Absolutely free to a good home - you pay shipping

[Shy Tall Guy]

One 47 year old (slightly bent/broken) human male. Requires special care; massages, chiropractic care - and you cannot feed him anything with Gluten in it.

He can make money if supplied with a job, but since his spine doesn't work so well anymore, the job must be mental not physical. His mind is in very good shape - though he sometimes forgets things and is very opinionated. He still has another decade or two left in him and is otherwise physically capable of years of good sexual service - although he will be "fixed" before being shipped to your location. Indeed, he is oversexed so be prepared to handle those needs.

He is good around kids, very even tempered and kind - he doesn't bite or growl, even if teased around his food bowl.

He does have a few bad habits:

When taken off leash near a motorcycle he takes off on the bike for hours on end and sometimes is brought back home by local law enforcement for going too fast (although he pays for his own speeding tickets).

He procrastinates, spends too much time online, and hates the cold and rain. He is not afraid of thunderstorms - in fact he seems to revel in them, and he likes to go for walks on the beach.

If you have a good home somewhere west of the Missisippi and have room for this cute human male, let me know and maybe he can be under your Xmas tree this year.

 

[freakygirl]

One 47 year old (slightly bent/broken) human male. Requires special care; massages, chiropractic care - and you cannot feed him anything with Gluten in it.

He can make money if supplied with a job, but since his spine doesn't work so well anymore, the job must be mental not physical. His mind is in very good shape - though he sometimes forgets things and is very opinionated. He still has another decade or two left in him and is otherwise physically capable of years of good sexual service - although he will be "fixed" before being shipped to your location. Indeed, he is oversexed so be prepared to handle those needs.

He is good around kids, very even tempered and kind - he doesn't bite or growl, even if teased around his food bowl.

He does have a few bad habits:

When taken off leash near a motorcycle he takes off on the bike for hours on end and sometimes is brought back home by local law enforcement for going too fast (although he pays for his own speeding tickets).

He procrastinates, spends too much time online, and hates the cold and rain. He is not afraid of thunderstorms - in fact he seems to revel in them, and he likes to go for walks on the beach.

If you have a good home somewhere west of the Missisippi and have room for this cute human male, let me know and maybe he can be under your Xmas tree this year.

Does he do dishes? Windows? Toilets? Or is he atleast trainable?

 

[Silverlily]

If you have a good home somewhere west of the Missisippi

Oh, thanks, like I needed yet another reason to hate Maryland.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: Re: Absolutely free to a good home - you pay shipping

Does he do dishes? Windows? Toilets? Or is he atleast trainable?

He does dishes and windows gladly. Toilets only if forced to (he would rather pay someone to come in and do those chores). He is very trainable, but dominant, not submissive and not likely to change very much. So those thinking of making him submissive, or training him to do something he doesn't like - forget it, he is pretty stubborn that way.

He even takes out the garbage and cooks (although his cooking is not that good).

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: Re: Absolutely free to a good home - you pay shipping

Oh, thanks, like I needed yet another reason to hate Maryland.

He worries excessively when he cannot visit his children periodically, and they would miss him too. So it would be best if someone in the Pacfic NorthWet or west of the Rockies adopted him, but a good home west of the Missisippi would be considered. He does like it in the warmer climes, and he does have quite a bit of stuff to take with him, so shipping costs would not be small, but they would be manageable.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Also, you should be willing to undergo an extensive and lengthy interview process to make sure he is going to a good home, and that he will be happy there. I don't think he can stand to be uprooted too many more times, so I want to make sure where he goes will be something reasonably permanent.

 

[Rrrosyn]

How's his sex drive? Is he bedroom broken?

Provided with a place to live and a newspaper, why can't he find his own fucking job?

City or country?

How does he get along with cats and tarantulas?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

How's his sex drive?

Very high. He is an anal virgin, and he has this desire for menage a trois sex, but if that isn't possible then he can be kept happy in other ways.

Is he bedroom broken?

That depends on what you mean by "broken" - again, he is not submissive, but he can do lots of other tricks in the bedroom. Being 47, previously married with children, he does not need a lot of training; he knows the basics, and is pretty flexible. He is not into scat, watersports of extreme pain, but he can administer spankings and will role play if you wish him too (but only in the bedroom - he likes independent, intelligent women).

Provided with a place to live and a newspaper, why can't he find his own fucking job?

He will find his own job, indeed he has done fairly well at that up to now. He was laid off early this year and we decided to put him out to pasture for a while so he could rest. He has been working very hard for over 30 years and he deserved a short rest. He is willing and able to go back to work now. He comes with his AKC papers (a EE degree and 15 years experience in software engineering), so it shouldn't be hard for him to find a job, even in today's market.

City or country?

He lives in a small city now, but dislikes big cities except to visit - he loves the countryside; he needs room to run - he is a big boy with long legs (he is 6'6" and 240#).

How does he get along with cats and tarantulas?

