A rather tame question...

[BrenVarouse]

Hi all. Thanks for taking the time to look at my post. Extra thanks to those of you who actually respond.

I need advice on how to ask out a girl. ( I can hear the snickers already)

It goes like this. Four years ago my ex and I were sitting in my room watching tv. This is before we were together. Any way the show we were watching ended and before either of us really new what was going on I had her bare tits in my hands and we were kissing passionately... so progressed our four year love affair until about 7 weeks ago when she broke up with me. She was my first... everything. So you see I've never asked a girl out before. It just kind of happened.

Here's the problem. There is a girl that I know from college who once told me that if I wasn't with my gf she would like to sleep with me. At the time I thought nothing more of it, I was still madly in love with my ex. But now is a different story. I've always found her attractive and we have been friends for two years. The other night we were out with a bunch of our school friends and she made it fairly clear that she is still interested in me. After finally reconciling that I may not be ready for a new relationship but I am ready to have a little fun I have decided to ask her out. Problem is I don't know how.

This is where you fine people come in. Just a little friendly advice is all I need. How should I ask her out? on the phone, in person, e-mail? Where should we go? Dinner, drinks, movie, play?

Any help, advice or anecdotes welcome. Thank you.

 

[Weird Harold]

I've always found her attractive and we have been friends for two years. The other night we were out with a bunch of our school friends and she made it fairly clear that she is still interested in me. After finally reconciling that I may not be ready for a new relationship but I am ready to have a little fun I have decided to ask her out. Problem is I don't know how.

This is where you fine people come in. Just a little friendly advice ...

If you have known her for two years, you should have some idea of what she likes to do. All you need to do is ask her if she would like to do something with you.

There just isn't any one way to ask someone on a date. It isn't as if you're proposing and need a ring and a romantic situation where you can kneel down and beg her to marry you.

A simple, "Hey, want to go to dinner and a movie Saturday?" is usually all it takes -- and whether you ask it on the phone, in an e-mail, or when you see her around the campus doesn't really make any difference.

 

[Native Alien]

just my opinion

but i think that Harold hit the nail on the head with this one. sounds good to me.

 

[shelley23]

If you find it hard or you are shy about asking her to her face for fear of rejection why not ask her in a text message? i pressume that because you are friends with her you would have her number.
It kind of a cowards way, but easier if you get all flustered and dont know what to say, also if she says no (which im sure she wont!) you can just send her a text saying " ok just friends it is" or somthing to the likeness and then it will be easier to just carry on being friends...
Just a thought! Good luck!

 

[capricious_chic]

If you are fairly sure she is not going to say no, then there should be no trepidation about asking her out. Any way that you do so, will be a step in the direction you want to go.. so any of the above would work.

Now if you want to dazzle her, you could always send her flowers (or something along those lines.. something you know she would like.. concert tickets, candy, etc..) with a note asking if she would be interested in a night out.. doing whatever it is you know she likes to do, as you have been friends for so long.

Be sure that on the date, you communicate openly about not being ready to get involved in another relationship.. but would like to date/hang out and have fun.

 

[Lust Engine]

The ol' Nike adage works fine...

Just Do It!

Just call her up without the pretense of a FORMAL date in mind. Ask her if she'd like to join you for a movie, dinner, monster truck rally or wahtever might be of interest to you both.

No need to put all this pressure of "OMIGOD- I'm asking someone out!" on yourself. It need not be so formalized or so tension fraught. Most of my "dates" have just been simple meals with no preconceived ideas about it. I want to spend a few hours out of my day with you & that's it... if it leads to more then whoopee! But it never starts out with the "whoopee" in mind.

You seem like a pretty nice guy & the gal seems interested too. Go for it. Let the friendship develop naturally & don't rush it or put any pressure on yourself as to where it needs to go.

Good luck!

 

[BrenVarouse]

Thank you all for the good advice. I think I'll work up my courage and give her a call.

 

[Golden Eyes]

Just ask her. Say, hey would you like to get a cup of coffe, or have dinner with me. Thats all. How old are you ? You sound young. Just have fun, hang out with her. She already said she wanted to be with you right? Take it slowly.....then see what happens

Let me know how it goes ok?

GE

 

[Noneyabizness]

Re: Re: A rather tame question...

If you have known her for two years, you should have some idea of what she likes to do. All you need to do is ask her if she would like to do something with you.

There just isn't any one way to ask someone on a date. It isn't as if you're proposing and need a ring and a romantic situation where you can kneel down and beg her to marry you.

A simple, "Hey, want to go to dinner and a movie Saturday?" is usually all it takes -- and whether you ask it on the phone, in an e-mail, or when you see her around the campus doesn't really make any difference.

Harold gave the best answer...follow his advice.

 

[Lust Engine]

Thank you all for the good advice. I think I'll work up my courage and give her a call.

RAH RAH RAH!!!! Cheering you forward & wishing you the best of times!

 

[Hairgrip]

Um... no advice - I have no idea about such matters myself (the subtle way that i made it clear to my partner that i rather liked him was to take him home, sit him on the sofa and start holding hands... must have done something right, well either that or he was so scared that he had no idea how to refuse!). So anyhow, the whole point of this obscure message was to say BONNE CHANCE! Good Luck! Pob Luc! and please let us know how it goes (if the result is not too painful)

Hxx