Always looking for Feedback!
- Thread starter ANNE240
- Start date
champagne1982
Dangerous Liaison
- Joined
- Aug 31, 2002
- Posts
- 7,671
I was going to post a link to your stories for you and then explain how you could do it yourself, then I went to your member page and found a long list of Incest Category submissions with a bunch of little red H's beside them. A warning of the nature of your subject matter would have been polite.
In view of that, you should ask your fan's for feedback, they are the ones who enjoy your work. I don't want to critique or review something as personally objective no matter how polite the request.
Good luck.
In view of that, you should ask your fan's for feedback, they are the ones who enjoy your work. I don't want to critique or review something as personally objective no matter how polite the request.
Good luck.
Delicious Blonde
Experienced
- Joined
- May 8, 2003
- Posts
- 54
Hi Anne....with all those red H's you're getting plenty of feedback from readers who like your stuff so you don't really need positive reinforcement from anyone here! Have fun and keep up the good work.
Colleen Thomas
Ultrafemme
- Joined
- Feb 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,545
Welcome Anne,
I think you also have a cheering section in the story ideas forum
-Colly
I think you also have a cheering section in the story ideas forum
-Colly
dr_mabeuse
seduce the mind
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2002
- Posts
- 11,528
I went and picked a story at random: "Nothing To Be Ashamed Of".
You have very long blocks of dialogue without a single attributive: a "she said" or "I said". You can pull this off when you only have two people talking, but still it's very easy for the reader to get confused and forget who's saying what, and when this happens, there's no way to find out except to backtrack to the beginning of the dialogue. It reads more like a screenplay than a story in these parts.
The exposition--the non-dialogue, descriptive parts of a story--is very sparse and I found the language flat. You could stand to enrich your prose with more descriptions, more sensual detail: what things feel like, how they look and feel.
I'll admit that the appeal of incest is lost on me, but other than that it was a pretty tight story. Too much unattributed dialogue and not enough descriptive language, but other than that it was good.
---dr.M.
You have very long blocks of dialogue without a single attributive: a "she said" or "I said". You can pull this off when you only have two people talking, but still it's very easy for the reader to get confused and forget who's saying what, and when this happens, there's no way to find out except to backtrack to the beginning of the dialogue. It reads more like a screenplay than a story in these parts.
The exposition--the non-dialogue, descriptive parts of a story--is very sparse and I found the language flat. You could stand to enrich your prose with more descriptions, more sensual detail: what things feel like, how they look and feel.
I'll admit that the appeal of incest is lost on me, but other than that it was a pretty tight story. Too much unattributed dialogue and not enough descriptive language, but other than that it was good.
---dr.M.
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