A story idea: The Incredible Hunk

Ansi

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Hi, all!

Since this is the Story Ideas board, I wanted to get an opinion on a story idea I've had in my head for a while now. I personally like it, and think it could be really good quality-wise (i.e. not plotless smut) if I ever get around to writing it.

Just so you know, the story is rather fantastical, i.e. it hinges on comic-book sci-fi. I know that the majority of stories on Lit are 'realistic', and I know some of you don't care for overly-fantastical stories. Still, I think it has great potential (both sexually and literary)...I'd like to know what you all think of it.

A word of warning: the synopsis is rather long. I've been thinking in great detail :p



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Story: "The Incredible Hunk" - An erotic take-off of the original comic story.


The story centers on a young man, a college senior attending Generic University (or whatever...it's not important where he goes). He's very much a nerd; he's overweight, unpopular, and very shy. He only has two real friends; the leader of the university's science club, and a cute female classmate who works with him as a study and project partner (and who he secretly is in love with, but is too shy to say anything).

One day, while helping the science club guys with a lab experiment, our hero accidentally gets a sizable dose of untested radiation. Fortunately, he doesn't die...indeed, he doesn't seem to be affected at all. Baffled, the medics allow him to go on his way.

Later that day, he is set upon by one of the popular girls (you know the type), who have taken to cock-teasing him for their own mean-spirited amusement. She proceeds to get a rise out of him, only to laugh in his face.

As the resultant horniness and frustration set in, he starts feeling ill...he dashes outside just in time to see his body transforming. His skin turns green, his body becomes huge and massively muscular, and his cock grows to elephantine proportions.

Gone is our shy, lovable hero. There is now only the Hunk...a massive, muscular *brick* of a creature with an impossibly huge penis. His mind is gone...he is driven solely by lust. Years of pent-up horniness and sexual frustration boil to the surface as the Hunk sets out to sate his monsterous libido.

Thus the premise is set. Whenever our hero becomes too sexually aroused, he becomes the Hunk, who prowls the university campus like an animal, hunting for pussy. One by one, he corners the school's sexiest girls and has his way with them. Each time the scenario is the same; he follows them until no one else is around, overpowers them, and rapes them. Well, "rape" isn't exactly right...though they always resist at first, the girls are soon begging for more of his monster member. ;)

Every time, our hero wakes up back in his dorm, his clothes tattered, with no memory of what happened. This cycle continues for a good few weeks, with over a dozen girls ending up on the business end of the Hunk's cock. Rumors start to circulate of a "huge green monster" stalking and sexually assaulting girls on the university grounds. The police and campus security try to look into things, but the Hunk's sporadic appearences make it very difficult...especially since the creature's victims don't seem to mind... :cool:

Eventually, the Hunk is caught on film by reporters from the university newspaper. OUr hero reads the paper, and begins to fear that his blackouts may be more dangerous than he thought...

One night, our hero wakes up to find himself naked and next to a girl who looks like she's been fucked with a cum-spraying firehose. Putting two and two together, he realizes that HE'S the "monster" in the paper.

The realization takes a heavy emotional toll on him. Not only has he been sexually assaulting these poor (lucky?) women, but he has no control over his alter-ego; it's only a matter of time before the Hunk ends up hurting somebody. Frightened for the sake of the female student body, he confides in his friend in the science club. Together, the two work towards finding a cure.

...but it may already be too late. The Hunk's assaults have been getting more and more violent; one girl has already been hospitalized. Our hero fears it is only a matter of time before he outright kills someone.

Even worse is the issue of his female friend/crush. Ever the empathic one, she's become worried over his strange disappearences and sudden aloofness. The poor hero is worried for her safety; given his romantic feelings toward her, she could easily be the Hunk's next target. Ultimately, he decides that the only way to protect her is to stay away from her for good...



Will our hero be able to conquer his inner sex demon? Will he be able to protect the woman he loves from...himself? Will the women of Generic University continue to be terrorized by the Hunk, and if not, will they be sorry to see him go? Will anyone stomach this ridiculous premise?


...I guess we'll have to wait until I write the thing to find out. :)



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So, people...what's the verdict? I'm really interested in hearing what everyone has to say. Though I've never released a written work before, I do have extensive practice (I'm working on a facfiction novel as we speak), and I'm sure I could write this into a quality erotic/romantic story eventually. Hell, I've even got some ideas for sequels. :rolleyes:
 
Sounds like good stuff! Definitely give it a try. One thing that might be complicated from a narrative perspective is how you deal with the shifts from the normal guy to the hunk. You can't really show the hulk's thoughts, because he's going to be extremely primal, not really have thoughts as such. So then you're just describing the action, which can get kinda dull.

