Am I wrong in thinking this way??

[lilevilpunk]

Ok I have a problem... I am Bi and my husband and I were discussing have a 4some with a \nother MF couple. We have already done the whole FFM thing and really enjoyed ourselves. However, he wanted to swap wives and screw the other chick while I was with the other guy. I hate the idea of watching my husband do that! I am not necessarily fond of the idea of me being with the other mane either; however I would do it if that is what he wanted. I am anextremely jealous person when it comes down to it and I feel that when a man sticks his "member" inside some one else (other than their mouths) they should be together, I consider it something special. He says that he doesnt feel the same way because the other two people would be mearly playtoys...I dont know what to do. I REALLY would like to have another couple involved as long as she got screwed by her man and I got screwed by mine. Your advice would be greatly appreciated....THANKS

 

[silverwhisper]

if you're a jealous person, do not do this. you obviously have some concerns there, and regardless of what your husband wants, he should respect those concerns, IMHO. if he's smart, he'll agree to your boundaries, in the hopes that perhaps after the first time, you might feel differently, again IMHO.

ed

 

[lilevilpunk]

He said that he respects what I say 100% and he will not do anything that I dont want him to do or am uncomfortable with...thank you for your reply

 

[silverwhisper]

you know, i realize i didn't really answer your question. i don't think you should feel that your thinking is "wrong". for a lot of people on this planet, the idea of a married couple inviting another person into their bed (or whatever furniture is appropriate) is "wrong", after all. what works for some doesn't work for others.

ed

 

[lilevilpunk]

See its not the idea of having someone else in my bed that bothers me, infact it turns me on; however it is just the idea of my husband screwing another chick that DOES bother me. I reazlie how hypocritic I am because I see nothing wrong with me enjoying the other female in various ways but my husband cant

 

[silverwhisper]

yes, but regardless of whether it's hypocritical or not, it's still the way you feel. it isn't, after all, like you can turn your emotions on/off with the flip of a switch or something, is it? :>

ed

 

[lilevilpunk]

I wish I could! It would make life a lot easier

 

[John Doe]

Yes, you are wrong in thinking this way. You are an immature, insecure (hey that rhymes!) hyporcite. Grow up or divorce him.

 

[Never]

I'm curious, you're going to have a foursome with another MF couple but don't want him to have sex with the other lady or allow the other husband to have sex with you? What do you expect the men to do, watch while you make out with the wife? That's not much of a foursome.

 

[robbie_boy1]

huh?

Yes, you are wrong in thinking this way. You are an immature, insecure (hey that rhymes!) hyporcite. Grow up or divorce him.

Asking an honest question and stating how you feel about it is grown up. Your cookie cutter answer to her problem is not even an answer is it? Sounds like some pent up anger you have in your own life...but I digress. People are funny. It is not always a what is good for the goose is good for the gander..then again, you could be young and have no idea what you are talking about...only my opinion but I do welcome yours.......

have a day
r

 

[The Mutt]

Why don't the four of you get in bed in a pitch black room? Foursomes are best if all four are bi.

 

[John Doe]

Asking an honest question and stating how you feel about it is grown up. Your cookie cutter answer to her problem is not even an answer is it? Sounds like some pent up anger you have in your own life...but I digress. People are funny. It is not always a what is good for the goose is good for the gander..then again, you could be young and have no idea what you are talking about...only my opinion but I do welcome yours.......

have a day
r

You are an idiot.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander if her hubby is going to let her get some pussy and wants some action with the other woman too.

Like Never said, the wife's terms don't make for much of a foursome.

 

[robbie_boy1]

thank you

You are an idiot.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander if her hubby is going to let her get some pussy and wants some action with the other woman too.

