All This and Heaven Too (closed)

[TearsoftheWorld]

http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/jess-green-25.jpg?w=500&h=767

Enjoy



~ ~ ~

And I would give all this and Heaven too
I would give it all if only for a moment that I could just understand
The meaning of the word you see
'Cause I've been scrawling it forever but it never makes sense to me at all

~ ~ ~​

Thunder rolled overheard as a young woman walked down the street late at night, and she seemed to be moving with no clear destination in mind. She seemed just as lost and out of place as the rain that fell upon the earth. Her soft blue eyes scanned her surroundings, but nothing seemed familiar to her. Not only that, but she couldn't figure out how she got there in the first place. She didn't know where she came from. She didn't even know her own name. She had a name, but when she tried to think of it she came up short.

As the rain started to fall a bit heavier, the young woman took shelter underneath the partial roof of a bus stop, but she couldn't stay there indefinitely. Across the street was a large building with several cars parked outside, and the glowing sign on the front lawn said Weston Police Headquarters. She shivered for a moment as the wind picked up, and then she made up her mind. After traffic cleared up a bit she quickly crossed the street and ran up the steps towards the front entrance. She pulled open the door and stepped inside, drawing a few curious looks from the officers stationed inside.

"Can I help you?"

The rain-drenched girl looked over at the front desk and then thought about walking back outside.

Nothing looked familiar to her.

"Miss? Hello?"

The uniformed cop stood up from his seat behind the desk and started to walk around towards the front. When the young girl flinched he stopped moving, thinking that perhaps she was in some kind of trouble, and he didn't want to scare her.

"Are you hurt?"

He chose his words carefully and spoke them slowly, but when she didn't respond he started to wonder if it was something more serious. She looked to be about half his age, and from head to toe she was soaking wet. He stepped over to a locker nearby, and he could feel her eyes following after him as he pulled it open and reached inside for a blanket.

"Here," he said, offering it to her. The young girl looked down at the warm blanket and then reached forward to take it. It was heavy but incredibly warm, and she let it unfurl before wrapping it tightly around her slender body. She hugged it close and shivered slightly, but the feeling would soon pass.

"Now can you tell me what's wrong?"

The young girl seemed to think for a moment, but she had no answer.

That was part of the problem.

"Can you tell me your name?"

"I don't know," she finally responded.

"You can tell me, it's okay. You're safe here."

"I don't know what my name is."

Another cop emerged from one of the side rooms, and the older officer questioning the young girl took him aside to explain the situation. She caught them both looking over at her periodically, but she could really make out what they were saying. The younger guard stepped over after a moment and introduced himself, and as he walked her over to a chair the young woman noticed that he had a bandage wrapped around part of his wrist. He smiled warmly when he saw the look of concern written on her face, and shrugged it off as nothing serious.

"So you're saying that you don't know who you are?"

She nodded her head.

"Okay. Is there anything that you can tell me?"

The young woman shook her head.

"Okay. Well, what I'm going to do is go ahead and call for an ambulance. Alright? You don't look hurt, but if something's wrong then they'll be able to tell us for sure."

As he started to get up she quickly reached for his arm, but he calmed her down and promised that he'd be back as soon as possible.

~ ~ ~

After she'd been taken away to get checked out, the younger officer felt a sudden warmth near his wrist, and as he unwrapped the bandages he discovered that the knife wound he'd sustained earlier that week had healed up completely.

 

[ChasNicollette]

"It cries out in the darkest night and breaks in the morning light."

The dark-haired woman could hardly breathe, and every time she exhaled she exulted obscene demands for more.

There were two people doing things to her at once.

She knelt at the head of a bed, facing the wall, clawing at the headboard with one hand as she bit her lip and tried with her other hand to clutch at the hair of the woman between her legs.

...she was kneeling over this woman's face, this adorable blonde creature, her fingers interlaced with gold, and she was struggling to keep her balance as that woman's tongue roved up and down doing lascivious, lavish, luscious work upon the dark-haired woman's tenderest places.

Complicating matters was the man behind her, plunging into her ass with short, sharp thrusts, like a rabbit mating. His arms were strong as they wrapped around her, and she remembered to be grateful for his holding her up as her two lovers did such fiendishly exquisite things to her.

The dichotomy of it was breathtaking.

The so-bad-it-was-good, so-unpleasant-it-was-pleasure friction of the man's aggressively using her orifice for his own gratification stood out in stark relief against the blonde woman's gleefully and selflessly delighting the dark-haired woman with her mouth, and vice versa. Two so very different forms of fleshly fun, all at once, her mind couldn't handle it, her body just wanted more...

"Unnh, gawd... oh my-- fuck..."

She could feel it, lingering there with her in the darkness, effusive but elusive. She could feel it, that red hot momentum rolling towards a white hot moment in the sun...

"Oh, shit," the dark-haired woman panted, "Please don't stop. Please don't either of you dare fucking stop..."

...almost... almost... almost...

...it was so close she could touch it, so close she could wrap her fingers around it and lift it to her mouth and devour it, feel the juices of it roll down her lips and her cheeks and her chin like some ripe fruit...

