Age differences

[Bindii]

What do you guys think about age differences in relationships? Have you ever been in a relationship/or are in one now where there was a big age gap between you and your partner?

Is there a point when you think a certain number of years difference is too much? How many years between you and a partner would be too many either way? (not illegal)

My daughters father was 18 yrs my senior (I was 19yrs, he was 37yrs), my ex husband was 10 yrs older than me, but my current SO is three years younger than me.

What is the age difference, if any, between you and your SO and have you encountered any problems with it?

Edited for spelling errors..ooops

 

[april-wine]

When we met I thought she was older, she is 25 I am 34........As for the difference in our ages, that hasn't been a problem.....

 

[Aphrodisiac]

What is the age difference, if any, between you and your SO and have you encountered any problems with it?

I have always gone out with older men , I don't do this on purpose it just seems to happen that way.

Right now I am involved with a man who is 10yrs older then me.
When we first started he was a little hesitant to get close to me because he was not 100 % comfortable with about our age difference, he assumed I would not like him or some thing but I never once thought about his age. We get along very well... he is wonderful.

 

[LovetoGiveRoses]

Not me but a friend/couple

She was 10 years his senior. They were both hardworking and intellectual (she was a banker and he a lawyer). They really clicked mentally and never thought of the difference. When they went out in public it wasn't noticable because she was always very stylishly dressed (somehow that seems to "neutralize" years) and he always looked and acted more mature than his years (got to wear suits for clients). I'm using the past tense cause I lost track of them a couple years ago when I moved. I guess if you click mentally and emotionally, you don't even notice.

 

[p_p_man]

I don't find any problem...

I have relationships with any woman whose base age is in the mid 30s...

 

[Guest]

As long as both partners are of legal age, I believe that age is just a number. Almost everyone I have ever dated has been older than me, and several were 10+ years older.

 

[Bs]

I am 10yrs older than that of my wife. We met I was 28 she was 18. Nobody had a problem with except her adoptive parents. We were married on her 20th birthday.

I love her. But if anything ever happens between us I would NOT go for a younger wife again. I will look for some one 10 to 15 years my senior. I don't want to raise anymore kids!

and this is,

 

[pdx39]

I was in a relationship with a woman 20 years older than myself from 1988 until last year. Love is more important than age.

 

[HotXBunz]

In my first relationship there was a 22 year difference. At that time it seemed okay. As I look back there may have been problems if we had aged together. He being in his seventies and me in my fifties.

In my current relationship there is a nine year age gap. I am in heaven. As a child she spent long summers with cousins my age and identified with the music and cinema of my generation.

 

[batter]

the mrs is 13 years younger than me.

 

[Bindii]

I should have clarified one of the reasons why I asked this question. My friend is 39yrs and she has been involved in a relationship with a 21yr old man, she feels that people must look and whisper comments behind her back when they go out together. This is causing some serious conflict between them. I emailed her a link to this thread this evening and she was surprised that most people are accepting of her relationship. Thank you all for your honest opinions!

 

[Cotedebeaune]

Age difference

The old perennial question and an important one to consider. Age should not matter; but it does, and the proof is that this thread is in full flow with a lot of personal experiences recounted in order to exemplify the problem.
I had 3 relatinonships, in my mid-forties (the "crisis" I hear echoing in my ears!) with girls in their mid-twenties and one with a lovely lady in her late 50's. Though, all to evidently, egos trips for those involved, none were ever destined to last very long for all the obvious reasons. But the one basic ingredient missing was 'true love' and irrespective of age or any other factor, without it any relationship is precarious.
Now older and hopefully wiser I still don't have a definitve answer and each individual case has to be assessed on it's own merits and the personalities of those involved. Never-the-less the age gap is still a crucial element when considering the long term implications on each other and any offspring.
Let's believe in the old adage that "Love conquers all!"

 

[hatara]

It's Who You Are

Ok I have to admit I am 35 and returned to college and I have a lot of 22 year olds ask me out. For the most part I say I date 25 and older. It's not that I wouldn't consider someone younger than 25 it really depends on the person. I want someone that has been out there a little like I have and knows what a struggle it is.

If the guy your friend is dating is emotionally making her happy then that is what it's all really about.

As for older I don't have any limitations at all once again it's who he is as a person and how he makes me feel.