He gets along fine with cats - he was raised with them so no problem there as long as the cats are friendly. Tarantulas? Hmmm, he does have a fear of small spiders, and he was even nervous around his daughter's gerbils when they were crawling on him, so if you kept the spiders from crawling on him he would probably be okay.

 

[Rrrosyn]

Kewl.

Smoke?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Kewl.

Smoke?

Nope - and he is not compatible with smokers. He used to smoke but we broke him of that habit over 15 years ago. Now he doesn't like the smell of smoke and won't kiss smokers. Is that a problem?

By the way - he has been to your part of the country and likes it there. He had a friend, now deceased, that had a resort near Castle Crags, and he likes the area (lots of good roads to ride his motorcycles on, and the weather is nice too).

 

[Rubyfruit]

Oh fuck me!

I thought I was replying to a PM.

Quietly leaving the thread. Sorry for the intrusion.

Ruby

 

[Rrrosyn]

Nope - and he is not compatible with smokers. He used to smoke but we broke him of that habit over 15 years ago. Now he doesn't like the smell of smoke and won't kiss smokers. Is that a problem?

Problem? Ha! Exact same views here.

Drink?

However, the fact that you like the area could be a character flaw. I live on the dry, dreay lava flats. *grumble* Prefer pine to juniper.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Drink?

Grape and other fruit juices

No he doesn't drink anymore; he got carried away with alcohol when he was a teenager and it just doesn't interest him anymore. He has no moral objection to it, and he might even drink some wine once in a while if it was not of the dry variety and he had company to drink it with. But nothing more than a glass or too.

However, the fact that you like the area could be a character flaw. I live on the dry, dreay lava flats. *grumble* Prefer pine to juniper.

Well he prefers not to be in the desert, I was thinking more along the lines of the Redding area and north up to Shasta. He prefers the trees and the mountains, and when he was last there (last year) there were plenty of those nearby.

 

[Rrrosyn]

Desert? It's been snowing. but, I agree with what it looks like. I am north of the mountain. Redding is too hot in the summer. Souldn't mind being in Scott Valley.


Oh and I don't drink.

Drugs?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Drugs?

Nope - he don't take most drugs, just aspirin and the occasional prescription painkiller when his back is too much for him. He has an addictive personality so he avoids such things if possilbe. He still has left over painkillers from when he crushed his foot (all well now) 5 years ago - but they are too strong for anything now.

He has had all his shots and no STDs either. He does prefer sunny climes to the wet and dreary northwet. He will be "fixed" before being shipped, so if you are looking at him for his genes to raise new young ones, that will not be possible. He alread yhas a daughter, and she is going to provide him with grandchildren someday soon, and he is happy with that and doesn't want any more children of his own.

 

[Gilly Bean]

I would take him, if it weren't for the fact that I live in an area commonly referred to as hell frozen over. -sighs-

And I could really use the extra income, and another man to do the dishes. Is he opposed to the MMF threesome aspect? -grins-

 

[Rrrosyn]

My drugs are all prescription, but strong.

Not to fond of the current pre-snow weather myself. I just hate it HOT.

Fixed? LMAO Funny man. Humor is good. I'm was "fixed" in July.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

I would take him, if it weren't for the fact that I live in an area commonly referred to as hell frozen over. -sighs-

And I could really use the extra income, and another man to do the dishes. Is he opposed to the MMF threesome aspect? -grins-

He much prefers MFF, but would engage in MMF if there were a tit for tat arrangement.

As for income - most of his goes to pay bills and to his retirement fund, so if you are looking for a sugar daddy you should look elsewhere. He makes good money when he works (much better than average), and he comes with some exercised stock options that might be worth something someday, but just as you would expect him to pull his own weight, so he expects the same of others. He has already had one bad experience with a woman who only wanted to sleep and shop while he worked his ass off, so he is leery of anybody looking at him as an income source.

Don't get me wrong, he is not a skinflint and is generous, but his generosity has been abused in the past, and he wants to be needed for himself, not for his money.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

My drugs are all prescription, but strong.

Not to fond of the current pre-snow weather myself. I just hate it HOT.

Fixed? LMAO Funny man. Humor is good. I'm was "fixed" in July.

Well then he might not need to be "fixed" - but it might be safer. He is just a little paranoid about that; there was this one bitch who tried to use him for breeding purposes only and that was a true mess even though she wasn't successful.

 

[Gilly Bean]

Hmm... Does he do diapers? Already stated, he does dishes. BUT... does he do them without complaining?


And a MFF threesome could be arranged, provided he could find the female.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Hmm... Does he do diapers?

Not willingly - he can't standthe smell.

Already stated, he does dishes. BUT... does he do them without complaining?

He does them now without complaining, although they sometimes pile up before he feels like doing them. He is not a domestic type person, but he does his share.

And a MFF threesome could be arranged, provided he could find the female.

Hmm... he is not very good at finding females, that is one of the reasons this ad is here.