mild humiliation/control ideas

I do not have a humiliation fetish. Nor am I a person who gets off on controlling people sexually. I am currently dating a man who is into both mild humiliation and being with women who control him. He knows I am not a huge fan of either but I know he enjoys it. So I am looking to sorta broaden my horizens a bit, take one for the team sorta speak and am open to a few ideas that may give me a little taste and see what I can do with this. I want nothing more then to make him happy and he isn't expecting anything so that would make it that much more fun.

http://www.akashaweb.com/goodgirl.html

Also look in the library (at the top of this forum page).

boston_bbw said:

I do not have a humiliation fetish. Nor am I a person who gets off on controlling people sexually. I am currently dating a man who is into both mild humiliation and being with women who control him. He knows I am not a huge fan of either but I know he enjoys it. So I am looking to sorta broaden my horizens a bit, take one for the team sorta speak and am open to a few ideas that may give me a little taste and see what I can do with this. I want nothing more then to make him happy and he isn't expecting anything so that would make it that much more fun.

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Hello and welcome bbbw.

Here is a link from our Library which relates specifically to humiliation. i am sure you may find a few ideas in the discussions we've had regarding humiliation experiences.

Good luck to you.

Humiliation Link


lara

How mild?

I find humiliation is one thing you can incorporate into any kind of "dirty talk" routine you may have, and it can sometimes remain safely and hotly there and never have to go and buy panties.

It's a good start anyway.

My advice is to find some way to link his needs to your pleasure. Otherwise, you will be caught simply doing things to please him. There is nothing wrong with that, but I think it runs a strong risk of getting old really quickly.

One thing you can do is to work on extending the length of time you are making love. This can be as simple as having him move slower than he would otherwise. Tell him that the closer he gets to orgasm, the slower he has to move. When he gets so close that he has to stop, have him kiss your breasts, belly, or whatever you really enjoy until he has his body under control again.

I'm not sure about the humilation angle, what some consider humiliating, others don't. Some may consider what I said above to be humiliating. It may be something as simple as making him admit that he enjoys your control. You could even work out a system where he has to say "You're the boss," even when others are around. Since only the two of you know what it really means, it's still safe but he will respond to it.

Control works well with masturbation and/or oral. Have him lay on his back and let him tell you his fantasies while you stimulate him. In my experience, you get a lot more honesty and detail from a person when you are holding them on the edge of orgasm than when you are sitting on the sofa having coffee.

I think some women are afraid to take control because of the fear they will become shrewish. You can avoid this by simply giving him a directive like: This weekend you are to see to all of my desires without me having to tell you what they are. Be prepared for a little confusion on his part, but also be prepared for him to sweep you off your feet. It works best if you give him a few days to plan things.

Hope things go really well for both of you.


Hugs,





Kat