I wish your friend all the luck in the world and if the 2 of them are happy with their relationship then nothing else matters.

 

[VanB]

Age differences make no difference if two people are in tune with each other and real soul mates. Ultimately who cares what other people think = it's what goes on inside your relationship that's important.

The problem can come (and I;ve seen this happen) when you have a large age difference, in the case I'm thinking of she was 25 he was 55. It's fine when the relationship starts but 15 years later - well let's just say that you can grow a lot older between 55 and 70 than you do between 25 and 40.

 

[Cotedebeaune]

Age differences make no difference if two people are in tune with each other and real soul mates. Ultimately who cares what other people think = it's what goes on inside your relationship that's important.

The problem can come (and I;ve seen this happen) when you have a large age difference, in the case I'm thinking of she was 25 he was 55. It's fine when the relationship starts but 15 years later - well let's just say that you can grow a lot older between 55 and 70 than you do between 25 and 40.

Thanks for the warning

 

[Debbie]

First hubby was 6 years my senior.

I am 32, second hubby is 46. Age doesn't make that much of a difference. (As long as you are of legal age that is)

I love my hubby and that's what counts. The age difference means nothing to me. It was who I married, not his age that mattered.


My best friend of 10 years is married to a man 10 years her junior. They have been married 14 years.

(edited 'cos I put senior originally LOL Must be time for bed)

Nite all.

 

[GuyJD]

I've been in two such relationships. Several years ago, I was 35 dating an 18 year old young lady. Most recently, I was 37 while my girlfriend was 20. But as it stands, I don't intend on dating women who are that much younger than me anymore. It mostly depends on their maturity.

 

[lovetoread]

My man is almost 13 years older than me. Other than my teasing him about it,it means nothing in our relationship.

 

[SweetBrat73]

I've always dated men that were older than me...with a few exceptions. Most were 10 to 20 years older. I found that men my age were immature. Untill I met my SO,who is a year younger than me, I never thought I'd date a man my age again...I was wrong!!! Thank God I seriously don't think age has anything to do with a relationship if you are both in love and have something besides sex in a relationship...althought my just sex relationships weren't all bad...just lacking


Brat

 

[xx_La_Reina_xx]

We don't even notice...

I don't think age is really a factor. I know some 18 year olds who act like they are 40, and I also know some 40 year olds who act like they are 12.

On that note, I will say that my s/o, Wise, and I are 18 years apart. He is 42 and I am 24. On a day to day basis, our age difference rarely comes up...well except maybe in a joke or two

When we first met, we did not intend to have a relationship, it is something that just developed. The evolution of our relationship is something that I consider very,very special. We grew together learning to communicate and trust, and the outcome has been a wonderful relationship built on a firm foundation that can (and WILL) withstand any obstacle. I just can't imagine something so trivial as our age difference keeping us apart.


*smile* Reina

 

[wiseholyone]

age difference

Until I met Reina I never considered having a s/o with an age difference like we have. I was always looking for women around my age. I must say that this has been the most wonderful relationship I have ever been in.

The trust that has been built is unbelievable. We tell each other everything that is going on, even if it's something that the other person is not going to like. We bring it out in the open and talk it out.

We have gone through the same problems as any other couple but it just goes to show you that age doesn't really matter. This is something that I would have never believed until I met Reina.

PS......and the sex

Thanks Reina for being my best friend, my lover, and the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with

WISE

 

[Bindii]

Gee Reina and Wise, I was really touched by your words. I'm sure that my friend will also appreciate your honesty and loving words too.

Thanks

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

Bindii

My Brother called me one day and said that he wanted me to meet his new g/f. I said " cool". He then says "I should let you know that she is older then me". I say to him "Does she make you happy?" His reply is "Yes". "Then it doesn't matter what I or anyone else think. If you are happy and She is happy, that is all that matters". He says " well she is 20 years older then me". My reply was "When you goning to be here and do you want something to eat?"

I think my brother was used to the flak that he got about THEIR relasionship from everyone that he expected it from me too. I tell you folk there are enough problems with MY life, I don't need to go looking into someone elses for more.

Holden

 

[Bindii]

Its a pity that more people don't think like that Holden.

 

[jass1960]

My daughters father was 18 yrs my senior (I was 19yrs, he was 37yrs),(gravedigger) my ex husband was 10 yrs older than me, but my current SO is three years younger than me (cradle snatcher) .