A bumper sticker that made me chuckle

[SeaCat]

Seen on a car today in Palm Beach County.

"My country invaded Iraq
And all I got was this expensive gas."

Also seen on another car. A beat up older Toyota had a tag.
"Jay Low"

Cat

 

[R. Richard]

The best bumper sticker I have ever seen was:
"Autie Em, hate you, hate Kansas, leaving, taking the dog."

 

[starrkers]

My favourite, seen on a clapped out old rustbucket (around the time the "My other car is a *something pretentious and expensive* stickers were all the rage):

"My other car is a piece of shit too"

 

[TxRad]

An old man used to come into town ever so often

On the work box of his old truck was a sticker that said, "Whips and Chains Excite Me"

Someone asked if he was in to bdsm...

He gave them a funny look and replied, "No I just want to come to town alone and that sticker keeps the wife from riding with me."

 

[john-the-author]

One of my sisters just sent me:

* Guns don't kill people. George W. Bush does.
* "Yeeeeeeeehaw!" is not a foreign policy.

And one of the buttons that I wrote for the button company I sell to also became a bumper sticker:

* I never thought I'd miss Nixon.

 

[Lisa Denton]

Best neighbors I ever had, 2 ladies who were quiet, no parties, no fights, kept the yard nice and always had a smile and a wave. They lived beside me for about 7 months.

Had an older but clean car, one bumper sticker:

"Homophobia is a social disease"

 

[Lisa Denton]

I saw a parked car and the bumper stickers had me really curious about who drove it. There was two right together:

"Frodo Lives!!!"
"Gun control means using both hands"

 

[Stella_Omega]

My neighbor has one that says; "Elect Tom Waits"

I asked "Elect him for what? and he said "anything!"

 

[Horus_rules]

Jesus Loves You!everyone else thinks your an asshole.

 

[christabelll]

One was

Lick Bush


another

There is too much blood in my caffiene system


and my personal fave

Hey! Who replaced my Broom with a Mop?

 

[cloudy]

"Yeeeeeeeehaw!" is not a foreign policy.

I want this one.

 

[glynndah]

I want this one.

I'd recommend this place: Northern Sun.

 

[Vermilion]

I'm not Xian, but I did find 'Jesus is for life, not just for Christmas' amusing...

x
V

 

[Stella_Omega]

I remember seeing one back in the 90's-- it said; "I'd kill Flipper for a tuna sandwich."

I couldn't agree with it, but at least the guy knew what the issue was...

 

[TE999]

Another classic is: "Don't tailgate me or I'll flick a booger on your windshield".

It's usually on some POS rustbucket held together with duct tape and wire.

 

[Vermilion]

If you can read this bumper sticker you're so close to my arse you'd better be wearing a condom...


I just made that up, but it made me giggle so I thought I'd share.
x
V

 

[MrsDeathlynx]

"I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it."

I had that one on my car with a magnet, someone stole it...

 

[baccgirl]

Aussie bumper stickers

"Welcome to Australia....NOW GO HOME"

Our emergency phone number here is 000...so....
"Ring 000...make a cop come"
I put that one on the bumper of a cop car...made for an awesome giggle.

On the back of a rusted out ute (in USA I think they are called tray trucks)
"Get in, sit down, shut up, hang on"

When you do a good deed, get a receipt in case heaven is like the IRS.
Stoplights timed for 30 mph are also timed for 60 mph.
Every time you open your mouth, some idiot starts talking.
I'm out of estrogen and I've got a gun!
Well, this day was a total waste of makeup
The more you complain the longer God makes you live

 

[rgraham666]

One I saw years ago and stuck in my mind for some strange reason.

Rugby players eat their dead.

 

[McKenna]

"Yeeeeeeeehaw!" is not a foreign policy.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

[R. Richard]

When I lived at the beach this bumper sticker was popular:

"Tourist go home! [But leave your daughter.]"

 

[Weird Harold]

On the back of a rusted out ute (in USA I think they are called tray trucks)
"Get in, sit down, shut up, hang on"

Ute as in "Utility truck?"

I've never heard of a "tray truck," but I think a "Ute" is probably either a "delivery van" or a "Pickup."

My Mom's favorite:

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

 

[buxxxom]

Not a bumper sticker, but seen recently on the back of a tee shirt worn by motorcycle operator: "If you can read this, the bitch fell off."

 

[SeaCat]

I've seen a few more lately that got me chuckling. (Okay so I've been watching for them.)

On the back of a County Sherrifs Cruiser
"That's Mr. Pig to You"

In the window of a Pickup
"There's a place for all of Gods Creatures.
Right next to the Mashed Potatoes and Gravy"

On the back of a very muddy Jeep (Where did he find mud?)
"Dirty Girls like Dirty Boys"

Cat

 

[TheeGoatPig]

My brother slapped a sticker on the back of our father's car without his knowlege.

I saw the Sausage!
Big Boss Sausage and the Missing Links

My father thought it was so funny that when he bought a new car a few years later he begged for another bumper sticker