Did I just see you at the store?

Were you there? Was that you?

If it was you, and you did see me, you witnessed me at my near possible worst.

You saw a harried woman, unbrushed hair pulled up high in a huge clip and tousled bangs all over her face. No makeup.

This woman was wearing one of her husband's denim shirts. The shirt fell halfway to her knees (which is probably a good thing because it almost completely covered the used-to-be-white shorts she was wearing).

Those used-to-be-white shorts were covered with a cacophony of stains: grass from gardening, pink nail polish from assisting with daughter's manicure, a big splotch of spaghetti sauce from last night's dinner exploding and a miniscule drop of ink from the Lexmark printer. We're working on the Science Fair project.

So, were you there?

Were you one of the gentlemen who graciously stepped aside as I tore around the aisles in a shopping frenzy?

Were you the check-out gal (ex-student) who managed to recognize me despite my dishevelment?

Perhaps you were the kind man in the parking lot who came to my assistance after I managed to slam my heel in the back part of the shopping cart. He helped me unload my packages and didn't even bat an eye when he noticed my legs and feet. The dichotomy of grass stains on my knees against flirty sandals and a whore-of-babylon-red pedicure must have boggled his mind.

But he was still most polite.


And now I'm home. Safe. Hiding.


So - was it you?


Did you see me?


God, I hope not.

So it was you who got me all hard at the store? Damn lady you have to watch it when you go out like that. It's dangerouse to have me driving around hard as a rock like that, it could have blocked the steering wheel making me get into an accident.

Cat

You got it wrong. I wish I'd been there. You sound absolutely delectable. It's women like you I want to follow .... If you'd rather not be wanted, don't be so friggin interesting.

Yep, that was me.

But All I could think was, "What an incredibly beautiful woman. I wish she would slow down for a minute."

Oh, my.

Thank you, gentlemen.

Dishevelled women are at their best.

Now me on the other hand, with bleary eyes, greasy hair, my glasses on, a pseudo-beard marring my jawline, dressed in an ancient jumper and some cargos, with a brilliant red cut from rugby down one side of my face...

The Earl

TheEarl said:

Dishevelled women are at their best.

Now me on the other hand, with bleary eyes, greasy hair, my glasses on, a pseudo-beard marring my jawline, dressed in an ancient jumper and some cargos, with a brilliant red cut from rugby down one side of my face...

The Earl

Click to expand...

what's not to like

I saw you but you didn't see me. I was coming over to say hello when my heel broke, causing me to fall into the path of your recklessly drivin shoppin cart. I don't think you even noticed when you crashed it into my head, but I did get a glimpse of your babylon whore toenails when your foot kissed my face. When I came to I raced out to try to catch you in the parkin lot, but forgot I still had that bag of cheetos in my hand, that ex-student check-out girl musta been on the girls footbal team, she tackles hard. I made bail for shopliftin, got a few stitches at the hospital, and came home to see this thread.

No, you didn't see me at the store.

You're welcome.

I did notice all those things, but I figured you had enough problems without some ancient horn-dog chasing after you.

Lisa Denton said:

I saw you but you didn't see me. I was coming over to say hello when my heel broke, causing me to fall into the path of your recklessly drivin shoppin cart. I don't think you even noticed when you crashed it into my head, but I did get a glimpse of your babylon whore toenails when your foot kissed my face. When I came to I raced out to try to catch you in the parkin lot, but forgot I still had that bag of cheetos in my hand, that ex-student check-out girl musta been on the girls footbal team, she tackles hard. I made bail for shopliftin, got a few stitches at the hospital, and came home to see this thread.

No, you didn't see me at the store.

Click to expand...

I saw you, too. But when i tried to help you up you hit me with a bottle of ketchup. I just backed away and tried to avoid any further violence.

TheEarl said:

Dishevelled women are at their best.

Now me on the other hand, with bleary eyes, greasy hair, my glasses on, a pseudo-beard marring my jawline, dressed in an ancient jumper and some cargos, with a brilliant red cut from rugby down one side of my face...

The Earl

Click to expand...

Yum.

Do rugby players really eat their dead? Or are you free to peruse other offerings?

rgraham666 said:

You're welcome.

I did notice all those things, but I figured you had enough problems without some ancient horn-dog chasing after you.

Click to expand...

Yeah, I was behind you when you bought the box of assorted butt plugs and giant economy size Astroglide.

i was getting the small strap-on


Anonymous

Lisa Denton said:

I saw you but you didn't see me. I was coming over to say hello when my heel broke, causing me to fall into the path of your recklessly drivin shoppin cart. I don't think you even noticed when you crashed it into my head, but I did get a glimpse of your babylon whore toenails when your foot kissed my face. When I came to I raced out to try to catch you in the parkin lot, but forgot I still had that bag of cheetos in my hand, that ex-student check-out girl musta been on the girls footbal team, she tackles hard. I made bail for shopliftin, got a few stitches at the hospital, and came home to see this thread.

No, you didn't see me at the store.

Click to expand...

Pity.

http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/zensiert/sm003.gif

Edward Teach said:

Yeah, I was behind you when you bought the box of assorted butt plugs and giant economy size Astroglide.

I was getting the small strap-on


Anonymous

Click to expand...

Small?

Ah, Teach - you disappoint me.

Tch. Didn't anyone get the memo? Humans are only permitted to express sexual interest in females under the age of 20, preferably with surgical modifications to assist them in appearing more like Barbie dolls. I submit the proof:

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=334194

Now, please do step aside and leave the field uncontested - as the rules clearly do not apply to equines.

SSS, pray do let me know if I can assist in absolutely any way. I am a compelte pushover for little painted toes in sandals.

sweetsubsarahh said:

Yum.

Do rugby players really eat their dead? Or are you free to peruse other offerings?

Click to expand...

Anything in particular you would like me to apply my lips to?

The Earl

BlackShanglan said:

SSS, pray do let me know if I can assist in absolutely any way. I am a compelte pushover for little painted toes in sandals.

Click to expand...

TheEarl said:

Anything in particular you would like me to apply my lips to?

The Earl

Click to expand...

Ummm, wow.

Now I'm all of a sudden speechless.

I'm sure anyplace you choose would be incredible, Earl.

Had I have been there...

Would have dawned my coat of armor, mounted my white steed...and come to your rescue. We don;t get to do that much these days. Women's Lib and all.

Too bad too. I like helping out a lady. And you....are one.

(Even if you are a naughty one sometimes)