The lowest point of my life.

I think I've reached the lowest point of my life right now. To understand where I'm at I've got to tell you a story a true story.

Almost two years ago my wife decided to leave me and gave me three weeks warning before moving out and not turning back. The reasons are unimportant as it was so long ago but it was the main reason I began to get down. She demanded that I sell the house and split it down the middle, which I did.

Fortunately my family were there for me and both my brother and sister took me in one after the other when the house had gone. My sister had a friend who ran a business in security and she managed to persuade him to give me a job. Soon after that I got myself an apartment and for a while it felt like I was back on track with my life.

I never once kidded myself that I wasn't missing my wife, I just tried to get on with life as best I could. Then one day about six months into my new job I sat down at work and felt totally lost. I was working 56 hours a week and seeing nothing in return because it was all going towards my rent/debts/bills etc. Suddenly and without warning I was in a deep depression, unfortunately I didn't recognise the symtems having never suffered from depression before.

I walked out of my job (and at the time I didn't care what happened to me) and a month later I'd lost my second home in the space of a year. I then began to live in a tent and with the aid of anti-depressants I've managed to get by whilst I'm waiting for the local council (local goverment) to find me a home.

Now for the reason I'm telling you all this. Last night I returned to my tent after getting a hot meal inside me and found that someone had not only stolen my two sleeping bags but also my inflatable bed and burnt down my tent.

I guess I just wanted to write it all down because I can hardly believe this tale myself and yet it's happening to me. You don't need to reply, I just wanted to talk that's all.

Carl

*HUGS*

I wish I could do something to help carl. I am living on charity from my folks until I get my disablity from social security or I would at least send enough for a new sleeping bag.

-Colly

Colleen Thomas said:

*HUGS*

I wish I could do something to help carl. I am living on charity from my folks until I get my disablity from social security or I would at least send enough for a new sleeping bag.

-Colly

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Edited to add: Actually I think there is a sleeping bag in the basement. I don't know how good it is, but you are welcome to it if you lke.

If you're living in a tent, where is your computer?

Colleen Thomas said:

Edited to add: Actually I think there is a sleeping bag in the basement. I don't know how good it is, but you are welcome to it if you lke.

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Colly, that is very sweet of you but I've got plans to replace everything I lost by tomorrow. I have a brother who is going to lend me the money.

Thank you though.

Carl

Syndra Lynn said:

If you're living in a tent, where is your computer?

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It's not my computer it's my brothers.

Carl

Thje only thing I can offer is *hugs* and a

destinie21 said:

Thje only thing I can offer is *hugs* and a

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It's funny but right about now I could do with a hug and a smile.

Thx

Carl

Hugs and warm wet thoughts go out to you.

Syn

Oh, Carl. I don't know what to say. That is so sad.

There's some real ignorant bastards in this world, and if I ever got my hands on the shits...

Anyway, don't be like me. Don't get mad, get sorted.

I'm glad to know you've got family nearby, who can help you out. I hope the council sort you pronto in the morning, and it's a sad state of affairs that all they have to offer you is a tent.

My thoughts are with you, sweetie. And some HUGE *hugs* too.

Be sure to let me know how you are going. PM me, if you like.

Katie

Tatelou said:

I hope the council sort you pronto in the morning, and it's a sad state of affairs that all they have to offer you is a tent.

My thoughts are with you, sweetie. And some HUGE *hugs* too.

Be sure to let me know how you are going. PM me, if you like.

Katie

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What's really sad is that they don't give out tents, you have to buy that yourself. All they do is place you on a waiting list for housing, six months later and I'm still waiting.

Thank you for those kind words Katie, sometimes it's enough just to know someone is thinking about you.



Carl

Carl East said:

What's really sad is that they don't give out tents, you have to buy that yourself. All they do is place you on a waiting list for housing, six months later and I'm still waiting.

Thank you for those kind words Katie, sometimes it's enough just to know someone is thinking about you.



Carl

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Bloody hell!

I have heard of Hampshire County Council giving out tents, so I presumed the council where you are did the same thing.

That's very sad. I know you will have looked into all avenues, but won't they even put you into B&B acommodation?

That sucks.

You need more than just hugs, babe, but that's all I can offer right now.

Katie

Tatelou said:

That's very sad. I know you will have looked into all avenues, but won't they even put you into B&B acommodation?

That sucks.

You need more than just hugs, babe, but that's all I can offer right now.

Katie

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I'm going to see the council again tomorrow and I'll ask that very question. Although I can probably guess the answer. My council has a very bad reputation of being completely incompetent.

Carl

I know I must sound very Naive, but what is a Counsel and why can't you just go rent an appartment? Is houseing that hard to find or are they just being jerks?

Carl, I haven't much to say that might prove truly helpful. I too feel for you, not pity but real compassion. I can't bear the suffering of others. I've found you to be as fine a gentleman as any other on this board. Glad you have your brother, mine are precious, don't know how I'd have gone through some times without them.

Please know I care, for what it's worth. Do read my sig line, it's a fave and I believe true. It gives me hope.

bless you, Perdita

Not being able to do anything concrete, I just wanted to add my *hugs* and my prayers for you hon. Be well, and be safe, and know that we're pulling for you.

