A question to the sexually Active!!

[theshadow]

Okay people I would like your advice please..

Last nite I booked a lovely hotel for me and my girlfriend to go and make love for the 1st time. Im a virgin and it was my VERY 1st TIME being with someone and being touched sexually by someone else..

Well as we both got down to it a few things happened..

I got an erection.. but as she was masterbating me and performing oral on me, my erection dissapeared and took a LONG time to return.. Every time it returned the same thing happened..

Well later in the evening my erection returned, so we used a condom, and the erection dissapeared as I put the condom on.. we did this twice but to no avail..

My girlfriend is an amazing sexy girl, with an amazing body and personality.. I AM ATTRACTED TO HER.. on my own and when we have phone sex I can get it up and stay up till i orgasm.. but last nite was very dissapointing and now she has doubts about the way I feel for her..

Im not on any medication, so is this normal for people's 1st times? Im 24 years old and the years of inactivity may have permanently fucked me up..


Any advice??

 

[Pdxmwm]

RELAX

The chances are it’s nothing but nerves. Be open with her and tell her of your virgin status. She’ll probably take you under her wing and be very helpful. Your years of inactivity haven’t hurt you physically, and years from now you’ll most likely look back on this experience and chuckle about it.

In the bigger picture; if in making love with a woman, you can forget intercourse as an objective, and in stead, focus on pleasure, however you can give it, several things will happen. You’ll put less pressure on yourself, discover dozens of ways to please your woman, and when it’s right, intercourse will just happen.

Good Luck To You…

 

[becca80]

Well.. I don't know if it's "normal" or not, but I can tell you that when my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time (he was a virgin), he also had problems with the condom. He lost his erection as he was fumbling with the condom. He was a little nervous, and I guess he took too long to figure out how to put it on.

IMHO, sometimes when sex is "planned," it becomes a little more nerve-wracking. Maybe you could try going through with it during one of your make-out sessions instead, when things start to get really heated up...

To resolve our problem, I waited for a day close to "that time of the month" and went all the way with him while we were making out, without the condom. I wouldn't really recommend that though.. safety first, of course.. but I can say we never had that problem again.

 

[aramera]

Hi there, your problem is realy no problem.

Relax, don't go to any great trouble to set it up, drift into it with a glass of wine or other mild drink [helps to relax body and mind] and just talk and cuddle and it will happen. In regard to the condom, if your GF is willing ,let her put in on for you during the playing period. Relax and all will be well.

 

[cmbtengnr]

chill out

Just go with the flow. When you go through the trouble of setting up a big show for your girl, You just make everything harder on youreself. Take it slow and easy. It will be rememberable either way. If you go to the trouble of setting the stage with Motels and dinner, or if you just let it happen. You will learn in life when you apply pressure you dont do as well.

So go at it like a playstation game.........JUST HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!


Peace out

 

[schatz]

I would say it's nothing more than a case of nerves. The first time can be an awkward experience. People wonder if they'll be able to please their partner, how well they'll perform, will it live up to expectations...yada yada yada...the list goes on and on. I was nervous my first time and also had trouble keeping erect. Take your time, relax and reassure that you find her attractive but you are just nervous and your erection(or lack of one) is not a reflection of your feelings for her.

 

[The Gimp]

Think back on the first time you did anything else cool. Whether it was falling off of a bike, getting rescued from the deep end of the pool or hitting a mailbox post trying to paralell park it's always stressful the first time. Just relax and this time next week you'll be knocking it out like a porn star.

 

[blueyedheartbandit]

nerves my friend nerves. try having a drink before so you will be relaxed.