LITEROTICA PODCAST
LIT CAMS (200 Free Tokens)ADULT TOYSVOD MOVIES

Dragon's Den

Oh, how nice! Thank you for reading the story and the flattering review. :kiss: :kiss: The tale was intentionally brief. I worried about short circuiting and such. ;)

Dragonteeth said:

A humorous little story of a “Testing Engineer” and his subject. Detailing precisely how each system should be evaluated for safety and fun-ctionality.

A highly original piece bearing all the hallmarks of a good D/s scene, told with tongue firmly in cheek. There are a couple of technical issues, but generally, it is well written. The main thing I find wrong with it is that it seems very short. Maybe this is merely an interim evaluation and a more thorough service should be undertaken at alternate intervals.

This Story has been Officially Dragon tested and Approved.

-=(5)=-​
Click to expand...
 

A brave attempt to capture the poetry and romance of the 1001 nights. Sadly, this author is no Sheherazade. This story does have several problems, but it also demonstrates some interesting use of language. With care and practice, I hope to read more and better from this author, they seem to have written a several.

The main problem I find with this story is that no storyteller, wherever they were in the world would tell this tale to “youngsters” in the corner of a marketplace. At least he wouldn’t get beyond describing Aziz’s dick. There is also the issue of our hero’s profession. In one sentence, he is a tailor, yet in the next sentence he is a cobbler.

Certainly the services of a good editor would help but a lot of the issues with this story could easily be resolved by the author merely reading through their own work.


-=(3)=-​
 
wanderlustress said:
Oh, how nice! Thank you for reading the story and the flattering review. :kiss: :kiss: The tale was intentionally brief. I worried about short circuiting and such. ;)
Click to expand...


Had it been just a little longer I might have had a "short circuit" myself. No matter, it works well, please don't think it was a major complaint. It wasnt intended to be.

I really do look forward to more.
 

Deirdre is the only girl around who actually keeps a unicorn in her stable, and when her sister comes for a visit, she is keen to show off her talented pet.

This story is just great fun. The "child like", slightly naive style works very well with the content. I'm going to have to come back to this and have a look at the other stories in this series.

-=(5)=-​
 
Dragonteeth said:
Ow do Joey...

Of course it's mid afternoon here.
Click to expand...


Guess it would be. Its early here still, just going 8am..

Great thread you have going here.
 
joeys-game said:
Guess it would be. Its early here still, just going 8am..

Great thread you have going here.
Click to expand...

Thanks...

Seems somewhat lacking in feedback around here, but I'm enjoying reading the stories.

Hope some people are finding it helpful.
 

Syrah believes she has been abducted, but finds her captivity less awful than she expects. The author suggests that this story is a "Romance" with elements of BDSM. I don’t find much of "Romance" in it, but that does not affect the nature of the story it’s self.

Technically this story has some tricky elements. Internal dialog, (thinking) can be difficult to render in a coherent manner, and there is a lot of that in this story. As a result, I find the thought passages break the flow and make the story difficult to read. The basic concepts are good, if not very original and there is some interesting characterisation.

-=(3)=-​
 
thank you for the review

Dragonteeth said:

Syrah believes she has been abducted, but finds her captivity less awful than she expects. The author suggests that this story is a "Romance" with elements of BDSM. I don’t find much of "Romance" in it, but that does not affect the nature of the story it’s self.

Technically this story has some tricky elements. Internal dialog, (thinking) can be difficult to render in a coherent manner, and there is a lot of that in this story. As a result, I find the thought passages break the flow and make the story difficult to read. The basic concepts are good, if not very original and there is some interesting characterisation.

-=(3)=-​
Click to expand...

Ah, so you are the one who gave me the three :)

Syrah is a slave and alone so the story will keep unfolding in her head mostly. I will see what I can do in upcoming edits.

Thank you for the review,

Maharat
 
maharat48 said:
Ah, so you are the one who gave me the three :)

Syrah is a slave and alone so the story will keep unfolding in her head mostly. I will see what I can do in upcoming edits.

Thank you for the review,

Maharat
Click to expand...


I do look forward to reading more. I see you've put a second episode up so I'll go have a look in a few days. I have quite a few more to do.
 
Dragonteeth said:

Deirdre is the only girl around who actually keeps a unicorn in her stable, and when her sister comes for a visit, she is keen to show off her talented pet.

This story is just great fun. The "child like", slightly naive style works very well with the content. I'm going to have to come back to this and have a look at the other stories in this series.

-=(5)=-​
Click to expand...

Thanks for the good review, Dragon. This was the third of the series, and they were all fun to write. I don't know if I will be adding any more or not.

Actually, Deidre is not the only girl with a unicorn; she is just the only one I have written about. :D
 
and good evening from the mountains of South West London...

I've been somewhat under the weather lately with a rotten cold and completely lost my voice. a bit of a worry for carmina in a few weeks.

feeling definately better this evening and of course it's the lunar eclipse tonight...
 

