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Rimming!

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Time to revisit this thread :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/02/10112131/bdsmlr-10112131-kVRTzZ8xbn.gif

And a question for everyone: how do you bring up rimming to a partner? Do you ask them verbally, before or during sex? Or do you work your way to their ass and if they don't object, continue? Or do you have another method?
 
WillowySparkles said:
Time to revisit this thread :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/02/10112131/bdsmlr-10112131-kVRTzZ8xbn.gif

And a question for everyone: how do you bring up rimming to a partner? Do you ask them verbally, before or during sex? Or do you work your way to their ass and if they don't object, continue? Or do you have another method?
Click to expand...

Personally, I think one should lead by example. So, one needs to first perform the act once or twice and maybe even more and then ask them if they liked it. Providing they did not push you off or mentioned it immediately, it’s a fair bet they enjoy it.

You could then gently suggest, “my turn”. That could well go for any sexual act.
 
WillowySparkles said:
Time to revisit this thread :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/02/10112131/bdsmlr-10112131-kVRTzZ8xbn.gif

And a question for everyone: how do you bring up rimming to a partner? Do you ask them verbally, before or during sex? Or do you work your way to their ass and if they don't object, continue? Or do you have another method?
Click to expand...

Every once in a while it will come up in conversation, if you have it, about likes and dislikes and if that person is likes ass play or straight up rimming, you should be good to go. Otherwise if there was no conversation before hand about likes and dislikes, then start out slow and during giving oral you start to move further south and if they don't object, then you can try to move to their ass with your tongue and continue on. If they really aren't into that or don't want it, they will object and let you know. If you're on the receiving end and really want them to rim you, and they're not going there, then you better resort to the likes and dislikes conversation and find out if they're into giving rimming. That would be my suggestion from past experiences.
 
Vitriolhack said:
Personally, I think one should lead by example. So, one needs to first perform the act once or twice and maybe even more and then ask them if they liked it. Providing they did not push you off or mentioned it immediately, it’s a fair bet they enjoy it.

You could then gently suggest, “my turn”. That could well go for any sexual act.
Click to expand...

That's a nice way of going about it.

Here's another question: say you do perform it on your lover. They don't push you away, but they don't have any noticeable reaction to it. Do you ask them afterwards if they liked it, or do you shrug it off and try it again at a later time?
 
WillowySparkles said:
I currently shave my pubic hair. I used to when I was younger, but when I was in my 40's I stopped. Then last year during the lockdown I was home and bored to tears. I wanted something to do, so I thought why not shave my pubic hair. So I shaved it off and have kept it bare since.
Click to expand...

Not that it would matter to me, but if I was your partner, I'd be glad that you were bored one day and were looking fir something to do and found a fun activity. He'll, I'd even help you out with your new activity.
 
GBPFan1975 said:
Not that it would matter to me, but if I was your partner, I'd be glad that you were bored one day and were looking fir something to do and found a fun activity. He'll, I'd even help you out with your new activity.
Click to expand...

And if you were my partner I certainly would have invited you to help. I'm positive it would have been a lot more fun :)
 
GBPFan1975 said:
Every once in a while it will come up in conversation, if you have it, about likes and dislikes and if that person is likes ass play or straight up rimming, you should be good to go. Otherwise if there was no conversation before hand about likes and dislikes, then start out slow and during giving oral you start to move further south and if they don't object, then you can try to move to their ass with your tongue and continue on. If they really aren't into that or don't want it, they will object and let you know. If you're on the receiving end and really want them to rim you, and they're not going there, then you better resort to the likes and dislikes conversation and find out if they're into giving rimming. That would be my suggestion from past experiences.
Click to expand...

I can agree with this. If you rim your lover several times, and they don't object, and even react positively to it, but don't do the same to you, then yes, a conversation should be the next step. If two people are intimate with each other, there shouldn't be any topic that is off limits to discuss.
 
WillowySparkles said:
I can agree with this. If you rim your lover several times, and they don't object, and even react positively to it, but don't do the same to you, then yes, a conversation should be the next step. If two people are intimate with each other, there shouldn't be any topic that is off limits to discuss.
Click to expand...

To be honest, I haven’t had a partner who has shown interest in rimming. In the past, during foreplay I would allow my finger to graze the area to gauge her reaction to anal play in general. If she stiffened up, I would stop and ask if she was ok. This typically led to one of two reactions - either no interest or just caught her by surprise. If the latter, I would ask if she was now ready. If the former, I would ask if there may be some interest in trying (usual response was no).
While being “aggressive” in sex can be good, I never do anything that will make her uncomfortable. If we were together long enough, then the conversation comes easier. When it is a newer thing, I found that most women I met did not want to have that conversation.
For whatever reason, the women in my life that I have met have been less adventurous. One of the things the at led me to Lit was the hope that I may meet those that are. And honestly, while I have, it’s been a limited number (and it’s all been online and not in person). I always enjoy meeting like minded women who are open to more than just the standard/vanilla.
And online, it’s very different because it’s all conversation as opposed to actual engagement in a specific act.
 
clark_kent said:
To be honest, I haven’t had a partner who has shown interest in rimming. In the past, during foreplay I would allow my finger to graze the area to gauge her reaction to anal play in general. If she stiffened up, I would stop and ask if she was ok. This typically led to one of two reactions - either no interest or just caught her by surprise. If the latter, I would ask if she was now ready. If the former, I would ask if there may be some interest in trying (usual response was no).
While being “aggressive” in sex can be good, I never do anything that will make her uncomfortable. If we were together long enough, then the conversation comes easier. When it is a newer thing, I found that most women I met did not want to have that conversation.
For whatever reason, the women in my life that I have met have been less adventurous. One of the things the at led me to Lit was the hope that I may meet those that are. And honestly, while I have, it’s been a limited number (and it’s all been online and not in person). I always enjoy meeting like minded women who are open to more than just the standard/vanilla.
And online, it’s very different because it’s all conversation as opposed to actual engagement in a specific act.
Click to expand...