Like Never said, the wife's terms don't make for much of a foursome.

and you are a fool and a child, the rest of us know this

 

[anne27]

Ok I have a problem... I am Bi and my husband and I were discussing have a 4some with a \nother MF couple. We have already done the whole FFM thing and really enjoyed ourselves. However, he wanted to swap wives and screw the other chick while I was with the other guy. I hate the idea of watching my husband do that! I am not necessarily fond of the idea of me being with the other mane either; however I would do it if that is what he wanted. I am anextremely jealous person when it comes down to it and I feel that when a man sticks his "member" inside some one else (other than their mouths) they should be together, I consider it something special. He says that he doesnt feel the same way because the other two people would be mearly playtoys...I dont know what to do. I REALLY would like to have another couple involved as long as she got screwed by her man and I got screwed by mine. Your advice would be greatly appreciated....THANKS

You shouldn't do something like this for someone else. Introducing other people into your bed should never be done if either of you is in the least bit insecure or jealous. Not everyone is cut out for this sort of thing. It doesn't make you 'wrong', it makes you human.

 

[lilevilpunk]

Yes, you are wrong in thinking this way. You are an immature, insecure (hey that rhymes!) hyporcite. Grow up or divorce him.

Can you explain how divorcing my husband would make things better. Do me a favor if you are gonna give me advice or tell me your opinion make sure you make sense ok

 

[MintSoda]

You are an idiot.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander if her hubby is going to let her get some pussy and wants some action with the other woman too.

Like Never said, the wife's terms don't make for much of a foursome.

Becoming insulting and abusive isn't necessary. This is a forum for discussion and conversation. I suggest you take some anger management courses or learn to deal with people in a civilized manner. Whether or not you agree with someone is irrelevant, it's how you conduct yourself that can make you right or wrong. Real men know how to speak with others in a manner that gets their point across without becoming abusive and calling names. I suggest you look around the forum for other examples of men you might emulate.

As for the original poster...I think this doesn't speak highly of your marriage in the first place. If he stated that you would be using this other couple as toys I would seriously suggest you take into account what that means. Other human beings should never be viewed as simply objects for fun. This also seems to be an arbitrary enforcement of rules that you two should have discussed long before you had anyone else in your bed. Clearly he didn't know where your boundaries were on where his member could be.

You aren't wrong for not wanting to go through with a "wife swap" (a term I think is wholly demeaning anyway) but you are very wrong in the way you've been viewing other people that you bring into your marriage, and you are very wrong in how you've gone about this experimentation. On the plus side, you're not alone, your husband seems to be equally clueless on the value of other people's feelings and seems to care even less about how this may affect your marriage.

My advice, and you're probably not going to like this or listen to me, but you need to get marriage counciling and you need to stop with threesomes and swinging until you and your husband are both mature enough to handle it, and that may never happen. If that isn't something you can do then perhaps you should consider a divorce, it's fairly clear he isn't done sleeping with women that aren't you and it's also fairly clear you're not yet capable of communicating your wants and desires in a way he can understand...neither of those make for a good marriage.

 

[lilevilpunk]

Becoming insulting and abusive isn't necessary. This is a
As for the original poster...I think this doesn't speak highly of your marriage in the first place. If he stated that you would be using this other couple as toys I would seriously suggest you take into account what that means. Other human beings should never be viewed as simply objects for fun. This also seems to be an arbitrary enforcement of rules that you two should have discussed long before you had anyone else in your bed. Clearly he didn't know where your boundaries were on where his member could be.

You aren't wrong for not wanting to go through with a "wife swap" (a term I think is wholly demeaning anyway) but you are very wrong in the way you've been viewing other people that you bring into your marriage, and you are very wrong in how you've gone about this experimentation. On the plus side, you're not alone, your husband seems to be equally clueless on the value of other people's feelings and seems to care even less about how this may affect your marriage.

My advice, and you're probably not going to like this or listen to me, but you need to get marriage counciling and you need to stop with threesomes and swinging until you and your husband are both mature enough to handle it, and that may never happen. If that isn't something you can do then perhaps you should consider a divorce, it's fairly clear he isn't done sleeping with women that aren't you and it's also fairly clear you're not yet capable of communicating your wants and desires in a way he can understand...neither of those make for a good marriage.

umm thanks for you opinion; however, our marriage is fine. We do communicate very well and very clearly. He understands everything I say about the topic and he doesnt mind at all. And it is possible to have a fun threesome or foursome with out him having to screw the other chick. I am suprised at how negative everyone is talking about our marriage, you people arent here to hear our conversations and maybe I should have reworded my post but oh well

 

[John Doe]

Becoming insulting and abusive isn't necessary.

Niether is posting on the Internet. So what?

