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It's because you don't post nudie pictures or say you want to have hot, sweaty, monkey lovin' with well hung dudes or shaved and slutty chicks. :p
 
Modern Mephisto said:
It's because you don't post nudie pictures or say you want to have hot, sweaty, monkey lovin' with well hung dudes or shaved and slutty chicks. :p
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i did that and neither worked for me ... girl don't worry no one likes me either .. btw take a guess who this is lol
 
Okay, posting pictures and saying you're looking for fun will get your foot in the door. You'll probably get a rush of PMs early on and the occasional ones from latecomers. But if you're just all talk, of course people are going to lose interest. I mean, look where you're at. It's Literotica. It's all about the possibility of getting laid. If you can't help a guy out, you got nothing to offer. :p
 
Modern Mephisto said:
Okay, posting pictures and saying you're looking for fun will get your foot in the door. You'll probably get a rush of PMs early on and the occasional ones from latecomers. But if you're just all talk, of course people are going to lose interest. I mean, look where you're at. It's Literotica. It's all about the possibility of getting laid. If you can't help a guy out, you got nothing to offer. :p
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Damn i really do leave a bad taste in your mouth these days . Sorry.
 
notwantuexpect said:
Damn i really do leave a bad taste in your mouth these days . Sorry.
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I was just telling it like it is. This is Literotica. You really think the vast majority of guys come here to chit-chat? Do you honestly think they came here to discuss books, music, movies, or talk about daily life, the weather? You think they're looking for friends? Fuck no. This place is really little more than a free porn site. So, unless you're putting up hardcore pictures or wanting to cybersex, then you don't have anything to offer. Especially when there are dozens upon dozens of other women (and men pretending to be women) who will give them what they need. If they can't date you, fuck you, or jerk off to your pictures or phone calls, they won't waste their time.

It's sad but true that you're simply not special here - or most other places, for that matter - unless you can offer someone something that nobody else can. That goes for men and women alike. If you don't stand out, if you don't shine as someone that's truly interesting and unique, then you're just another face in the crowd. At best, you'll get someone's half-assed attention. They'll message you or talk to you when it's convenient for them or when they're bored or when they want something. At worst, they won't even bother with you because their time is far too precious to be wasted on someone who isn't special.

On top of which, this is all online. And online interactions, online relationships, have all the depth of a kiddie pool. It's not about making deep, meaninful connections. It's about killing time, indulging a distraction. You're only worth chatting with as long as you're entertaining. And you're only entertaining so long as nothing better comes along. That's it.

I'd estimate no more than 5% - and that's being generous - of the people on here have any interest in forming genuine, meaningful connections with others. So, if that's what you're searching for, you're looking in the wrong place.
 
Wow dude, you seem a little grumpy. Fact is, I'm here to talk to people and not get involved in sex stuff. I do post about it, but I don't offer it. Thing is I have contacted about 4-5 woman just to talk, and they turn out to be complete bitches. They get all bitchy when they don't know who you are. It's sad they wont even talk to me, because they think all I want is sex. Can't someone just fuckin talk anymore.

I talked to you Canadiancutie, and your still on my MSN list if you wish to talk. But your MSN seems always to be away, so I never message you. I don't like using the PM thing because well, I forget to look at it sometimes, so I am sure others do as well. Plus I would rather have a convo, then a message back and forth that spands a few days.

Ravin
 
Nah. I'm not grumpy. Harsh? Sure. Brutally honest? You bet your ass. Hostile? Maybe a little. Bitter as fuck? Absolutely. But not grumpy. :D

As I said, I'm just telling it like it is. There are very few people here who are actually interested in any sort of meaningful connection, whether it's romantic or purely platonic. I just believe the vast majority are here for the free pictures, the cybersex, and the possibility of hooking up for sex. Not everyone, but most.

I don't count myself among them. I mean, I'm not a hypocrite. I'm not going to say I haven't enjoyed my fair share of oogling pictures and making sexual advances on some of the women. Because I have. I still browse the pictures now and again. And I'm not opposed to a little playful flirtation or sexual chat. Hell, that's really all there is here. If I wasn't interested, I probably wouldn't be at this site. But I accept it for what it is.

At the same time, I'm in that 5% that actually has an interest in finding intelligent, engaging women to talk with and possibly have it lead to more. Though, I'm looking for that in real life, not necessarily on Lit. I mean, I honestly wouldn't expect to find amazingly deep, meaningful friendships here, let alone the girl of my dreams. Not to say there aren't some amazing women to be found on Lit, because there are. And I've had the pleasure of getting to know a few of them. Sadly, however, most of the best women, the ones that are not only truly interesting, as well as sexy in mind and body, but also responsive to getting to know you as a person, are all married or likewise spoken for. And online friendships are fine, but they really aren't all that satisfying or meaningful. You can't go out for coffee with someone online. When you're depressed or frustrated, you can't go for a drinking and ranting session with an online buddy. Online friends can't hug you when you need it. They can't give you the sort of hands-on attention that real life friends can. So, it's sort of a hollow relationship. That's all I'm saying.
 
