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how did you become known on the boards?

L

lil_elmo

Experienced
Joined
Aug 2, 2005
Posts
31
Hi All (insert nervous smiley here)

How have other newbies gotten over the feeling of not having anything worthwhile to say and post on the forums. I am looking for ideas of what people did to make themselves known.

To explain a bit. I feel intimidated, everyone else, to me at least, seems so knowledgable. I realize that the simplest answer would be just do it, yet, the thought scares me. I am not saying that the members on this board have made me feel this way.

I so want to stop lurking and post but something stops me, the feeling of being taunted, made fun of etc. I realize this is a self esteem issue and actually am working on it.

I did do one thing yesterday and posted on the "recipe thread". I LOVE cooking so that one did not seem to throw me into the midst of a panic attack.


lil elmo
 
There are a few game threads as well...The Reply only with a question thread...BDSM word association and such that don't require anything but short playful posts. Perhaps those would be good ice breakers for you to help get you used to posting.

Or you could always just linger and lurk until you find a thread that says something you feel passionate about and just let loose.
 
it took me a long time to stop lurking, too... i made about 3,000 posts on the story ideas forum until i actually felt comfortable enough with myself to think i wasn't a noob anymore ;) but really it's just about your mental state. maybe some day you'll just feel chatty and start responding to all sorts of random things and then POOF you'll be an old-timer.
 
lil_elmo said:
Hi All (insert nervous smiley here)

How have other newbies gotten over the feeling of not having anything worthwhile to say and post on the forums. I am looking for ideas of what people did to make themselves known.

To explain a bit. I feel intimidated, everyone else, to me at least, seems so knowledgable. I realize that the simplest answer would be just do it, yet, the thought scares me. I am not saying that the members on this board have made me feel this way.

I so want to stop lurking and post but something stops me, the feeling of being taunted, made fun of etc. I realize this is a self esteem issue and actually am working on it.

I did do one thing yesterday and posted on the "recipe thread". I LOVE cooking so that one did not seem to throw me into the midst of a panic attack.


lil elmo
Click to expand...
It's simple. Jump in and post. Contribute whatever you feel is worth contributing, and judge that by your own worth of opinion rather than allow yourself to focus upon, or worry yourself so much about what others may think.

Many times, even when the majority may not find themselves able to relate, there is always someone out there who will draw something positive from your experiences, thoughts, feelings and opinions. You can't please everyone and would be a fool to try to.

Just be yourself. Relax. And if anyone else can't accept it, (and you for exactly who you are) .... tell them politely to kiss your newbie ass. ;)
 
I'm still a newb. ;)

I get the same nervous paranoia about posting when I have nothing useful to contribute, and feeling like everyone knows everyone else except for me. But nobody's going to get to know me if I don't post! :)

So I poked around, and made a comment here and there on topics that I either knew something about, or wanted to know more about, or even just commented that whatever the topic was sounded interesting, and eventually felt a little less outside-ish.

It just takes a while. I'm a bit of a forum-addict, I visit a couple different ones, so I'm sort of used to it by now. :cattail:
 
Hey... I'm still new. I think you just have to jump on in. The water's fine. Besides no one here bites except in self defense, or if its SSC or, maybe, if they mistook you for a cookie. But that won't happen!
 
Just do it - just jump into it.
That's what I did - and it gets easier with every post.
it takes forever to lose your virginity - then, before you know it you're a guru.
 
brioche said:
Just do it - .....................- then, before you know it you're a guru.
Click to expand...
Do it enough, and before you know it, *you'll* be the one who'll ultimately define who you are ....


;)
Personally, i just wish more people would say, "To all hell, screw it.", and just put their inhabitions aside. Regardless of how many appear as being online, sometimes the boards can get a bit slow. The more posting and the more often, all the better, i say.

More, people here, than not, are friendly and welcoming. And, there are plenty of threads where you can just post 'whatever is on your mind' without judgements from others being warranted (if judgement should ever be, at all). There's the Bitch Thread, Random Blurt Thread, etc ect, so there's really no reason for so many to hide in lurk mode ....
 
Last edited:
I'm an internet superstar! I don't need to be known on these boards!



please pay attention to me!!!!
 
Xelebes said:
I'm an internet superstar! I don't need to be known on these boards!



please pay attention to me!!!!
Click to expand...
Whore you? Do we even know you???









:p






.
 
lil_elmo said:
Hi All (insert nervous smiley here)
Click to expand...

Hi All :eek:

lil_elmo said:
How have other newbies gotten over the feeling of not having anything worthwhile to say and post on the forums. I am looking for ideas of what people did to make themselves known.
Click to expand...

If I'm not mistaken, I believe I began by convincing everyone I was a rapist and a troll. Once that shock value died off I started posting pictures.

lil_elmo said:
To explain a bit. I feel intimidated, everyone else, to me at least, seems so knowledgable.
Click to expand...

Fear not, the vast majority of us are faking, and more than a few openly admit to having no fucking idea what they're talking about. If it doesn't stop them, it shouldn't stop you!

lil_elmo said:
I so want to stop lurking and post but something stops me, the feeling of being taunted, made fun of etc. I realize this is a self esteem issue and actually am working on it.
Click to expand...

Don't worry. Any taunting would go on in the hidden world of PMs where you wouldn't be able to see it.

Happy posting!

(just be yourself. you're not that corny, I promise)
 
I have no idea 'how I became known'. I lurked for a bit, then started posting. Since I have an opinion about everything, and no problem sharing my opinion, I had lotsa things to post about. :D
 
Marquis has said it well. Though it may seem a lot of people know what they are talking about and you have nothing to offer, you might be surprised to find that some have nothing but fantasy to refer to, while others are actively pursuing the opportunity to learn more hands on, and others are actually doing it. All have something to offer simply because we all have thoughts, ideas, and fantasies which revolve around a common theme in some way. Through posting you gain a lot of that knowledge you are feeling you lack, by interacting and discussing things with others who share your interests.