Yes, not everyone is into rimming. As we've discussed, it's one of those taboo topics. And perhaps women are less likely to try it then men. It would be an interesting study if someone did a poll and looked for reactions.

Like you, I introduce it during sex. Most often when I'm going down on him. I'll play and work towards his ass and see how he responds. If he's enjoying it, then I'll continue. If not, then I'll ease off and maybe try it again if given the opportunity. I also may just flat out ask him afterwards. It depends on how comfortable I am with him and whether or not he's willing to discuss it openly of if he's too uncomfortable talking about it.
 
WillowySparkles said:
Yes, not everyone is into rimming. As we've discussed, it's one of those taboo topics. And perhaps women are less likely to try it then men. It would be an interesting study if someone did a poll and looked for reactions.

Like you, I introduce it during sex. Most often when I'm going down on him. I'll play and work towards his ass and see how he responds. If he's enjoying it, then I'll continue. If not, then I'll ease off and maybe try it again if given the opportunity. I also may just flat out ask him afterwards. It depends on how comfortable I am with him and whether or not he's willing to discuss it openly of if he's too uncomfortable talking about it.
Click to expand...

Sounds like we are on the same page.
I have found that most of my partners (including current - but that’s a matter unto itself) are uncomfortable talking about sex in general, let alone the more adventurous side. Lit was the first time I actually felt better about discussing (and has opened me to many new ideas).
Eventually I’ve had to determine my highest priorities and what I am therefore willing to forego up in order to be content. I would prefer to not forgo, but you can’t always get what you want!

And on topic, I would hesitate to start rimming without discussing at first unless I know she prepped first! LOL
 
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clark_kent said:
Sounds like we are on the same page.
I have found that most of my partners (including current - but that’s a matter unto itself) are uncomfortable talking about sex in general, let alone the more adventurous side. Lit was the first time I actually felt better about discussing (and has opened me to many new ideas).
Eventually I’ve had to determine my highest priorities and what I am therefore willing to forego up in order to be content. I would prefer to not forgo, but you can’t always get what you want!

And on topic, I would hesitate to start rimming without discussing at first unless I know she prepped first! LOL
Click to expand...

In addition…..this!
https://el.phncdn.com/gif/13359041.gif
 
WillowySparkles said:
Yes, not everyone is into rimming. As we've discussed, it's one of those taboo topics. And perhaps women are less likely to try it then men. It would be an interesting study if someone did a poll and looked for reactions.

Like you, I introduce it during sex. Most often when I'm going down on him. I'll play and work towards his ass and see how he responds. If he's enjoying it, then I'll continue. If not, then I'll ease off and maybe try it again if given the opportunity. I also may just flat out ask him afterwards. It depends on how comfortable I am with him and whether or not he's willing to discuss it openly of if he's too uncomfortable talking about it.
Click to expand...

A little finger tease during oral will give you a sense of whether she'll freak out. Then a slow tongue tease that finally lands on your target. Talking is good, but talking will kill the prospect. No need to be aggressive, just tender and loving. You'll either have a great time or you can concentrate on other things.
 
WillowySparkles said:
Time to revisit this thread :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/02/10112131/bdsmlr-10112131-kVRTzZ8xbn.gif

And a question for everyone: how do you bring up rimming to a partner? Do you ask them verbally, before or during sex? Or do you work your way to their ass and if they don't object, continue? Or do you have another method?
Click to expand...

I guess it was about twenty years ago and the first time we were together.
I was going down on her and in the heat of the moment, my tongue slid across her hole. Well she just grabbed my head and pressed it in more. From that day on it was part of our normal routine, however, we never discussed it. To this day, she has only returned the favor a few times. She is just not into it. It wasn’t until I met someone online who was very much into it (and quite a few other things, but that’s another story) that I was able to discuss it openly and with enthusiasm. My online partner and I never met, but if we ever did, it would have been amazing, I’m quite sure of it.

So anyway, I truly believe communication is important for both to be satisfied.
I’m ok with her not returning but it is still something I want badly.
 
WillowySparkles said:
That's a nice way of going about it.

Here's another question: say you do perform it on your lover. They don't push you away, but they don't have any noticeable reaction to it. Do you ask them afterwards if they liked it, or do you shrug it off and try it again at a later time?
Click to expand...

I would ask them if they liked the new “moves”. 😜
It’s a good idea to keep and open mind and communication channel.
 
Lovethefox said:
So anyway, I truly believe communication is important for both to be satisfied.
I’m ok with her not returning but it is still something I want badly.
Click to expand...

Vitriolhack said:
I would ask them if they liked the new “moves”. 😜
It’s a good idea to keep and open mind and communication channel.
Click to expand...

Yes, communication is very important with your partner :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/02/10112131/bdsmlr-10112131-HexH5lHRdN.gif
 
clark_kent said:
It seems to me she is communicating extremely well with her partner. But that could just be me.
Click to expand...

I believe you are right. Oral skills are an important part of communications :)

https://cdn012.**********/uploads/photos/2021/09/10453215/bdsmlr-10453215-aCLwGSuYFQ.webp
 
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