Oh man, I know what your saying all to well. How I wish some of my online friends were with me. I still believe the perfect girl is someone I know online. But alas, until we meet, it will never be. I like the brutally honest thing as well. I'm like that in real life. Gets in me some major trouble with friends, but thats how life is.

Ravin
 
"Beauty is truth, truth beauty."

Heh. Yeah, nobody likes the truth. Or rather, everyone wants the truth, they just don't like the reality of it. Of course, adding the "brutal" part is just my own sadistic twist. No point in mincing words, right?

And not being able to actually meet is really the biggest problem with meeting women online, with online romantic relationships in general. It's that whole quandry of not knowing... No matter how well you get along with someone online, there's no chance for something "real" or something more substantial if you don't have the same chemistry in "the real world."

That's why it's hard to put any stock in online encounters. If you click with someone, you either need to live near each other or have the time and resources to make a trip and find out if there's something really there. Otherwise...the long you have a common interest but are apart, the greater the expectations are going to be for when you do meet. And that's entirely too much pressure to put on a relationship that hasn't even really begun.
 
You know I have spoken to a few people from this site and thought I really got along with them , but somehow i always said something to piss them off. They would discuss meeting and well in most cases it was almost impossible .Yes i would meet someone off of here ,but seriously not all guys intentions are just wanting to be friends or have a relationship, they want to rip your clothes off and get you in bed as soon as you can. Because i showed pictures and flirt (which is me irl and on here ) I was called a tease .So to sum it up I am sure some people probably have turned to me when they were bored and so be it . If i can make someone's night better then i would. It does suck only knowing someone on an intimate level online , but I would take that anyday over never have known that person and not having them in my life in some sort of fashion and honestly if something trully developed like they say ...if there is a will there is a way . I would find a way to see if that connection was worth exploring more in depth.
 
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Right on

I think you summed it up pretty well
Bamagirl00. It would be my guess that very, very, very few meet off-line. There are some that I have "talked" with in cyber world that I would like to meet in person, and have a "real" relationship with, but this is mostly a forum for living out ones fantasy with someone that they will never meet. Think about it next time you walk down a street and pass someone - they may be someone that you are having sex with on-line.
 
just to clarify . I very rarely talk dirty outside of this forum. I do discuss what I am looking for in a man , sexual fantasies and desires with those I know outside of it , but it rarely goes beyond that.
 
Modern Mephisto said:
Heh. Yeah, nobody likes the truth. Or rather, everyone wants the truth, they just don't like the reality of it. Of course, adding the "brutal" part is just my own sadistic twist. No point in mincing words, right?

And not being able to actually meet is really the biggest problem with meeting women online, with online romantic relationships in general. It's that whole quandry of not knowing... No matter how well you get along with someone online, there's no chance for something "real" or something more substantial if you don't have the same chemistry in "the real world."

That's why it's hard to put any stock in online encounters. If you click with someone, you either need to live near each other or have the time and resources to make a trip and find out if there's something really there. Otherwise...the long you have a common interest but are apart, the greater the expectations are going to be for when you do meet. And that's entirely too much pressure to put on a relationship that hasn't even really begun.
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Truth is in perception, it can be what you want it to be......so is it beautiful? That is entirely up to you. Just remember the law of attraction...what you focus on is what you bring to yourself.
For you online experiences are doomed to failure, for others they represent hope, a connection when real life falters...... is it wrong, I don't know. I think it is up to the individual. I know many of my close experiences online have been ephemeral at best and out of those have come a few good friendships. I do not regret having had those relationships, just their passing.:)
 
I think it's far more rewarding to get a PM saying 'you sound interesting/intelligent' rather than getting one that says 'you're so HOTT'. It's nice if you log into literotica and a little box pops up saying you have a message. I don't get too many; a couple a day (I don't think that's a lot.. is it??).

I have a little thing about meeting guys in real life. I want them to see me at my worst; give a bad physical impression. I don't wear make-up anyway and sometimes I have a temptation to wear unflattering clothes just for the sake of it. I think that if a guy still likes you then, a) they'll not be disappointed later b) they like you for more than your looks. Translated to literotica it would be not posting pictures of your pussy and simply behaving in an interesting way. If you catch people's attention this way, they're more likely to be more interesting people (in the 5% Mephisto spoke of) and you're more likely to have a proper correspondance rather than sexual chit-chat that you could have with anybody.
 
I'm impressed that this is actually an issue.

If I weren't getting what I wanted out of something, I'd either change it (if were something changeable) or abandon it (if it were something that could be left). I'm not one to whine.

