A little help please.

Great story!

Makeup sex is always the best.....hehe. I had a difficult time reading through the character buildup, but I think that it did a wonderful job of describing what she was going thru. The intimate scene was very sensual, and passionate. Have the two of you ever written other stories together, I would love to read those as well.
 
Thanks for the FB we haven't written anything else together yet but we will no doubt.
 
It reads quite well and has good characters and imagination.
A fair number of small defects of spelling/grammar/ punctuation.

As stated, perhaps, a little unbalanced in emphasis given to their prehistory, and life stories. It's a little unclear what the problem was, why each thinks the other is cold and rejecting; given that it's occurred over years, it's a little surprising that it's sorted out in (what seems like) 10 minutes.

Lots of writing skill and human understanding; just needs that final proofread. Good work.
 
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