Ahhhhhh

[dr_mabeuse]

I confess. I'm one of those writers who will drag out my character's sighs and moans with strings of consonants: "Ahhh" "Ohhhh" and the like. Even "Goddd!" on occasion

I keep my nonverbal vocalizations to a reasonable length: four, maybe five consonants is the maximum. I'm not going to smear a gasp over an entire line of text. But still, I know that there are people who object to this practice.

To me, vocalizations are very sexy and work very well to bring an immediacy to a sex scene. I like them. To those who object to repeated consonants, I say that "Ah" is not the same as "Ahhhh", and neither are the same as saying "she emitting a long, softly aspirated sigh of pleasure between lips slack with desire." This latter, while seeming more literate, doesn;t have the immediacy of a good real-time groan.

So how do you write a long, breathy sigh of pleasure? By calling it a long, breathy sigh of pleasure? I don't want that. I want her to say "Ahhh..."

---dr.M.

 

[Omni]

I am with you Dr M. Just saying gasp, all the time, does not do it for me when I read through what I am trying to convey. I have read here on the boards where other writers feel it is wrong to add the Ah hh's and Oh hh's etc. I thought it about it long and hard and came to the same conclusion I did about nearly everything I have learned or heard about writing. Do it, but if you do, don't do anything too much.

As you said not too of long lines lines of it. Four or five letters is my tops and not line after line of it.

I personally will not keep reading a story with drawn out lines of sounds. Keep it simple and short.

I think it helps the movement of the story, especially since this is erotic content, to add a few lettered sounds at certain climatic moments through a sex scene and not just at the ending orgasmic one!

eek!

Omni

 

[hiddenself]

I think the issue is what letters you repeat. It is rarely the case that consonants are repeated in speech. However, vowel enunciation can be protracted. So:

"Aaaah," can reflect a real utterance.
"Ahhhh," on the other hand, usually can't.

But I agree with the general principle. Phonetically relaying grunts, moans, or other such sounds is fine in written work, as long as it's not absurd or overdone.

 

[Omni]

"Aaaah," can reflect a real utterance.
"Ahhhh," on the other hand, usually can't.

I wonder why the grammar checkers recognize the Ah hh & Oh hh etc and do not the Aaaah?
Not disagreeing at all with you hiddenself. In fact just looking at that Aaaah. I like it better. Good point about consonants. I will be using it as I get tired of using the others too. Variety is the spice!

Good tip,

Omni

 

[HawaiiBill]

Aaaah, yes.

Don't worry about those who dislike any of the choices you make in writing. You will never please everyone. You wouldn't want to!

My question to you would be viewpoint -- okay, earpoint. That wonderful Aaaah, is it being heard by the reader? Presume so. Or is it being heard by a character in the story and he or she is sharing that with the reader?

The sounds of love aren't SAID, in my view.

Consider:

A tender touch brought her pleasure. "Aaaah," she said.

A tender touch brought her pleasure. "Aaaah."

That's quick and bald and I hope it raises a thought that's useful.

 

[MaxSebastian]

Bottom line is, whichever method you use, you still have to rely on the reader's imagination as well as context. In which case, either way is just as good or bad as each other.

I mean, if you go for the description method, saying a woman lets out a low, breathy moan could mean she's highly aroused, it could also mean she's had throat cancer and there's a tube embedded in her throat.

On the other hand, a woman saying "Aaaahhhh" could be merely having her throat checked for signs of tonsilitis, rather than building up to a buttock-wobbling orgasm.

When Sherlock Holmes looks at Watson and says "Aaaahhh", it's because he's made a sudden breakthrough in the case, not because Watson's on his knees challenging the boundaries of popular nineteenth century detective fiction.

You've got to give the reader some credit. And that works for both of those methods.

But for me, it just looks a little amateurish to see someone who has written a string of letters like "Aaaaaawooooga!!!!!".

 

[A7inchPhildo]

What about streaching words then? like,
As he bangs into her I hear, "Uummph, Aaaah, Oooh Yyesss!"

I look to portray some words as we all know during sex get distorted. If I write "Umph, Ah, Oh, Yes!"

Well, I know streaching the "Y" in yes is not a word but my character is not saying yes. He is pausing at different lengths on different letters.

It is a roller coaster word medium length Y short on the E and longer on the S.

Seriously,
If I am wrong in how I portray to my reader? I would like to know what you do? Or is your story bland and proper english in every way?

"Hooked on Phonics?" sound it out. I would rather read "Aaaaaawooooga!". Than the horn had a long pitch that increased then went deep tone finishing with a even deeper base sound lengthy until it spiked up at the end. <-- I still do not know what a model A horn sound is like by the discription.

Don't mean to toot my own horn and wish to learn a more proper way if possible. This is just the way I was taught until now.

Sounds have always been my most difficult part. Since there is no audible in writeing. I do what I think would sound like the noise if sounded out. I know a lot of people butcher sounds but I give them credit for trying. The "!!!!!" Well, could live with out that not a big in my book, but I can sometimes do it as to stress a point not a letter.

Phildo