Seven Letter Post Office X 3 Redux

[Handley_Page]

It was found, among other tidbits, that the lady enjoyed being tickled with a feather on her bare flesh.

while wearing only her leather mask

 

[Tio_Narratore]

while wearing only her leather mask

- a mask hand-crafted for her at the reknowned atelier du cuire.

 

[HBergeron]

- a mask hand-crafted for her at the reknowned atelier du cuire.

She prefers to be incognito when she endeavors to relieve the townsmen of their stress.

 

[Handley_Page]

She prefers to be incognito when she endeavors to relieve the townsmen of their stress.

Or so they say. If you believe that, you'll believe anything. . .

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Or so they say. If you believe that, you'll believe anything. . .

But give no credence to the parish priest's slander; he reviles her out of pure jealousy.

 

[HBergeron]

But give no credence to the parish priest's slander; he reviles her out of pure jealousy.

No matter what he says, his intonation imbues his words with veritas.

 

[Handley_Page]

No matter what he says, his intonation imbues his words with veritas.

and a foot with a verruca.

 

[HBergeron]

and a foot with a verruca.

The congregation knew he was hiding something by the way he would overact.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

The congregation knew he was hiding something by the way he would overact.

He would always 'eat up the scenery' when paired with a buxom actress.

 

[HBergeron]

He would always 'eat up the scenery' when paired with a buxom actress.

Although their passionate performances frequently crested well before the third act.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Although their passionate performances frequently crested well before the third act.

, thusexposing the secrets they both shared: premature climaxing.

 

[HBergeron]

, thusexposing the secrets they both shared: premature climaxing.

However, to this day he still asserts that it was just 'acting'.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

However, to this day he still asserts that it was just 'acting'.

But the girl's who hang out on the bar's terrace know it was for real.

 

[HBergeron]

But the girl's who hang out on the bar's terrace know it was for real.

Not that what those trollops think would ever detract from his version of what happened.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Not that what those trollops think would ever detract from his version of what happened.

He'd sing a different tune were he to find himself trapped by those trollops he so deeply disappointed.

 

[Handley_Page]

He'd sing a different tune were he to find himself trapped by those trollops he so deeply disappointed.

He sang it after he tripped over his shoe-laces, didn't he ?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

He sang it after he tripped over his shoe-laces, didn't he ?

He could hardly be blamed for the distraction that caused his fall; her ripened melons would even have turned the head of the Pope himself!

 

[HBergeron]

He could hardly be blamed for the distraction that caused his fall; her ripened melons would even have turned the head of the Pope himself!

The Pope's head would certainly have turned back had he seen the piety with which she said, "Oh God", when he entered her.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

The Pope's head would certainly have turned back had he seen the piety with which she said, "Oh God", when he entered her.

Though it might add some passion to his performance when he attends to his priestly duties.

 

[HBergeron]

Though it might add some passion to his performance when he attends to his priestly duties.

When he's back in the Sacristy, he turns his attention to more sinful matters.

 

[Handley_Page]

When he's back in the Sacristy, he turns his attention to more sinful matters.

leaving her reputation in tatters

 

[HBergeron]

leaving her reputation in tatters

When she finally left through the side door, she had attracted at least one stalker.

 

[Handley_Page]

When she finally left through the side door, she had attracted at least one stalker.

The subsequent attacks were traced to an itinerant ex-marine.

 

[HBergeron]

The subsequent attacks were traced to an itinerant ex-marine.

When his neighbors were interviewed later, they said he was a loner and an outcast.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

When his neighbors were interviewed later, they said he was a loner and an outcast.

Though some gave a fuller account of his demented proclivities.