Fantasies-only
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 10, 2006
- Posts
- 237
Improvementent suggestions (and request)
Title, link, and author: Colonization Ch. 01 by homealone_447
I'm not a writer, but I wanted to give you props for the subject matter (alien controlling women's minds to make everyone sex slaves).
I really didn't read it yet, but if I made it in a softcore erotica instead of hentai based porn, I would have had the same idea.
Echcci characters:
Catgirls - Masturbatory half cats that are too much sexually (sci/fi horror storyline) for men (humanoid daughters are non furries).
Non furry catgirls or "non furries" (no fur, no tail, human teeth, traditionally always topless).
Mermaids - Sexy, slutty beautiful women with a sleek fishtail (topless in water, fully naked on land, and sex slaves to catgirls in heat).
Fairies - Pretty or cute topless winged mini women living in artificial forest on the ship (help sprites in garden when needed).
Sprites - Prepubescent (can't change the myth, sorry, but we can just say "young") topless girls who are one third the size of fairies (like daydreaming on erect penis).
Winged horses - Beautiful sultry winged women (one is princess) who transform into horses (will communicate by using mental telepathy).
Male alien - Has the powers of remote and mass mind control, body manipulation (includes creating multiple erect penises simultaneously, while holding back ejaculation for almost 4 hours), mental pleasure enhancement, levitation for upskirt camera shots, cloak of invisibility, X-ray vision, and my favorite, can project sexual sensation onto the rest of Earth's population (all minors kidnapped and put in suspended animation aboard space craft).
Female alien - Allows mate's sexual conquests, for she swings as well on her home planet (can read minds and influence decision making).
The Tease
Before anything happens, the anticipation of it can really get one off, for instance, Lil' Kim at the Grammies (or Oscars, I forgot), showed her breast with the nipple covered, but Pamela Anderson had on a low cut blouse with a plunging neckline, which reveled plenty of nipple slips at the right angle.
Now which appearance do you think would be more arousing?
Stripping
I don't think the characters should start out nude or even partially nude.
Removing clothing is also fun, and the more layers you have to remove, the more arousing it can be.
Erotic Speed and Movements
Slow and mythotical would be nice, for instance a woman unbuttoning her blouse one button at a time set to soft, slow music, slowly moving forward to the man, and quickly jerking away, but not as if she is running, just walking fast.
Tentacles
You have a nice hentai theme going here.
This is ok, but it's not my taste.
That doesn't mean it's not a good addition to the story.
Usually with tentacles, it's not consensual, thereby having a rape fetish.
If you chose to go with a more American influence, it could be a regular creature's limbs resting on and gently stroking genitals, although with a Japanese based story, a tentacle (representing a penis) could be reaching for penetration, which includes multiple orifices (entry points).
If you would like to help me with the first chapter (starting with catgirls at the city of Atlantas), I would really appreciate it.
Title, link, and author: Colonization Ch. 01 by homealone_447
I'm not a writer, but I wanted to give you props for the subject matter (alien controlling women's minds to make everyone sex slaves).
I really didn't read it yet, but if I made it in a softcore erotica instead of hentai based porn, I would have had the same idea.
Echcci characters:
Catgirls - Masturbatory half cats that are too much sexually (sci/fi horror storyline) for men (humanoid daughters are non furries).
Non furry catgirls or "non furries" (no fur, no tail, human teeth, traditionally always topless).
Mermaids - Sexy, slutty beautiful women with a sleek fishtail (topless in water, fully naked on land, and sex slaves to catgirls in heat).
Fairies - Pretty or cute topless winged mini women living in artificial forest on the ship (help sprites in garden when needed).
Sprites - Prepubescent (can't change the myth, sorry, but we can just say "young") topless girls who are one third the size of fairies (like daydreaming on erect penis).
Winged horses - Beautiful sultry winged women (one is princess) who transform into horses (will communicate by using mental telepathy).
Male alien - Has the powers of remote and mass mind control, body manipulation (includes creating multiple erect penises simultaneously, while holding back ejaculation for almost 4 hours), mental pleasure enhancement, levitation for upskirt camera shots, cloak of invisibility, X-ray vision, and my favorite, can project sexual sensation onto the rest of Earth's population (all minors kidnapped and put in suspended animation aboard space craft).
Female alien - Allows mate's sexual conquests, for she swings as well on her home planet (can read minds and influence decision making).
The Tease
Before anything happens, the anticipation of it can really get one off, for instance, Lil' Kim at the Grammies (or Oscars, I forgot), showed her breast with the nipple covered, but Pamela Anderson had on a low cut blouse with a plunging neckline, which reveled plenty of nipple slips at the right angle.
Now which appearance do you think would be more arousing?
Stripping
I don't think the characters should start out nude or even partially nude.
Removing clothing is also fun, and the more layers you have to remove, the more arousing it can be.
Erotic Speed and Movements
Slow and mythotical would be nice, for instance a woman unbuttoning her blouse one button at a time set to soft, slow music, slowly moving forward to the man, and quickly jerking away, but not as if she is running, just walking fast.
Tentacles
You have a nice hentai theme going here.
This is ok, but it's not my taste.
That doesn't mean it's not a good addition to the story.
Usually with tentacles, it's not consensual, thereby having a rape fetish.
If you chose to go with a more American influence, it could be a regular creature's limbs resting on and gently stroking genitals, although with a Japanese based story, a tentacle (representing a penis) could be reaching for penetration, which includes multiple orifices (entry points).
If you would like to help me with the first chapter (starting with catgirls at the city of Atlantas), I would really appreciate it.
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