...please...

...but then it slipped through her fingers...

...and all of it started to tumble away, like shower steam through an open window...

"No," she croaked in her panic. "Oh please, please don't go--"

But it was too late.

She was awake, and it was over, and it was gone, and the only remnant of the steam of her dream was the cooling sheen of sweat on her skin.

After a moment, even the disorientation faded.

The dark-haired woman remembered her name.

Remembered who and where she was.

Nell Caulder.

Doctor Nell Caulder.

~ ~ ~

http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l325/chasnicollette/Eliza_Dushku_006_zps6315c0f3.jpg

http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l325/chasnicollette/eliza-dushku-nurses-tv-series-promo-hq-01-0750_zps207018a2.jpg

~ ~ ~​

Catching a few precious minutes of sleep between shifts at the hospital, she had somehow managed to dream. Because she always dreamed, these days. Every time she closed her eyes, she dreamed.

Sometimes she dreamed of violence, of-- of war, something old and long-forgotten yet new and real and ongoing... of fighting battles on fronts she couldn't comprehend, of defeating foes and standing strong.

~ ~ ~

http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l325/chasnicollette/Eliza-Dushku-in-Dollhouse-11_zpsdbb7b50c.jpg

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...she was not a violent person and she took her Hippocratic Oath very seriously and these dreams made no sense to her at all, how graphic they were and how ferocious she was.

She didn't even watch action movies.

But more often she dreamed of... fun. The kind of fun with bodies pressed against bodies, of merging and emerging and merging again, of riding and sprawling and kissing and hissing. Multiple partners, always strangers, never with protection...

...the kind of dreams after which she always felt more than a little bit ashamed of herself, like she knew better, even her dreamed-of self should be more responsible than that.

And yet despite the shame there was always that longing, that almost predatory hunger. Like she would give anything for those dreams to come true.

~ ~ ~

http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l325/chasnicollette/72210_zpsf4038ee5.jpg

~ ~ ~​

Sitting up in the disused hospital room, sitting up on the bed, Nell glanced at her phone and frowned to herself as she clawed her hand through her hair.

There was no time now for even a cold shower.

She had to get back to work.

Changing hurriedly into fresh scrubs, she washed her hands and, briefly, her face-- though that didn't help her at all, on the cold shower front --she then stepped back out into the glaring fluorescent lights of St. Christopher's, adjusting the stethoscope where it draped over her shoulders.

"Did you fall asleep?" a voice wondered behind her, and Nell glanced back over her shoulder.

Kate.

Doctor Kate Harvey.

One of Nell's only friends, and the only co-worker she spent any time with outside of the hospital.

~ ~ ~

http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l325/chasnicollette/832787_f520_zpse3af3baa.jpg

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Nell tended to keep herself to herself, but Kate had a way of getting through people's defenses, of being so cheerfully dismissive of carefully-erected boundaries that suddenly bewilderedly even the most socially-backwards of medical professionals found themselves with a lifelong friend and confidante.

"For a little while," Nell replied, smiling faintly.

Kate pointed at her as they strode along the hospital hall together, side by side. "Oh! Oh, man, there's that look again. You're looking wistful."

"I am not looking wistful," Nell snorted.

"So very wistful," Kate shook her head with a sigh, how dare you deny it. "You had one of those dreams."

"And not for the first time I regret telling you about those dreams," Nell grimaced, though good-naturedly.

Kate shrugged. "What? It just means you need to get laid."

"I wonder if that's as bad as telling an alcoholic they need a beer," Nell mused. "You don't get how insatiable my appetites are in these things. I start acting like that in real life, I'll have eight kinds of STIs in a week and will have to run off and hide in the woods so I'm not some kind of modern-day Typhoid Mary."

"As usual," Kate informed Nell, "you're overthinking things."

Nell harrumphed at her fellow brunette. "Then give me something else to think about."

"Things are, actually," Kate admitted, "actually pretty quiet around here right now, quieter even than they usually are this time of night. Probably a calm before a storm, but you never know. Only thing we've got in the waiting room right now is a Jane Doe, BIBA, possibly a Chapter, says she's got some kind of retrograde amnesia, no idea who she is. Not sure if the RNs have checked her blood for whatever fancy cocktail the kids are injecting these days, but either way we're waiting for Psych to come down and have a look at her."

"She's probably scared and disoriented," Nell nodded. "I'll touch base with her before I start making my rounds, see if she needs anything."

"Sounds like a plan," Kate nodded, and started heading off in another direction. "Page me if you need me."

Nell watched Kate go for a moment, and then headed towards Admitting.

...when she got there, she didn't have to ask the desk who Kate had meant.

Nell stopped. And stared. Just for a moment.

And then reminded herself to breathe.

Whoa, girl. Lady's come here for help, not to get drooled on. Keep it in your scrubs, Caulder.

She still needed to take a moment to swig some water and wash her hands again before approaching the young woman.

"Hey," she managed to greet the patient without her voice's cracking too too badly. "I'm Dr. Caulder. Everyone treating you okay? Sorry about the wait, these psych-eval guys can take all night."