Oh well...
 
canadiancutie said:
no one ever sends me messages anymore. people suck. lol
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I think that you intimidate quite a few people. If they check out your home page it says 17 and they leave (I checked it against your birthday and it says 18). You have a cute face, slightly goth looking and come across as intelligent. Give it time and just pick a theme. I've seen vegan discussions, recipies, etc. Just have fun a try to relax around here.:rose:

:D
 
I rarely browse through the personals anymore, but every now and then i'll peek back in as it was the first area of Lit I started out on. If you are actually looking to find people that are into discussions and friendships rather than just trying to meet for a quick fuck, you need to go to other parts of the forums such as the playground or how-to boards. I have made a number of close friends, and have even met a few from here, but I did not first make their aquaintance in the personals area.

I met them by posting on other threads in the playground and on How-to, joining in discussions, asking questions and answering them. In short, proving that I was not a shallow guy just looking for a quick lay, but an intelligent multi-faceted person worth getting to know.

In short, head to other parts of the forums, post on topics of interest to you, let people get to know you, and who knows what may transpire. Good luck!

(oh, and be forewarned, the GB (general board) tends to be clique-ish, and very unfriendly towards most new posters. However, the people on the playground, the How-to boards, (if your kink leans towards BDSM) the BDSM talk and BDSM Cafe boards are more welcoming to new people. All will be happy to hear fresh voices in the discussions.)
 
CC, it is not that you do ot show ceretain parts in a certaqin way much as we'd all love that. it could be that this is a sexual website and that the topic has to be erotically charged. you posts about pics of the underaged intrigued some but it was specifically an attempt to see what others kinks were and not sharing of yourself. I think you are adorable from the one pic I saw and you seem smart, and have a sense of humor and intelligence. What I have not heard, although I have not followed your every post, is what makes you tic. Sometimes just responding to another's picture or post suggests a lot about ourselves. the more you share the more you will receive.

Marsipanne, I am not a believer in putting one's most unattractive foot first. While I understand your point very well, you might consider that to the other person, your actions might suggest a lack of interest or even sexual respect. Men like to protect their image to women they first meet and might view a woman's baring of her worst or less attractive points as an attempt to put them off or as a sign that they do not care so much. Would you react well to someone showing up like they did not care much about the meeting?
 
Actually, I rather agree with Marsipanne on starting things off on the worse level. Well, maybe not the worse level... I mean, I wouldn't make a date with someone and show up all disheveled, unshaven and unshowered, wearing a stained T-shirt and sweatpants or anything like that. But neither would I go out of my way to make a good impression, attempt to hide all my faults and flaws, etc. That's really just another form of dishonesty, in my opinion. Like someone who consciously hides the fact that they smoke for the first few dates. As if to say, "I just want them to like me first. Then I'll let them know I have all these disgusting habits."

If a woman doesn't tend to wear makeup regularly, she shouldn't do it to make a good first impression. If she typically wears jeans and a T-shirt with tennis shoes, she shouldn't doll herself up in a dress and heels. If she swears like a drunken Irish sailor in a whorehouse, she should just do it rather than put on an act of ladylike purity. Same for a guy. If he adjusts his balls in public, he might as well do it while on a date. If he's got no sense of style, he might as well show up in his standard ensemble rather than have a friend help him pick out what might be a pleasing wardrobe. If he's a heavy drinker, he should just go ahead and throw them back and let the woman decide whether or not she finds a loud, slurring idiot charming. Let's face it, all that stuff is going to come out sooner or later and the other person will either accept you for who you are or want to run like hell. Why attempt to prolong the inevitable? It's really a colossal waste of time.

I think it makes a lot more sense to let someone see you at your worst and decide whether it's something they can live with than make a false impression that's quickly discarded once you have the person "hooked." Because you're going to come to expect that high standard the presented early on all the time and be grossly disappointed when the other person fails to live up to it. You should fall in love with the person they are, not the person they pretended to be in order to win your approval.
 
I think it makes a lot more sense to let someone see you at your worst and decide whether it's something they can live with than make a false impression that's quickly discarded once you have the person "hooked." Because you're going to come to expect that high standard the presented early on all the time and be grossly disappointed when the other person fails to live up to it. You should fall in love with the person they are, not the person they pretended to be in order to win your approval.
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Totally agree. The problem is, people often have a 'mask' they wear in society anyway and they carry this superficial self around so much they don't know who they really are. In the end they are just clones of the most influential person around them.

You know, when I tell girls around me my 'theory' about dating and such, they think I'm crazy.
 
like minds brought together by me - no charge

hmmm...me thinks that Mephisto and Marsipanne should meet. I disagree with the two of you but let that be your bond :)

I agree that you should not be phony or an outright liar but I do think you should try to be your most atractive true self and continue to trty to look good for your sig other. That said, I ain't no movie star.
 
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