices aside...

I've decided I need three.

One for my ears.

One for my chest.

and one on the floor.

any takers?

 

[Morden]

<Bows to Scylis and Sleeping>

"Tis with sorrow that I have stepped in for the weeping of my heart could not yearn in the dark any longer. Tis that weeping wence I draw the juice I so lavish onto this beauty. This does not make me any more worthy then you my friends. I would not have the impunity to interfere with your affections for this red clad vixen if so you desire her. Say but a word and I shall unmake myself into the night."

 

[SleepingWarrior]

*Silently waits to see where he will fall* No way Morden, you have great skills, no way I could possibly think of telling you to stop out of fear of being run off by the lovely ladies you please.

 

[scylis]

no no!
you stay, Shakespear! me and Sleepy will just stand off to the side and write that shit down! damn!