‘Ere be Surrealism! (…And pretty darned good surrealism too.) Surrealist literature can be impenetrable and confusing, but this author keeps a tight hold on the reins of absurdity to make an entertaining statement that conjures some wonderfully erotic images. It is certainly not the author’s fault if some readers fail to appreciate such things. There is a conundrum here though; it is a style that many people don’t understand. Should the author court a wider audience and tone down the bizarre, or should they remain true to themselves and write what they feel? Maybe this writer is clever enough to manage a little of both.

That said there are a few spots where a little more care could have been taken in the grammar department, and as usual I’d recommend getting someone to read through it before submitting in future.

-=(5)=-​
 
Last edited:
Good Moaning {{{{Dragon}}} :kiss: :p :kiss:
Hope you feel better again soon Hun!
Bringing some Hugs ~Squeezes & :kiss: s & some TLC for you :)
 
Dumpling said:
Good Moaning {{{{Dragon}}} :kiss: :p :kiss:
Hope you feel better again soon Hun!
Bringing some Hugs ~Squeezes & :kiss: s & some TLC for you :)
Click to expand...


Thank's ling...

Yeah I need some TLC voice still a bit ropey and frankly feeling very down today.
 
Dragonteeth said:

‘Ere be Surrealism! (…And pretty darned good surrealism too.) Surrealist literature can be impenetrable and confusing, but this author keeps a tight hold on the reins of absurdity to make an entertaining statement that conjures some wonderfully erotic images. It is certainly not the author’s fault if some readers fail to appreciate such things. There is a conundrum here though; it is a style that many people don’t understand. Should the author court a wider audience and tone down the bizarre, or should they remain true to themselves and write what they feel? Maybe this writer is clever enough to manage a little of both.

That said there are a few spots where a little more care could have been taken in the grammar department, and as usual I’d recommend getting someone to read through it before submitting in future.

-=(5)=-​
Click to expand...

I'm reluctant to actually CHANGE a review once it's been posted, however it does appear that wanderlustress has had some further feedback on her story. It is a challenging piece that requires the reader to take an entirely fresh viewpoint.

While I stand by my comments, it appears that there was editorial input to this work and I feel I should point out that the gramatical inconsitancies are apparently the result of artistic and stylistic decision and not a failure of the author or the editor.

It doesn't affect my opinion of the story since it's still a great piece of work, and I have already given it full marks.

It is a piece which seems to be raising strong opinions so perhaps you should read it for yourselves and make up your own mind.
 
Thanks for the swell review, Dragonteeth! I truly appreciate it! :kiss: As per the conundrum you bring up: I'm not about to be true to anyone but myself yet not everything I write is "bizarre" or as over-the-top as this story. The Tantric Electrician, for example, uses a completely different tone. It's vanilla by comparison, in my opinion. I do what I have to do - whatever the story requires. Sometimes I remain on Planet Earth; sometimes I go elsewhere. :)

Dragonteeth said:

‘Ere be Surrealism! (…And pretty darned good surrealism too.) Surrealist literature can be impenetrable and confusing, but this author keeps a tight hold on the reins of absurdity to make an entertaining statement that conjures some wonderfully erotic images. It is certainly not the author’s fault if some readers fail to appreciate such things. There is a conundrum here though; it is a style that many people don’t understand. Should the author court a wider audience and tone down the bizarre, or should they remain true to themselves and write what they feel? Maybe this writer is clever enough to manage a little of both.

That said there are a few spots where a little more care could have been taken in the grammar department, and as usual I’d recommend getting someone to read through it before submitting in future.

-=(5)=-​
Click to expand...
 
Thanks wanderlustress...

Well I thought I'd ring some changes round here.

It's not just for reviews.

So I thought I'd drop a couple of pics in here.

A few people have commented on my "Moon AV" and of course there's a story attached. I was watching the eclipse, and my Dad wanted to take some pictures. He has a couple of telescopes and we had his big camera attatched to the small one. The Big one is too much for Lunar Observing. Unfortunately the Camera wasn't working, so we took the camera off and took it in turns to just look through the scope. Then I had the idea to hold my phone camera up to the eyepiece of the scope and the AV is the result.

It was cropped from this image.

 
I posted the pictures of my snowman in the "London Ladies" thread, but since no one seems to go there I thought I'd put it up here too.


Here he is, all 4'6" of him.

We had a little snow and I decided it would do me some good to get out and enjoy it. so I was up at 5:30 and I was putting the finishing touches to him as the kids wer all going to school. Put a smile on a lot of faces that morning, which of course put a smile on my face too.

You can see he's holding a thumb up.


This is the pic I used as my AV for a while
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

P
Why so many recycled stories?
Replies
13
Views
200
Kelliezgirl
Kelliezgirl
LargoKitt
Literotica--two two two sites in one
2
Replies
36
Views
879
M_K_Babalon
M_K_Babalon
B
Stories sent back "Dialogue"
2 3
Replies
67
Views
1K
NuclearFairy
NuclearFairy
NoCa
What's your best story?
2 3 4
Replies
77
Views
1K
FrancesScott
FrancesScott
FrancesScott
For the Literotica authors you admire best, what is it about their work that causes your admiration?
2
Replies
45
Views
1K
MelissaBaby
MelissaBaby
Back
Top