For us it was a matter of reading the posts for a short time until we felt we wanted to take part in a particular discussion, and then keep working at it. There have been times I have wanted to withdraw due to comments or attitudes which arise, and F actually has done so on more than one occasion and rarely visits here anymore. Good thing to remember in those moments is just as you do not like everyone on this planet, nor is everyone going to like you or what you have to say....and that is OK because we are all individuals with a right to an opinion, and different needs and tastes. Just post away and remember this place is for everyone to have fun and also learn if that is their want, no-one is better than the rest. :D

Catalina :rose:
 
I'm still a newbie. *looks at post count* Well, maybe not...
I suppose I'm 'known' around here by now. But the beginning sure was sort of slow. But that's pretty normal. If you are new in a group (work/school/sports/whatever) you are not known. If you stop going, or don't talk with anybody when there, you stay new and unknown.
Yes, it does seem intimidating how everyone knows each other, joke around and stuff. Doesn't really matter if it's online or RL.
I remember when I first came here I was awed by all those 'literotica gurus', even more by those with a custom made title. I just wanted to get an AV. Which took me forever to get.
And then, in the blink of an eye, I have my own custom title and give advice to newer newbies.
 
Welcome lil_elmo :)

I'm not known either, but I am much more comfortable posting on this forum and I post on a few Playground threads. You just got to jump in and post what you want. Soon you will find a nitch for yourself and some friends that will make Lit feel more personal and not so big.

Come over to the Question game on this forum. It's fun and we have cookies. Well we have cookies if Graceanne is busy. We will hide some for you. ;)
 
His_pita said:
It's fun and we have cookies. Well we have cookies if Graceanne is busy. We will hide some for you. ;)
Click to expand...
Psst. There's at least a dozen on the bottom of that chocolate filled hot tub in there. ;)

tosses pita some scoober diving gear ... stands as lookout for Graceanne, while looking all innocent and stuff ..
 
I joined Lit just over 3 years ago. I was newly out of a long marriage and wanted to learn and explore my sexuality. I first started posting on the How To forum, then someone directed me to a thread for Aussies in the Playground. That someone was Gil_T2 - the man I moved to live with nearly 2 years ago and who is my beloved Master :D

I was very shy at first about posting, but just began replying to a few posts and soon made some friends. When Master Gil and I started getting serious, I came to the BDSM boards. He was an experienced Master and I was a total newbie but I knew that I loved Him and wanted to please Him. Again I was hesitant about posting - everyone else seemed so knowledgeable and I didn't know a thing :confused: But after lurking and reading for a few weeks I put a few posts in......then when I had a little more r/t experience I became more confident and now I just post where I feel like it :D
 
:) Thank you all for the responses

As for the cookies, I have been lurking long enuf to know if there are cookies to be had that I need to get them before Graceanne. :p

In fact, I have all ready gotten into my Chiristmas baking, yummmm shortbread cookies. And they are all mine as Hubby is at work. :D

The only downside to all of this yummy baking is that we have decided after Christmas I am going on a diet (yuck). I tried to convince him that it was useless that I try to lose the extra weight but he does not believe me. Guess that is what I get for exploring the Dom/sub lifestyle with him. The upside would be that after I lose the fat, he said I get a whole new wardrobe. Ladies can you imagine getting to shop for clothes and not having to pay for it-------Yahooo

I have made a personal challenge to post at least once a day on a thread. That way I should not revert back to lurking, at least I hope so.

lil elmo
 
lil_elmo said:
The only downside to all of this yummy baking is that we have decided after Christmas I am going on a diet (yuck). I tried to convince him that it was useless that I try to lose the extra weight but he does not believe me. Guess that is what I get for exploring the Dom/sub lifestyle with him. The upside would be that after I lose the fat, he said I get a whole new wardrobe. Ladies can you imagine getting to shop for clothes and not having to pay for it-------Yahooo
Click to expand...


Yes! I can imagine it very well. My Sir mailed out three boxes yesterday and more will come from online stores for our trip away. I have lost 47 lbs so far with his support and incentives. He wants to dress me and picked out everything I will wear on our 8 day trip away. Then he says we will go shopping for more once we are settled. I am one lucky girl! :)
 
His_pita said:
Yes! I can imagine it very well. My Sir mailed out three boxes yesterday and more will come from online stores for our trip away. I have lost 47 lbs so far with his support and incentives. He wants to dress me and picked out everything I will wear on our 8 day trip away. Then he says we will go shopping for more once we are settled. I am one lucky girl! :)
Click to expand...
That's very kewl pita. :) i know how it is, i love it when my Master shops for me.

So .... what did he get for you?? Have pics or URLs? Where are you going on that trip?
 
His_pita said:
Welcome lil_elmo :)

I'm not known either, but I am much more comfortable posting on this forum and I post on a few Playground threads. You just got to jump in and post what you want. Soon you will find a nitch for yourself and some friends that will make Lit feel more personal and not so big.

Come over to the Question game on this forum. It's fun and we have cookies. Well we have cookies if Graceanne is busy. We will hide some for you. ;)
Click to expand...

YOU'RE HIDING COOKIES? :mad:

I WILL FIND THEM, I WILL! muhahaha
 
sinn0cent1 said:
Psst. There's at least a dozen on the bottom of that chocolate filled hot tub in there. ;)

tosses pita some scoober diving gear ... stands as lookout for Graceanne, while looking all innocent and stuff ..
Click to expand...

tickles sinn.

:p
 
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