This is a forum for discussion and conversation.

No kidding? I thought it was a goatroping contest.

I suggest you take some anger management courses or learn to deal with people in a civilized manner.

And I suggest you pull your head out of your ass, step away from the Playground and grow some thicker skin, mkay?

Whether or not you agree with someone is irrelevant, it's how you conduct yourself that can make you right or wrong.

Well, you're conducting yourself like a contrary ass right now. Does that mean you're right or wrong?

Get fucking real. when someone is being an idiot about something or they don't have their facts straight, then they are wrong no matter how polite or rude they are and I am going to tell them they are wrong.

Real men know how to speak with others in a manner that gets their point across without becoming abusive and calling names.

Yes and you ought to try it sometime.

I was perfectly civil until people started insulting ME and taking issue with what I said in a less than civil manner. In any case, I don't give a shit about being a "real man" whatever that is and I suspect anyone who is concerned with such a facade is far from it.

I suggest you look around the forum for other examples of men you might emulate.

I suggest you finish removing your head from your butt before getting off your high horse, else you might strain something on the way down.

As for the original poster...I think this doesn't speak highly of your marriage in the first place. If he stated that you would be using this other couple as toys I would seriously suggest you take into account what that means. Other human beings should never be viewed as simply objects for fun. This also seems to be an arbitrary enforcement of rules that you two should have discussed long before you had anyone else in your bed. Clearly he didn't know where your boundaries were on where his member could be.

You aren't wrong for not wanting to go through with a "wife swap" (a term I think is wholly demeaning anyway) but you are very wrong in the way you've been viewing other people that you bring into your marriage, and you are very wrong in how you've gone about this experimentation. On the plus side, you're not alone, your husband seems to be equally clueless on the value of other people's feelings and seems to care even less about how this may affect your marriage.

My advice, and you're probably not going to like this or listen to me, but you need to get marriage counciling and you need to stop with threesomes and swinging until you and your husband are both mature enough to handle it, and that may never happen. If that isn't something you can do then perhaps you should consider a divorce, it's fairly clear he isn't done sleeping with women that aren't you and it's also fairly clear you're not yet capable of communicating your wants and desires in a way he can understand...neither of those make for a good marriage.

Okay, so what this means is, you agreed with me anyway, you just didn't like how I said it, which explains the nonsensical and non sequitor "whether or not you agree with someone is irrelevant, it's how you conduct yourself that can make you right or wrong" comment.

You are a hypocrite.

 

[John Doe]

Can you explain how divorcing my husband would make things better. Do me a favor if you are gonna give me advice or tell me your opinion make sure you make sense ok

It wouldn't make things better, it would acknowledge that things are shitty as they are and that they won't get better, provided divorce is held as a last resort of course, which was implicit in what I said. If you were gullible enough to get divorced based solely on the advice of a stranger on the Internet, you'd be too stupid to be married anyway.

In any case, if the issue cannot be resolved, explain to me what other options there are?

 

[MintSoda]

Niether is posting on the Internet. So what?



No kidding? I thought it was a goatroping contest.



And I suggest you pull your head out of your ass, step away from the Playground and grow some thicker skin, mkay?



Well, you're conducting yourself like a contrary ass right now. Does that mean you're right or wrong?

Get fucking real. when someone is being an idiot about something or they don't have their facts straight, then they are wrong no matter how polite or rude they are and I am going to tell them they are wrong.



Yes and you ought to try it sometime.

I was perfectly civil until people started insulting ME and taking issue with what I said in a less than civil manner. In any case, I don't give a shit about being a "real man" whatever that is and I suspect anyone who is concerned with such a facade is far from it.



I suggest you finish removing your head from your butt before getting off your high horse, else you might strain something on the way down.




Okay, so what this means is, you agreed with me anyway, you just didn't like how I said it, which explains the nonsensical and non sequitor "whether or not you agree with someone is irrelevant, it's how you conduct yourself that can make you right or wrong" comment.

You are a hypocrite.

I seem to have hurt someone's feelings. So that's really all you have? Random insults and curse words with pathetic attempts at being clever? I'd feel sorry for you but you're kind of a dime a dozen on the internet. People with absolutely nothing valid to say spouting off garbage just because this is the only place anyone will listen to them. By the way, you didn't use the words "sequitor" or "hypocrite" correctly. Just spelling and using the words isn't enough to sound intelligent, you actually have to know what they mean.