Whisp

Ditto.

Colleen Thomas said:

I know I must sound very Naive, but what is a Counsel and why can't you just go rent an appartment? Is houseing that hard to find or are they just being jerks?

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Let me explain the Council or should I say the enigma. The council are voted representatives of which ever town or city you happen to be in. In theory they should adhere to the rules and regulations written down by the government, you will notice I said "in theory." lol

Now for each social problem such as homelessness there should be contingency plans laid down by the government which the council have to follow. Guidelines if you like.

Depending on the urgency, because all situations are different, a person is awarded points. These points vary, for instance if there were children involved I'd probably get emergency accomadation straight away. It all depends on the severity of the individual case. In my case I'm able bodied and able to work.

Now this is where our system goes wrong. Although I am able to work no employer will give me a job without me giving them a current address. So I find myself in a catch twenty two situation, I can't get a job because I'm homeless and I can't get a home without going through the council. In other words the home must come first.

So when the council decide to give me an apartment or bedsit I can then go and get myself a job and get back on my feet. I'm not holding my breathe though, I've been waiting for those total dicks for over six months now.

Carl

Can your GP do anything to help, you said you are on anti-depressants While there is nothing wrong with that i have been on and off them for 4 years now but you need stability to help you get through this. I know it may be embarrising discussing this with the council but if its gonna help it will be worth it.
As for work would your family be willing to let you use their house as a contact adress. If you are worried about the council ask them if you can do this without harming your points, explain it would just be an adress for you and not a place to saty.

most importantly of all stay psative DONT let the bastards get you down. things will get better, maybe not right away but hlod on to the good things you have, family and pleanty of freinds as this thread shows.

good luck and a huge hug.

I add my hugs to those that have gone already.

Council's suck in general there are so many silly loop holes and so much unneccesary paper work. I can't believe they've just shoved you in a tent though. I hope the situation brightens for you..you're in my prayers.

Hello Carl,

I've never talked to you before on Lit but I wish you better and better days ahead.

Depression can be truly overwhelming. I admire that you get back on your horse (or find a new horse when someone takes your old one away) and plough on ahead.

A hug and
Mia

Carl, it's good to see you checking in again.

EL's right, councils up and down the country suck. The is so much leakage of funds, and downright incompetence, I begrudge paying council tax.

How did you get on with them today? Any joy, at all? Have you thought about applying to the Social Fund for a grant?

Sorry about all of the questions, but I've had my own extensive dealings with housing departments and the such in my time.

Keep your pecker up, babe.

Katie-Lou

Catch 22

I understand you have a catch 22 situation going there and I really feel for you in your present situation. It amazes me how fragile all we've worked for and accomplished is. I have compassion for you and hope things get better quickly. I do have one question for you though... Can you get a P.O. Box and use that as your address to get a job? or borrow your brother's address as your address to get you started? Or are you in another catch 22 in that the council will help you with housing as long as you're unemployed but won't help you if you don't make enough to live on?

I wish you luck.

JJ1

Edited because I'm a dolt!

Tatelou said:

Carl, it's good to see you checking in again.

EL's right, councils up and down the country suck. The is so much leakage of funds, and downright incompetence, I begrudge paying council tax.

How did you get on with them today? Any joy, at all? Have you thought about applying to the Social Fund for a grant?

Sorry about all of the questions, but I've had my own extensive dealings with housing departments and the such in my time.

Keep your pecker up, babe.

Katie-Lou

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Continuing the saga. lol

Today the social security office totally mystified me. I'd gone there on my brothers advice because they will do crisis loans, depending on the importance, or degree of the crisis.

So, they tell me that the only thing they consider to be crucial is the sleeping bags. Apparently tents come under accommadation, which they are not responsible for. A bed inflatable or otherwise is a luxury. When they told me this I simply said 'I'm at the social security office aren't I?'

My brother is going to ring the council up tomorrow and ask them if his house burnt down would they re-house him straight away. If they say yes to this, which is what he expects, he will then tell them that the Social security office class my tent as accomadation, I think he wants to see how they crawl out of that one.

On a brighter note I did visit the council again today and found out that my points have gone up, which means I'm nearer to getting a place of my own.

I've given them my sisters address as a (care of address) but that only covers post and wouldn't be counted as an address on a job application form. I've thought of lying to a respective employer but they might then check me up (and this is very likely) with the social who would then tell them I'm homeless. Lying on an application form over here is taken seriously so the chances are I'd lose my job before I got settled in.

So, I've gone the lawful and honest route and after six months my honesty is just about useless. I have no doubt that I will be housed eventually but the time it takes these people is quite pathetic. I'll let you know how the council answer my brothers question tommorrow.

Carl

Carl, add my prayers in.

I was in much the same boat. I didn't end up living in a tent, but I was living in a warehouse for ex-mental patients, a fair number of whom should have still been hospitalised.

But in spite of everything, it sounds like you are handling it well. Unlike the way I was for a long time, you seem to be still be able to look to the future.

Finally, don't sweat the small stuff. And it's all small stuff