Here's how I, personally, would approach it:

Most of the story told in a third-person perspective way about our hero--when the guy is being teased, talk about his feelings and such. He runs outside, kneels down, and his mind goes blank, etc.
At this point, switch the narrative around to tell the story of the woman who's about to be ravaged--she's unsuspectingly walking down the hall, talking on her cellphone, thinking about buying a new pair of shoes; then she sees this big, brutish green hunk of a guy coming toward her etc. Basically, an out-of-body experience for the reader, who's used to following the main hero. We don't get inside the head of the brute, and this way he becomes a third character, very distinctly different from the main guy. I don't know if I explained that very well, but one of the other advantages is that you can work around the rape issue by switching to following the female character--show her thoughts, show her reluctance and willingness. There would be a certain sameness in the thoughts (or lack there-of) going on in the mind of the hunk, but you can keep in interesting by exploring the thoughts of the partners/victims.

And make sure there's at least one incident where he gets it on with a sexy professor!!! Oh, and one with the geeky school-newspaper photographer girl!!

Good luck with it!
 
Sounds good

Go for it.
Get off your lazy slackass and write it! (Your words)
:D

I like fogbank's ideas on how to handle the actual sex and the non-rape sex scenes. That could work. Otherwise, it could get boring. And, you don't want the character to be seen as a rapist. Like the real hulk, (Who I saw in Norm's having dinner with his mom one night long ago), he should be a nice guy who is misunderstood.

And, he MUST get together with his friend sooner or later, maybe after she gets involved on doing "experiments" in his behaviour and how to fix him. Maybe she gets it accidentaly while helping him through an episode?

And, the Professor and the photographer girl cracked me up.
Yeah, they MUST be there somewhere!:p
 
Foghat, you pretty much hit it on the head. That's exactly what I'd planned to do...switching perspectives to show 'the monster' from an exterior angle. This helps illustrate him as the primal, mindless, impersonal guy he is. Also, from a sexual perspective, it's more interesting to focus on the girls than the Hunk...they have thoughts, emotions and reactions to expound on, whereas the Hunk doesn't.

And Magicfingers...the female friend definitely plays a crucial role in the story, as well as "getting it" (though not in the way you'd expect). It may not seem like she's an important character from my synopsis, but she is...it's just tough to explain her role without spoiling the plot. I *hate* spoilers.

Speaking of the plot, I've pretty much got the whole thing worked out, from beginning to end. The only real plot-crafting left to to is deciding on the various 'scenes' of the Hunk's victims (i.e. who he goes after, what happens, etc). I've left that part vague, since you can plug just about any kind of person/scenario in there and not affect the main plotline.

Heh heh...yeah, expect a sexy professor to turn up in there. Sure, it's cliched, but only because it's too good to *not* use. :D

Also, about the reporter...I actually had such a thing planned as part of the plot. A sexy reporter chick and her cameraman go out at twighlight to look for the Hunk, who gets caught on camera as he...uh, "interviews" the reporter. ;) The Hunk being confirmed as 'not just a rumor' is an important part of the story, so the scene isn't just gratuitous.

One last thing, MF...the hero being "misunderstood" is a central part of the storyline. Once he finds out what he is, he suffers constant internal conflict...he hates his other self for what he's done, and is frightened by his inability to control the Hunk. It's very much like the original Hulk character.




...the more I think about it, the more I think I might very well write this story. Maybe not right NOW, but soon. I need some free time first.


By the way...is it just me, or does anyone else think it's really difficult to write erotic fiction? Personally, I find a hard time concentrating on writing, especially when you can barely keep both hands on the keyboard. Heh.
 
I've done dozen of super hero parodies

justice league, batdude, spiderman, hulk similar to how u described with green sperm and all, DD as well as a few others but usually i keep them short origin like stories.

good luck puny human
 
Re: I've done dozen of super hero parodies

GratefulFred said:
justice league, batdude, spiderman, hulk similar to how u described with green sperm and all, DD as well as a few others but usually i keep them short origin like stories.

good luck puny human
Hey, when are you gonna post "Jismism"?
 
I for one love erotic stories based on comic books.While the Hulk is very "dumb",he does usually speak in the comic book series(unlike the movie and tv series).So maybe when he becomes horny he could say aomething like;"Puny woman think she can take Hulks
dick!Ha!"or,when he's about to blow his load;"Ugh!Hulk cum!"
The idea of a very horny Hulk running around sounds hilarious.
 
No doubt General Ross with his small penis would have to exterminate a hung Hulk to passify his ego.
 
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