I didn't agree with you in any fashion, but it's not surprising to me that you didn't understand my post. You were so eager to spout of more gibberish and whiney crap that you must not have bothered to read what I said. Again, I encourage you to seek help, obviously you're unable to control your anger towards women and people in general. You are a sad strange little man, and you have my pity.

 

[John Doe]

I seem to have hurt someone's feelings.

On the contrary, I've been wondering whetehr you think I ran over your dog or something, to deserve such random vitriol.

So that's really all you have? Random insults and curse words with pathetic attempts at being clever? I'd feel sorry for you but you're kind of a dime a dozen on the internet. People with absolutely nothing valid to say spouting off garbage just because this is the only place anyone will listen to them. By the way, you didn't use the words "sequitor" or "hypocrite" correctly. Just spelling and using the words isn't enough to sound intelligent, you actually have to know what they mean.

You have insulted me just as much as I you if not more, my curse words were hardly random (all two of them), and I wasn't trying to be clever.

I didn't agree with you in any fashion, but it's not surprising to me that you didn't understand my post. You were so eager to spout of more gibberish and whiney crap that you must not have bothered to read what I said. Again, I encourage you to seek help, obviously you're unable to control your anger towards women and people in general. You are a sad strange little man, and you have my pity.

What do my opinions about women have to do with anything? I told her she might rather get a divorce, as did you. I don't recall whining either. I posted my opinion. Any whining in this thread has been done by you or others.

Anyway, as for anger towards women or people in general, I don't know where you got that. If you got it from a few swear words, well this is a porn baord, not a kindergarten. And if you got it from something I said that insulted you, well you've done plenty of random insulting yourself. The comments about my pathetic attempts at this or I'm a sad little man, and all that? If that's not random then I don't know what is.

As for the meaning of the words sequitor and hypocrite, I used them correctly. Your comment that I quoted was out of sequence. That is pretty much literally what non sequitor means. It makes no sense where it is. It's non-sequential, out of place, random.

Which is where hypocrisy comes in. You do not practice what you preach. In one breath you chide me for being "abusive and insulting" and in another you turn right around and are equally abusive and insulting to me.

 

[silverwhisper]

i wish i could! it would make life a lot easier

yes, but o so boring... :>

ed

 

[MintSoda]

On the contrary, I've been wondering whetehr you think I ran over your dog or something, to deserve such random vitriol.



You have insulted me just as much as I you if not more, my curse words were hardly random (all two of them), and I wasn't trying to be clever.




What do my opinions about women have to do with anything? I told her she might rather get a divorce, as did you. I don't recall whining either. I posted my opinion. Any whining in this thread has been done by you or others.

Anyway, as for anger towards women or people in general, I don't know where you got that. If you got it from a few swear words, well this is a porn baord, not a kindergarten. And if you got it from something I said that insulted you, well you've done plenty of random insulting yourself. The comments about my pathetic attempts at this or I'm a sad little man, and all that? If that's not random then I don't know what is.

As for the meaning of the words sequitor and hypocrite, I used them correctly. Your comment that I quoted was out of sequence. That is pretty much literally what non sequitor means. It makes no sense where it is. It's non-sequential, out of place, random.

Which is where hypocrisy comes in. You do not practice what you preach. In one breath you chide me for being "abusive and insulting" and in another you turn right around and are equally abusive and insulting to me.

I really do feel sorry for you.

 

[lilevilpunk]

Wow...I didnt meant to piss anyone off or start anything I am sorry. I just wanted to know what everyones else thought. I DO realize however that I was wong in the way I looked at ceritan things pertaining to the subject; however, my husband and I had a long discussion on it. I no longer feel as strongly against his ideas now as I did before. I did not say that we were going to follow through with it though. We will forget about it for now and maybe later on if it comes up in conversation again we will talk about it and THEN decide on wether or not we are ready. I thank everyone for their comments wether I agreed or not. Even the ones that were rather harsh...

 

[John Doe]

I really do feel sorry for you.

Don't bother, you have plenty of your own problems to worry about.